Website

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A typical website

A website is a location at which a spider spins a web. Websites are commonly used as material for bookcovers and artificial banana skins.

Their main purpose is as a repository for pornographic images, which otherwise would fill hard drives and restrict PCs to Windows 95 levels. Microsoft, in their constant struggle to improve the smooth running of computers and operating systems, took drastic steps as the Millenium Bug (see Godzilla vs the Millenium Bug) threatened to take over the world.

Another popular use for websites now is as writing material. Nubile Teens often enjoy acquiring pet spiders and creating their own website. Watching these creatures spin these websites into what is sometimes termed the "world wide web" can be a fun and enjoyable experience for the whole family, provided the parents are out for the evening.

A fine example of a website is http://www.makeliamfamous.tk, an uterly pointless website with problems with mathematics and with small words such as pronouns.

Creating a successful website[edit]

There are a set number of steps necessary in creating a successful website. Start by analysing the average from the content of the most successful websites, and then through subtle manipulation copy and paste, know to Webmasters as the "Copy and Paste Technique".

Standard subject matter should include:

It is important to try to add lots of large images, as well as javascript, enabling "snowfall" or "magic" mouse trails. Embedded MIDI files are a must.

Example website[edit]

Internet Explorer 8.png
Welcome to my site
I can do HTML n evereefin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Im cool n' stuff coz I can do blank pages like this and stuff
Recent News

}}

On this day...
Don't Droppings!

December 4: Crow and Raven Revenge Day, Take a Crap Day the one day women poop; it smells like roses

  • c.125,000 BCE - Tool-using crows are seen by early humans and copied. Initially amused, crows are aghast when humans eat whole cow pies instead of probing them for grubs and bugs.
  • 1999 BCE - l337 5p3ak 15 kr34t3d.
  • 30 CE - Und Jeebus sayd undo da poepple, 'Whoom doo yoo tink eye am?', und da poepple repped, 'You are the exhiological replication of our being, the vast immiturication of a higher homosapianism, the essence of zoology.', und Jeebuz sez, 'Eh?'
  • 1596 - The flushing toilet is invented by John Harington. Charles Outhouse threatens suit.
  • 1597 - Crows and ravens learn to flush toilets after using them but refuse to replace toilet paper rolls.
  • 1680 - Ravens settle into the Tower of London by building their nests inside Beefeater's heads. Londoners think, 'That's so raven.'
  • 1874 - Thomas Crapper invents an improved flush toilet, though historians credit the building of sewers underneath flush toilets to be the better improvement.
  • 1898 - Crows finally get a measure of revenge on humanity by creating "Old Crow" brand rotgut bourbon.
  • 1973 - Crows and ravens start to circle around Richard Nixon during his personal appearances.
  • 1993 - Frank Zappa's reported death occurs. He reaches a higher plane and is reincarnated as a raven.
  • 2010 - Rick James comes back to life, grabs 100 kilos of cocaine, then vanishes.
  • 2019 - Edgar Allen Poe is resurrected, creates a Hip Hop dance hit called "The Raven (Nevermore Remix)", then disappears without a trace. A week later, just before the release of the album, all copies of the recordings of the song disappear as well, including all the pre-release leaks on Torrent.
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SkinFlute.png

SkinFlute.png - 12 things that are more than they seem ( 13 / 1 )
SkinFlute.png

The Skin Flute, an instrument that many bohemians and crack-whores enjoy playing in their spare time, has greatly increased in popularity due to additives that can increase comfortable playing time by nearly four hours. Oftentimes, a skin flautist uses the instrument of another to play their masterpieces, for which they are either paid a substantial sum, given a follow-up performance, or neither. The practice of giving a skin flute to more than one person to play has led to the spread of many STDs - that is, skinflute transmitted diseases - and has thus also increased its cultural taboo.

Image credit: Zombiebaron

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Writer and Noob of the Month
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GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


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Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


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It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!


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