A website is a location at which a spider spins a web. Websites are commonly used as material for bookcovers and artificial banana skins.
Their main purpose is as a repository for pornographic images, which otherwise would fill hard drives and restrict PCs to Windows 95 levels. Microsoft, in their constant struggle to improve the smooth running of computers and operating systems, took drastic steps as the Millenium Bug (see Godzilla vs the Millenium Bug) threatened to take over the world.
Another popular use for websites now is as writing material. Nubile Teens often enjoy acquiring pet spiders and creating their own website. Watching these creatures spin these websites into what is sometimes termed the "world wide web" can be a fun and enjoyable experience for the whole family, provided the parents are out for the evening.
A fine example of a website is http://www.makeliamfamous.tk, an uterly pointless website with problems with mathematics and with small words such as pronouns.
Creating a successful website[edit]
There are a set number of steps necessary in creating a successful website. Start by analysing the average from the content of the most successful websites, and then through subtle manipulation copy and paste, know to Webmasters as the "Copy and Paste Technique".
Standard subject matter should include:
It is important to try to add lots of large images, as well as javascript, enabling "snowfall" or "magic" mouse trails. Embedded MIDI files are a must.
Example website[edit]
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Welcome to my site
I can do HTML n evereefin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Im cool n' stuff coz I can do blank pages like this and stuff
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Recent News
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On this day...
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October 31: International Dress Like an Idiot Day, International Annoy Strangers Into Giving Away Candy Day
- 30 - Jesus performs another miracle, turning celery sticks into chocolate and regular corn into candy corn.
- 475 - Romulus Augustulus is proclaimed Roman Emperor, while wearing a white toga over his head, with eye holes cut in it.
- 1219 - The governor of Samarkand mistakes the army of Genghis Khan for a group of buddhist monks dressed up like the Khan's army, and opens the gates for them. Samarkand is sacked, looted, and burned. The Khan is pissed off when the army returns home and has already eaten all the candy.
- 1517 - The Protestant Reformation begins. After spending all week on his robot costume, Martin Luther dresses up and goes to the local church but they won't give him candy. He plays a trick on them by spreading his theses all over the church door.
- 1680 - A highwayman, having lost his horse, goes door to door, holding up residents. British Halloween is born, as is Inland Revenue.
- 1897 - The City of London's Best Halloween Costume prize is awarded to Oscar Wilde for his clever Oscar Wilde costume.
- 1927 - The October Uprising was rushed through on this day to save them changing all the letterheads.
- 1956 - Suez Crisis: to force Egypt to reopen the Suez Canal, the United Kingdom and France begin a massive bombardment of Egypt using water balloons and raw eggs.
- 1961 - In the Soviet Union, Josef Stalin's frozen body is removed from Lenin's Tomb. Stalin's body is then dressed up as Frankenstein and then set outside Kruschev's house as part of a scary Halloween diorama. Communist Party members are initially outraged, but come around when Kruschev's house wins the USSR's Halloween house decoration contest.
- 1969 - Women discover that instead of putting time into making an awesome costume they can just take a normal job uniform and slut it up a bit.
- 1969 - Men are okay with the above.
- 1980 - First Glam rock conclave standardizes dressing like an idiot in the '80s.
- 2002 - Evangelical Christians inaugurate Complain About Something Unimportant Again Day.
- 2005 - Everyday dressing like an idiot is now at a record high.
- 2005 - A severe storm strikes Glace Bay, Nova Scotia producing eggs, fireworks, pumpkins, crab-apples, and rocks. Homes and cars are damaged and several police cruisers are damaged by intense rock showers.
- 2006 - Washington D.C.'s "Scariest Halloween Costume" prize is awarded to Dick Cheney. Says Cheney, "But I didn't even dress up!"
- 2016 - ISIS suicide bombers ring a doorbell but just as they do, a roadrunner goes "MEEP! MEEP!", causing them to detonate their explosives prematurely. The operatives thoroughly enjoy their raisins in the afterlife.
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Writer and Noob of the Month
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GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!
Seriously, we love you.
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.
Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!
HEIL FROSTY!
Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners
Oh my god! There are no more days left! It's today or miss the boat to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month, GET VOTING!!
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Uncyclopedia's sista projects
Uncyclopedia is an independent humor writing project, a non-profitable cabal that also hosts a range of other projects.
Uncyclopedia languages
This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 37,410 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and an elite clan of Clinjas.
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See also[edit]
