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Today's featured article – UnNews:King of Canada slams "pointless" vote

OTTAWA, Ontario -- ( listen) Rex (Latin for "King") Murphy has described as "pointless" Prime Minister Justin Trudeau's "snap" call for federal elections on September 20.

One of the remaining vestigial roles of Canada's monarch is to call out when Government does something "pointless." However, as Canada is a Parliamentary monarchy, they do it anyway.

Trudeau's Liberal [sic] Party holds 155 seats in the House of Commons, relying on fringe parties to help it achieve 169 of the 338 seats needed to stymie any promising legislation with a tie vote. However, pundits believe the Liberals could go all the way down to 93 seats, with the opposition picking up as many as 30. This would not be a majority, nor even 155, but would put it in the catbird seat for begging for fringe parties.

According to His Majesty, "You don't call an election because you would like a majority, but because it seems likely that you will get a majority. Thought everyone knew that one." (more...)

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Previously featured article – Flint, Michigan

Flint (or flintstone) is a hard, sedimentary cryptocrystalline form of the mineral quartz, categorized as a variety of chert. It occurs chiefly as nodules and masses in sedimentary rocks. (more...)

Did you know ...

... the combination of Steampunk and sous vide cooking was inevitable? (pictured)
... that many diseases can be prevented by washing hands before eating, after eating, during eating, and another couple of times just in case?
... Thomas Edison was arrested on charges of pornography following the release of his short film, Woman Whose Ankle Is Partly Visible?
... that the bow-tie is an aphrodisiac worn by male humans which instantly increases the sexual appeal of the wearer by 16%?
... that the Michigan Firehouse Museum is home to the largest collection of fire truck bell hanger mounting rivets in the United States?
... Ham Chan is a 4chan imageboard on Iranian servers dedicated to pork and pork products?
... my name is Iñigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to do something or the other?

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On this day

December 3: World Structural Engineering Day

2542 BCE - Egyptian Pharaoh Khufu commands that a round tower be built as his tomb. Engineers and the constructors build a giant pyramidal structure instead following earlier practices. After a facepalm, Khufu requests the engineers and construction managers to inspect the structure's interior, then seals them all inside. He then buys a plot at Forest Lawn, where he rests today.
422 BCE - Ancient Greece develops the concept of ethics. This would be ignored by structural engineers and most people throughout history.
24 CE - Jesus becomes a carpenter but many of his projects would be denied licenses without approval by structural engineers. Luckily, the cross He will be crucified on is fast-tracked by Roman engineers.
901 - Vikings remove the horns from their helmets due to attacks by amorous bulls and nearsighted toreadors.
1173 - The foundation is laid for the Tower of Pisa; and the building almost immediately begins to tilt. Historians investigating the cause found original plans which had the name of the architect and the construction company cut out. They suspect the Mafia to be responsible as that group controls not only construction companies but picture postcard sales of the tower as well as every image of it on Getty or Shutterstock.
1923 - Bumblebees are forced to walk everywhere as calculations show they should not be able to fly.
1940 - Engineers fresh from building thrill rides at Coney Island and Palisades Park supervise the completion of their design of the Tacoma Narrows Bridge. They decide to spice up the trip for commuters, exceeding their best efforts at the aforementioned amusement parks. (pictured) The U.S. government would later enlist the engineers in the war effort by having them volunteer for tank and aircraft construction in Germany and Japan.
1989 - The Stone Roses band writes a song that says they "want to be a door".
2013 - The 2.2 mile (3.5 km) eastern section of the San Francisco-Oakland Bay Bridge is completed with a cost overrun of only US$6.25 billion. With all of its subsequent problems, the bridge section has now been slightly downgraded to allow 35 cars an hour in each direction, and will stand up to winds of up to 10 mph (16 kph) and earthquakes of 3 on the extended wimp scale. Engineers assure that it will withstand an asteroid impact on Jupiter. Resistance to kaiju attack has not been addressed.

Today's featured picture

St. Michael the Archangel attempts to slay Charles Darwin to prevent him from revealing Michael's horrible secret. Darwin, belonging to the fitter of the species, survived.

Image credit: Isra1337

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