Portal:Society
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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Society portal.
Explore the wondifferous world you live in! |
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Society only finds skinny people attractive, but is fat itself. Society doesn't like to stereotype people, except those damn Mexicans with their beans and rice. Society thinks foreigners should learn English before coming to America, but needs to find an English-speaker when it goes on vacation abroad. Society finds prison rape hilarious. Society believes America to be the greatest country on the motherfucking planet! Society preaches that gays should have equal rights... Just not in front of Society. Society knows that anyone who doesn't stand up during the Star-Spangled Banner is obviously a Communist. Society has no gender, yet seems to favor white, Christians . But trust us, Society's not biased or hypocritical at all.
Highlighted Article
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| A definitive guide to fortune-telling through fecal examination. |
As you are doubtlessly well aware, gypsies have been reading tea leaves for years with amazingly accurate results. Much like the reading of tea leaves, scatomancy studies the size, arrangement, color and interaction of bowel movements in the toilet bowl to predict secrets of the future and give guidance to major life decisions. Now, through the marvels of technology you can brush up on your ancient clairvoyant skills in the privacy of your very own commode! What will happen today? Is romance just around the corner? Will I get that promotion? All of these answers can truly come from “within yourself”....
| Archive | Article credit: Zana Dark | (more...) |
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Ben & Jerry's introduces a new flavor, designed to help you relax.
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Society in the News
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| Aww... |
SAN FRANCISCO, California -- Earlier today a heroic attempt was made by San Francisco Fire Fighters as they braved a burning building to save two kittens. The kittens were found unconscious in the living room, surrounded by flame and smoke when two daring fire fighters lifted the kittens, broke down the front door with an axe and rushed the kittens outside where paramedics successfully revived the kittens. On a related note, Grandma may still be inside the building.
The kittens made a full recovery and were soon back on their feet drinking milk from a bowl, which received an approving "Awww..." from everyone present. The kittens are indeed very cute, both are brown with blue eyes and have, according to one neighboring resident, "the cutest little kitty faces" she has ever seen. A combined effort was made to wash and dry the kittens to get the soot off of their fur which later turned out to be a success....
| Archive | Article credit: Raliter | (more...) |
Quote of the Week
“Philosophy is the phine art oph phucking the brain with phact-phree conjecture.”
- ~ Popular Belief on modern philosophy
Did you know...
- ...that walking is like running very slowly?
- ...that petting zoos are gonna get a whole lot more fun?
- ...that bad arguments are just as good as good ones? Because I said so?
- ...that in Russia, reversals reverse reversions?
- ...that anti-intellectualism be good?
- ...that the cheese growing between my toes needs a rebuttal as soon as possible?
- ...that it's over thataway?
- ...that God kills a kitten whenever someone reads an article on tired internet memes?
| ...Add to the list | (more...) |
Recent Articles in Society
HowTo:Write Colin Meloy Lyrics | Black sheep | Shit A Shitter Paradox | UnTunes:The Online Stalker Call from Grandma | Alternative Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous | Why?:You shouldn't take acid before riding a bicycle | High school: an essay by an old lonely man in a retirement home | Why?:Fight Club is a cop out? | Bad Directions | An Open Letter to the Cheese Growing in Between My Toes | Nursery | Tapheselachophobia | Let Someone Else Do It | Blacking Up | Dear Diary
Topics in Society
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