Portal:Religion
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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Religion portal.
By far the holiest portal you will ever find. |
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Religion is the act of worshipping a creed or deity in which one has mistakenly attributed supernatural powers. 'True Believers' are also known as schizophrenic or having a neurological disorder in scientific, medical, or sane circles. It was invented by tribal leaders at least 2 million years ago in order to control and financially exploit the citizenry and in the Western proper World was still going strong until the separation of Church and State. In the 3rd or improper World it's business as usual. Typically god is portrayed as a giant bearded dragon in the sky that flies around granting wishes, and invoking his wrath. But there are other variations.
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UnBooks:DIY and Carpentry Tips by Jesus Christ
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DIY and Carpentry Tips by Jesus Christ is the third book to be written by God and the second to be written by Him in His aspect of God the Son. Published in 2006, the book broke pre-sale records as millions of Christians pre-ordered copies hoping that it would continue the themes established in the previous two volumes, and potentially clarify matters that had been disputed by theologians for the last two millennia. However, many were disappointed to discover that the title was in no way allegorical in nature, and the book is almost wholly concerned with useful information on basic carpentry.
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If McGuyver were a Messiah, this move would convince all infidels of his holy power to kick ass.
Books and Other Media
UnBooks - UnBooks:The Nearly-Chaste Mormon's Guide to Quitting Masturbation
UnScripts - UnScripts:Genesis, Episode II: In the Garden of Eden
Unfomercials - Unfomercials:Religious Leader Trumps
Religion in the News
Quote of the Week
“Eh, it's fine, really. No big deal. I'm not offended.”
- ~ God on Apatheism
Did you know...
- ...that Buddhists have higher cancer rates than Eskimos?
- ...God is pissed off?
- ...that Religion is the longest running joke ever?
- ...that Jews souls are made out of bucky balls?
- ...Glenn Beck cries on television because he's a Mormon?
- ...Zoroaster drives Uhurus Mazda?
- ...Bahais have the best bud?
- ...good Muslims only get 61 virgins after taxes?
- ...Mayan prophesies predicted Quantum Computing?
- ...the Shinto religion encourages rabid badger juggling?
- ...that Jesus Christ really hated sand?
- ...that Buddah became overweight after his dad called him a Commercialist?
Spiritually Bankrupt Articles
'Til Eulenspiegel's merry pranks - Agnosticism - Bad Religion - Church of the Ironic Cheesecake.Inc - DinoJesus - Evil - Freedom of speech - God Hates Fags - Hezbollah (Humanitarian Movement) - Intelligent Falling - Jew Beanie - Karma - Lo Pan's Razor - Mugabetheism - Necrophilia - Shirley Phelps-Roper - Quakerism - Reformed Church of Alfredo - Sadism - The Hitchhiker's Guide To Uncyclopedia - Unintelligent Design - Virtue - What was God thinking!? - Xenu - You have two cows/19 -
ZephyrReligious Articles That Need Help
Adam - Baptism - Colloquialism - Duckism - Easter of the Living Dead - Faith - Godboost - Heresy - It takes a good Muslim to work out good Islamic jokes - Jainism - Kansas Board of Education - Martin Luther King Jr. - Mono - Neo-Confusionism - Original sin - Passion of the Christ - Quakers - Ramayana - Smart - The Midnight Sun - U2 - Veggiestrology - Whitism -
Zucchini