Portal:Religion

Portal:Religion

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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Religion portal. By far the holiest portal you will ever find.

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Religion is the act of worshipping a creed or deity in which one has mistakenly attributed supernatural powers. 'True Believers' are also known as schizophrenic or having a neurological disorder in scientific, medical, or sane circles. It was invented by tribal leaders at least 2 million years ago in order to control and financially exploit the citizenry and in the Western proper World was still going strong until the separation of Church and State. In the 3rd or improper World it's business as usual. Typically god is portrayed as a giant bearded dragon in the sky that flies around granting wishes, and invoking his wrath. But there are other variations.

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Highlighted Featured Article

Third Epistle to the Thessalonians

The Third Epistle to the Thessalonians, also known as the The Third Letter to the Thessalonians, is a purported letter from St. Paul to the community at Thessalonika. Unlike the first two epistles to the church, in which Paul expressed love and support to the Christians in the city while attempting to answer their questions, the apostle completely loses it in the third letter, and liberally sprinkles his escathology with insults like "doofus" and "morons."

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Highlighted Image

Jesus survived 40 days in the desert, thanks to his trusty automatic weapon.

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Books and Other Media

UnBooks - UnBooks:The Nearly-Chaste Mormon's Guide to Quitting Masturbation

UnScripts - UnScripts:Genesis, Episode II: In the Garden of Eden

Unfomercials - Unfomercials:Religious Leader Trumps

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Religion in the News

• UnNews:Westboro Baptist Church protests Uncyclopedia

• UnNews:Policeman sues force because 'he needed a bloody good shave'

• UnNews:God found alive, well and working on a much less ambitious project.

• UnNews:Police seek prophet in attempted herbicide

• UnNews:Couple goes to Kingdom Hall by mistake

• UnNews:Falwell starts campaign against God

• UnNews:Noah's ark to sail again

• UnNews:Man who claimed to have found God arrested for wasting police time

• UnNews:Satanic front group convenes in Vienna

• UnNews:Virgin Shark gives birth to Aquatic Messiah

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Quote of the Week

“It's the smart way to get out.”

~ Oscar Wilde on Jehovah witness protection program

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Did you know...

• ...that Buddhists have higher cancer rates than Eskimos?
• ...God is pissed off?
• ...that Religion is the longest running joke ever?
• ...that Jews souls are made out of bucky balls?
• ...Glenn Beck cries on television because he's a Mormon?
• ...Zoroaster drives Uhurus Mazda?
• ...Bahais have the best bud?
• ...good Muslims only get 61 virgins after taxes?
• ...Mayan prophesies predicted Quantum Computing?
• ...the Shinto religion encourages rabid badger juggling?
• ...that Jesus Christ really hated sand?
• ...that Buddah became overweight after his dad called him a Commercialist?

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Spiritually Bankrupt Articles

Religion

'Til Eulenspiegel's merry pranks - A proper Christian burial - Bibleman - Christian Right - Dashboard Confessional - Evil - First Communion - God v. Nietzsche - Hezbollah (Humanitarian Movement) - Intelligent Falling - Jesus theory - Klestosapharot - LaVeyan Vegetarianism - Miracles - Necrophilia - Pagan - Qu'ran - Requiem Republicam - Smeg - Totally Torah: Genesis - Unquotable:God - Virtue - Why?:Join a Satanic cult - XBible 360 - Yiddish -

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Religious Articles That Need Help

Atheist Doctrine - Brahmin - Church of Sony - Discalced Carmelites - Ed MacMahon - Freeslam - God: The Interviews - HowTo:Believe in ALLAH! - Intolerance - Jainism - Kansas Board of Education - Martin Luther King Jr. - Mosque - New atheism - Original sin - Protestant Reformation - Qu'ran Canker Sore 31 - Rapist - Splenda - Tsathoggua - United Church of Awesome - Veggiestrology - Whitism -

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