Blockbuster LLC
In 1972, The Video Rental Committee met to decide how to build their new rental store, designed to be a reliable, secure, moralistic, truthful business environment to exclusively aid the Western military and increase productivity -- a role which remained unchanged until 2013.
Universal started Blockbuster LLC. The major issue confronting management was what how it'd be run. Several options were considered. Early proposals revolved around electricity wires. These were superceded by the so-called "Dictator" proposal, in which one person would run until a suitable new idea was put into place, thus providing a high latency but high bandwidth system. Ultimately, however, a proposal was eventually found. Several "Geniuses" would show up at the "Counter". Solving the latency problems inherent in the "Dictator" proposal, it was immediately agreed upon. Starting in 1973, workers began laying the new management across Europe and North America. By 1989, Blockbuster LLC was already becoming the town square for the global village of tomorrow.[1]
Officially, Blockbuster was known as Block Whoops from 1972 to 1985.
The early Blockbuster LLC had a problem -- a problem that still existed until 2013. Blockbuster only sold VHSs instead of having a variety of different formats with different catagories.
Historical Claims[edit]
Many historians claim Blockbuster LLC was meant as a torture labratory.
Before Blockbuster[edit]
Before Blockbuster LLC, life was boring.
Population[edit]
50% 90s Kids, 50% Cofefe Voters.
Library[edit]
A typical Blockbuster section would have 1% of Porn and 99% of everything else.
Fandom[edit]
90s Kids[edit]
Blockbuster LLC is most remembered by 90s kids who hate everything from 2013 onwards.
This use of Blockbuster LLC is also one of the key events responsible for the Blockbuster Crisis of 1464 and again in 1775 when 21-year-old Mozart found a new Blockbuster store that was opening near him.
Nerds[edit]
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The AVGN has attempted to burn down a Blockbuster store in 2009. When he made the video, it was taken down and he got arrested. Other Nerds love Blockbuster though.
Geeks[edit]
Geeks are nerds but use Macs.
Obsessive Hunters[edit]
Another group obsessed with the history of the company are "Obsessive Hunters". These guys/gals like to find mysteries about what happened behind the scenes of Blockbusters.
Some of them are:
- CoolGuy69
- WeirdGuy69
- AnyGuy69
- Gals69
- Getiton69
- Anything69
Idiots[edit]
Many Idiots hate Blockbusters, claiming that it "Wasn't needed in the first place". Obviously, they're wrong.
Distribution[edit]
Blockbuster LLC had many forms of Distribution, such as their film studio DEJ Productions.
Facts you should know or you'll die[edit]
Blockbuster LLC destroyed all forms of DVD by 2002 and replaced it with a disguised VHS service to get rid of the Interwebz. But Blockbuster didn't know that the Internet was more powerful and the Intereligon destroyed Blockbuster in 2013.
The term "Rental Store" used to be used to describe Blockbuster LLC when it was just a cute baby and had nothing but VHS tapes without disaster. However, because of the infamous Collapse of the Rental Stock Market in 1986, this term is now very unpopular. But people still use it though 32 years later.
The Fall/Rise and Future of Blockbuster[edit]
In 2001, Blockbuster LLC was acquired by Netflix and eventually closed all stores by 2013. During that time, however, Blockbuster particularly saw a rise in 2003 when it grossed over 150 gazillion net worth. Netflix eventually killed itself and in 2030, Blockbuster LLC was revived with 1 store in Timmy's house.
Quotes[edit]
“The Internet owns 17% of Blockbuster LLC, the Nostalgia Critic owns 2%, 1% is owned by commercial business, and 160% is owned by Video-Tapes”
“Idiot! That's more than 100!”
"I know, I don't care!"
"Why don't we just take the oil?" - Donald Trump
"From Germany?" - Winston Churchill
Death[edit]
Although initially a highly successful venture, things took a turn for the worst in 1464. A Blockbuster store was running happily, when a Dinosaur crashed into the store and demanded that all the tapes belong to him. Management refused, and several days later, a powerful Apatosaurus stole all Video Tapes, Video Games, other Video Stuff, and anything else the Blockbuster sold. This catastrophic event is known as the Blockbuster Crisis of 1464.
Carolco[edit]
Carolco is an extremely well-known Film Studio, It is known to produce Terminator movies and get Arnold to do them (by possibly bribing him). Their current whereabouts are unknown, but they seems to like hanging out in a small secluded cave. They also Founded Viacom in 1066. Early Business with Viacom didn't work out so well, as they became a recluse and vowed never to leave the V of Doom. in about 1085, their history would change forever, after it finally decided to leave the V of Doom, they found some money buried in some snow, bought a Bugs Bunny, found the golden ticket... and the rest as they say is history... But, that's not the end of his adventure, oh no, After a calendar date accident, they found themselves in 1988 where they spent the rest of their film life and forced Arnold to be the Terminator. Some say Carolco died in 1994, but this is untrue.
References[edit]
See also[edit]
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