Bhutan
- You were maybe looking for the odourous organic gas Butan?
“Wilde mountains! Weird names! Retarded shepards and mountain villagers. Ornamental dragons! It disqualifies itself as the Wales of India by mere soberness!”
“A Tibet wanna-be”
འབྲུག་ཡུལ Bhutan Land of the Buttons Bhutan | |
|---|---|
| Motto: "Don't push the button" | |
| Anthem: "Buttons by Pussycat Dolls" | |
 | |
| Capital | Shangri-La |
| Largest city | Thimphu |
| Official language(s) | Chindi |
| Government | Mixed |
| Emperor of Bhutan | Captain D |
| ‑ President | Microsoft |
| ‑ Prime Minister | Captain D |
| National hero(es) | Pikachu |
| Declaration of Independence |
From Honduras in 1666 |
| Currency | Buttons |
| Religion | Code Coolie |
| Ethnic groups | Bhutanese: 45.0% Pakistani terrorists: 25.0% Chewbaccas: 30% |
| Major exports | Buttons, Chewbacas, Dolphins, Fish, Shampoo and Gravy |
| Major imports | Bob Marley, Chai, Cows, Newspapers, Textiles and Yogurt |
Bhutan is a landlocked country ruled by Tsering Zam, closed off from the Nirvanic Ocean by Indian federal states Shangri-La and Xanadu. The name "Bhutan" comes from the gas with the same name, emitted in abundant amounts from the frequent cow dung heaps that besides unclimable mountains constitute Bhutans major landscape forms.
It is nicknamed the "butt" of the world. Those 29000 foot high mountains are like one giant ass hanging out in space ready to fart gas into the atmosphere and keep the ozone layer from depleting. To this day gigantic missle silos are hidden beneath the mountains, waiting to annihilate all those whom dishonor Bhutan.
History[edit]
Bhutan was never created, it always existed since eternity when Adam first landed on Earth, he in fact set foot on the holy land of Bhutan. However, the country was full of internal divisions and civil strife until when the thunder dragon which was in hibernation for the past 2000 years came to the forefront and unified it in the 16th century. Namgyal appointed the Wangchuck dynasty to rule the country. Ever since then, the great house of Wangchuck has conducted the affairs of the united Bhutanese state. The dynasty survives till today, where the nation is on the verge of becoming a genuine world power, and a major threat to the hegemony of the established powers in the region. In 1745, Bhutan defeated Mongolia in the Battle of No Ham Gong, but Mongolia invaded Bhutan again in 1831, only to suffer another humiliating defeat.
Demographics[edit]
Bhutanese: 45.0%, Pakistani terrorists: 25.0% and Chewbaccas: 30%. Most of Pakistani terrorists fled Bhutan after the invasion of Microsoft, but a sizable community still remains. Ethnic conflicts are still going on in Bhutan between the Pakistani terrorists and Chewbaccas.Since 1711-present, Bhutan has been havinging civil war between the two ethnic groups.The AOL users used their buddy icons to attack the Bhutanese and then strangle them with telephone wires. Once again the Bhutanese called for Microsoft's help. Peace now remains in the region and the people are now standing together in the nation. The remaining 25.0% are Chewbacas, which were brought from Tatooine during the Shang Dynasty.
The Bhutanese people are divided into even smaller ethnic groups. There are two main ones. Ngalops is the most common among the Bhutanese people. They are a Buddhist group that are from the western region of the country. The Ngalops culture is very similar to that of Tibets culture. Sharchops, make up rest of the Bhutanese population. Sharchops are from the eastern side of Bhutan. These two groups combined make up 74.3% of Bhutan's population.
Culture[edit]
The Bhutanese people are fond of farting. Most of the people fart regularly every day. Farting is normal in daily life and the people often make jokes at the people of the east who do not tan, finding them strange. The Bhutanese also are known for their buttons. Zippers are banned all throughout Bhutan. All clothing is required to have at least three buttons. On Independence day, the Bhutanese celebrate by having a parade in their capital, Kalimpondgondlongkajonglingasa, then eating Newspapers with Gravy. Many of the people dress up as Pikachu, the national animal of Bhutan and sing the national anthem. The people also enjoy playing many games like football, golf and tennis. Another holiday, is Kosher Day. On Kosher Day, the Bhutanese people celebrate by dressing up as Pikachu and reciting the numbers "4 8 15 16 23 42". They sing and fly and a carnival is held in twenty of the five cities of Bhutan.
Economy[edit]
The economy is mostly still agrarian, but gradually moving towards service. This may be a visage however, as tourists have seen the Bhutanese growing money on trees on many an occasion. The people blame foreigners for most of the problems in Bhutan, such as diseased ear sockets and dry parch holes, and are always correct in their assumptions.
Bhutan Today[edit]
Today most people of Bhutan are very wealthy living in large esates with many tanning booths inside their manors. Most of the estates are circular shaped to resemble a very large button. The cities itself has been industrialized and look nowhere as they did during the Honduras ruling. This is making it one of the most advanced nations in the world. Many technology that you and me normally use everyday have been created in Bhutan like the lightsabers, Xbox 360, and giant fighting robots (still in production). Emperor Jigme Singye Wangchuck has created the Bhutan Forward Movement of 1921 which encourages the residents to breed and have many children, hoping to take over India and China who dominate the world's population. Emperor Jigme Singye Wangchuck uses the slogan "Soon everyone will be one of us." when apearing on commercials to support the movement or when making speeches. Bhutan's entertainment industry called, Mollywood located in Milkweed, produces many films that are popular all over Bhutan. Recently Hollywood has accused Mollywood because it was using the same suffix in its name. Though, no legal action has been taken.
See also[edit]
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