Category:Microsoft
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And in a time of great fear and some rain the beardy Prophet came down the mountains and spoke upon his children:
- Microsoft is sometimes misunderstood as an IT company. They advertise for operating systems and office software along other things mainly used on servers. But truth is they have shipped mindbogglingly complicated software which have connectors to your brains endorphinic productions. At the very same second you use a Microsoft product, you start to smile all over your face, your pupils are getting wide in a fraction of a millisecond. It has accessed your brain, it nuzzles in your thoughts, pinches your cortex, makes you feel very very fuzzy and warm. This is all fake. This is the beginning of a worldwide start of Microsoft to command all users to just smile and buy another Microsoft product. This brainwashing is strongly supported by the wearing of a tie and chaps.
- The only purpose of Microsoft is the obtainment of world domination.
- Say prayers to his noodelyness to prevent this scenario, the end of all times.
Said so, turned around and went away. Ramen.
The ISIS of the technological world.
- Detect "non-genuine" products
- Gather user information and credit card numbers
- Cripple core system components
- Deploy legal team
- Launch civil litigation
Estimated time remaining:
Forever, or if you give me a cookie, I might shorten it to an hour.
Installing Windows has never been easiereasy
All you need to do is phone your local Microsoft Customer Representative, write down a very long set of numbers, type it all in, get an error message, phone our Customer Representative again, adjust a few things, get another very long set of numbers, type it all in again, install a few drivers, activate Windows again, lather, rinse and repeat.
Related technology:
- Apple
- MS-UNO
- MS-DOS
- .NET
- Blue Screen of Death
- Calculator
- CTRL-ALT-DEL
- DirectX
- Hotmail
- Internet Explorer
- UnNews: Microsoft unveils Internet Genuine Advantage
- Microsoft Products Online Technical Support
- Microsoft Access
- Microsoft Keyboard
- Microsoft Office
- Microsoft Outlook
- Microsoft Surface
- MS Paint
- PowerPoint
- MS Word
- Microsoft Word Paperclip
- Minesweeper
- MSNBC
- Notepad
- Registry Editor
- Total Fucking Asshole Server 2006
- Microsoft Immortal Life Support System
- Task Manager
- Windows X-Console
Windows Product line:
Subcategories
This category has the following 4 subcategories, out of 4 total.
B
C
D
M
Pages in category "Microsoft"
The following 128 pages are in this category, out of 128 total.
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M
- Microshaft Winblows 98
- Microsoft
- Microsoft Access
- Microsoft Keyboard
- Microsoft Office
- Microsoft Office source code
- Microsoft Products Online Technical Support
- Microsoft Surface
- Microsoft Windows
- Microsoft Word Paperclip
- UnNews:Microsoft Zune a billion times better than iPod
- Game:Minesweeper
- Peter Moore
- User:Mr. Briggs Inc./Fringe Market
- MS Calculator
- MS Paint
- MS Word
- MS-DOS
- MSN
- MSN Messenger's Guide to Manners, Proper Behavior and Slapstick
N
R
S
T
W
- War on Microsoft
- Forum:WinCruft: Not just another maintenance issue
- Windex
- Windows 1.0
- Windows 10
- Windows 11
- Windows 2000
- Windows 2010
- Windows 3.0
- Windows 3.1
- Windows 7
- Windows 8
- Windows 9
- Windows 95
- Windows 98
- Windows BC
- Windows Cinema
- Windows Error
- Windows Error Edition
- Windows for Politicians
- Windows Jesus
- Windows key
- Windows Me
- Windows NT
- Windows Server 2003
- Windows Task Manager
- Windows TNT
- Windows Vista
- Windows Vista (Communist article)
- Windows Vista Pirated Edition
- Windows X-Console
- Windows XP
- Windows You
📰
- UnNews:Apple to get its own OoOQTF document format
- UnNews:AVG Antivirus detects Microsoft Windows as a Virus
- UnNews:Ballmer and Gates Children caught using Linux and Macs
- UnNews:Bill Gates criticized over name change
- UnNews:Bill Gates stars in a commercial about nothing
- UnNews:Communists buy Microsoft
- UnNews:EU bitch-slaps Microsoft
- UnNews:EU continues to defy Microsoft, use Firefox
- UnNews:Former Nokia CEO leaving Microsoft
- UnNews:Microsoft announces a new-old Operating System
- UnNews:Microsoft buys Switzerland
- UnNews:Microsoft CEO gets bad karma
- UnNews:Microsoft declares war on Macintosh
- UnNews:Microsoft delays Internet Explorer 12
- UnNews:Microsoft developing Windows for phone chips
- UnNews:Microsoft develops immortal computing
- UnNews:Microsoft releases long-awaited IE6 for Mac
- UnNews:Microsoft secures "Xbone.com" domain name
- UnNews:Microsoft to buy Yoohoo chocolate drink company
- UnNews:Microsoft to hire autistic workers
- UnNews:News Corp makes a deal with Microsoft to delist Fox News et al links from Google
- UnNews:Next US election to be called "2020"
- UnNews:US asks Microsoft exec to gum up tax code
- UnNews:Windows 10 will include glasses and fake nose
- UnNews:Windows 8 baffles users; but, screw 'em!
- UnNews:Windows Vista doesn't work!
- UnNews:Windows Vista not to natively support protected mode
- UnNews:Windows XP becomes suddenly useless
Media in category "Microsoft"
The following 19 files are in this category, out of 19 total.
- Arduino.jpg 474 × 266; 35 KB
- Document2.jpg 800 × 600; 103 KB
- Error messages.gif 641 × 225; 129 KB
- Microsoft building 17 front door.jpg 320 × 240; 8 KB
- Microsoft logo white.gif 171 × 28; 2 KB
- Microsoft-logo.jpg 640 × 446; 11 KB
- Ms kb background base.PNG 800 × 198; 877 bytes
- Ms kb background sides.PNG 10 × 198; 304 bytes
- Ms kb background.PNG 800 × 95; 429 bytes
- Ms kb nav bar divider.gif 3 × 27; 137 bytes
- Ms kb rounded corner bottom left.gif 6 × 6; 72 bytes
- Ms kb rounded corner bottom right.gif 6 × 6; 72 bytes
- Ms kb rounded corner top left.gif 6 × 6; 89 bytes
- Ms kb rounded corner top right.gif 6 × 6; 89 bytes
- Ms kb rounded corners.gif 12 × 12; 117 bytes
- Office1900.jpg 640 × 302; 34 KB
- SprayMSPaint.jpg 200 × 150; 5 KB
- Windows XP Virus Edition.jpg 1,920 × 1,080; 54 KB
- Windows-chess.png 1,024 × 1,294; 221 KB