Jordan

For other uses, see Jordan (disambiguation).

Jordan Jordan Jordan
Flag Coat of Arms
Motto: "We have the best detergents for your dirty money..."
Anthem: "Jordan" by buckethead
Translation: " Da Fuck are you looking at?"
Capital	Amman
Largest city	Tel Aviv
Official language(s)	Jordanian
Government	Monarch Dictatorship
His Royal Majesty	Queen Rania
National hero(es)	Terrorists, such as Zarqawi, Michael Jordan
Currency	US Dollars
Religion	Christianity(1%),Moderate Islam(0.0001%), Baha'ai (0.1%), Kim Kardashian Pussy Worshippers (5%), ISIS Islam (89.3%)
Major exports	Manpower esp to Gulf Countries , Rent-A-Army, Terrorists to Syria, Iraq, and Michael Jordan.
Major imports	Sand, Morrocan Whores, international loans
Hours of  operation	7-18

Jordan is a country in the middle of the Middle East, mainly created by Queen Elizabeth boys for the seldom purpose of protecting their Cousins from any potential threat by neighboring countries. Regardless of the fact that they are one of the biggest pro- Allies in the region, they are still a fertile environment for Terrorist groups such as ISIS with a general racist, anti-Semitic, homophobic notion being a huge attraction for such groups.

Trivia about Jordan

• Jordan is the only country in the world that was named over an NBA superstar

• Talk in the media over territorial disputes over the West Bank and East Bank were settled, Peter Andre and Alex Reid both said there was no argument over the twin pinnacles, Katie Price is now known as The Levant, to recognise her expanded roles and planning permission is being sought for further erections.

Modern history

Michael Jordan bought the decent country after winning his 9th championship with the L.A Clippers, and appointed His Royal Majesty King Hussein - AKA Mr. Beef- as his heir apparent

After his final retirement he was assassinated by Sir Charles, which made Mr. Beef the new MVP - Sorry King - of Jordan.

Mr. Beef Managed to balance things well between being a CIA officer and an "Arabic Islamic Hero" to his People

Mr. Beef Unfortunately passed away at the age of 369 after being misdiagnosed with a STD rather than terminal cancer which advanced him to the second round .

Agriculture

Since the extinction of foxes (except the surprisingly intelligent artist fox that dwells in the icy wastes of Mauritania) in 1972, the sole purpose of farming has been to supply unspecified sheep parts to the aristocracy of Jordan, where they are considered a delicacy. (See: Farming)

Tourists in Jordan

• 

  "Welcome to Betra, I will guide you for a cigarette or a bottle of whisky ,or a blow-job"

• 

  tourists being insulted by Jordanian people, covered in Unidentified brown substance

• 

  a Jordanian Gentleman helping a Swedish Tourist ride his horse

• 

  a rare footage of a terrorist attack on Aqaba by an explosive boat

• Backpackers should be wary in Downtown where Angelina Jolie (president of Malaysia/ professional whale masseur) is often seen wondering around the 1st circle, looking for babies to adopt and name ridicuously, whilst screaming "f@#k you, Aniston!"

• Tourists can enjoy local delicacies, served in quaint restaurants such as Popeyes, Burger King and KFC. Although popular, the forementioned eateries are staffed by dishevlled "mashnoon" and as a result, these eateries often resemble scenes from Jurassic Park. Therefore, encounters with these places are delicious but can deadly, as hungry families waiting for their orders have been known to eat the customers around them.

Other meanings

Jordan is also a river in Israel, and there's not much to say about that, except that its real name is Katie Price and it's married to a cage fighter.

Jordan is also a type of sugar-coated almond-based confection only found in movie theaters. This last type of Jordan is, on a pound-for-pound basis, more valuable than uranium.

Jordan is also a song that Buckethead composed to spite all those who make fun of his bucket. After he finished it, no one was left standing for all the heads in the audience had imploded.