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St. Pierre and Michelob (technically, the Territorial Collectivity of Saint Pierre et Michelob; French: Collectivité territoriale de Saint-Pierre-et-Michelob), is an archipelago of small islands off the coast of eastern Canada, the main islands being St. Pierre and Michelob, south of the Canadian province of Newfoundland and Labatt. The islands come within 10 km of Newfoundland.
Within France, the archipelago has the status of "territorial collectivity" because it sounds more dignified than "neglected islands". Its residents are French citizens; they elect one Deputy to the National Assembly — though, in view of the territory's population (6,008 as of the 2016 census, which was thereafter disbanded), he is only allowed to vote on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. They are also allowed to hold opinions on Senator and President.
St. Pierre and Michelob is all that is left of the once-sprawling North American empire of "New France". (Quebec aspires to the same status, but every time Parisians hear that accent, they are glad they cut them loose.) Acadia broke ties with the territory when it became evident that the islanders were even lazier and more cowardly than the Acadians. It is notable for being France's only remaining possession in North America, and if France washes its hands too, it will not have any notability. (more...)
Previously featured article – Minotaur
The Minotaur was a half-human, half-bull creature in Greek mythology. Rather than a domestic cow, the bovine parent was an auroch, now extinct, as opposed to an auror, which is hoped to be extinct. The tale is probably a manifestation of man’s historic fascination with cow sex. The odd combination of species stands as proof of Creationism, though not by the usual expected deity. (more...)
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| Did you know...
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*... that the phrase "¡Ay Chihuahua!" can be used to mean both "no, I don't have any bathtub cheese" and "yes, I have a great deal of bathtub cheese"?
- ... that the rumors that you are paranoid were started by someone who's out to get you?
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| Word of the Day
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procrastination Try to use it in conversation. Knowledge is power.
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| In the news
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| On this day...
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December 20: Oh yeah?! You Goin' Down! Day (New Jersey), Blueberry Harvest Season officially ends (pictured, you missed it)
- 4,000,000 BCE - Trash talking is invented by caveman. First insult is "samallhuuuuell1!!" (I'm a kick the shit out of yo potatoes!!)
- 1727 - Isaac Newton, his mind addled by the chemicals he works with, invents splunge and splunge theory. Rediscovered centuries later, scientists determine that the theory is indeed valid, but only if we lived on a bizarro world.
- 1800 - Evidence comes to light that The Battle of Gillygillyossenfefferkatzenellenbogen-by-the-sea actually took place just outside Gillygillyossenfefferkatzenellenbogen-by-the-sea.
- 1803 - Napoleon annexes St. Louisiana, taking it over from the America. He defends it by making a pact with the unpredictable Llama Jesus, now proven to be very much alive and roaming the swamps around Florida.
- 1860 - South Carolina secedes from the United States, marking the official end of the Blueberry Harvest Festival. It also coincidentally leads to the American Civil War.
- 1931 - Terrell Owens, Godzilla, Crazy Frog, Vanilla Ice, Millard Fillmore, and Vin Diesel form The Legion of Doom, and celebrate by stealing a bike.
- 1973 - Frazier goes down!; he goes down to the corner to order a pizza and a couple of beers.
- 1977 - Kitten huffing is deemed a breach of human rights. Coatimundi huffing becomes the new thing.
- 1982 - American-Welsh War of 1982 begins in Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwyll-llantysiliogogogoch.
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| Today's featured picture
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The M822 Hand Grenade is an explosive device that resembles a hand. On activation, the device lunges towards the nearest throat or throat-like object and latches on tight with its five "fingers" exploding violently in a gruesome mess. Special care must be taken when activating the grenade. When activated, one should run behind the nearest wall or bush and squat down, so that the grenade cannot "see" you.
Photo credit: Mosquitopsu
Archive - Nominate new image
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| Writer and Noob of the Month
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GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!
Seriously, we love you.
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.
Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!
HEIL FROSTY!
Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners
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