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St. Pierre and Michelob (technically, the Territorial Collectivity of Saint Pierre et Michelob; French: Collectivité territoriale de Saint-Pierre-et-Michelob), is an archipelago of small islands off the coast of eastern Canada, the main islands being St. Pierre and Michelob, south of the Canadian province of Newfoundland and Labatt. The islands come within 10 km of Newfoundland.
Within France, the archipelago has the status of "territorial collectivity" because it sounds more dignified than "neglected islands". Its residents are French citizens; they elect one Deputy to the National Assembly — though, in view of the territory's population (6,008 as of the 2016 census, which was thereafter disbanded), he is only allowed to vote on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. They are also allowed to hold opinions on Senator and President.
St. Pierre and Michelob is all that is left of the once-sprawling North American empire of "New France". (Quebec aspires to the same status, but every time Parisians hear that accent, they are glad they cut them loose.) Acadia broke ties with the territory when it became evident that the islanders were even lazier and more cowardly than the Acadians. It is notable for being France's only remaining possession in North America, and if France washes its hands too, it will not have any notability. (more...)
Previously featured article – Minotaur
The Minotaur was a half-human, half-bull creature in Greek mythology. Rather than a domestic cow, the bovine parent was an auroch, now extinct, as opposed to an auror, which is hoped to be extinct. The tale is probably a manifestation of man’s historic fascination with cow sex. The odd combination of species stands as proof of Creationism, though not by the usual expected deity. (more...)
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Idday ouyay owknay...
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- ... that in another time and place Rod Serling existed as a discarded cardboard cutout on the set of the Twilight Zone? (pictured)
- ... that paper beats rock, but guns beat everything?
- ... that I like cats, but could never eat a whole one?
- ... that you need to stop reading this page and get a job?
- ... that Alexander the Great would ride his horse in front of his troops before battle, so they would be so mad at having to march in horseshit they would be ready to fight anything and everything?
- ... that the answer is Colonel Mustard in the drawing room with a candlestick?
- ... in just one week you can learn the complete lyrics to the 1960s song Batman?
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In the news
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Onay isthay ayday...
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December 26: Packaging Day, Useless Office Memorandum Day, International Go to the Pub all Afternoon and Have a Row With the Missus Day
- The 3rd day of creation - God creates the useless memorandum.
- 0 - Rudolph catches everlasting cold after night out; he is condemned to a permanent red nose.
- 17 CE - Jesus recovers from a 'wicked birthday hangover' and cleans up the house before his parents get home.
- 35 - Stephen the Protomartyr gets stoned off his ass.
- 931 - Good King Wenceslas looked out, on the Feast of Stephen; when the snow lay round about, deep and crisp and even. King Wenceslas then remembers that Stephen really, really likes snowcones.
- 1991 - The USSR trips on a banana peel and falls down. This marked the end of the communist regime, but Gorbachev's birth mark (wine stain) remained.
- 2002 - Last recorded vowel movement for God. In an indirect response to this anniversary, God decides to take out His frustration on His rich children every year after-wizard.
- 2003 - There is devastating spongecake in Ham because they own too many fairy cakes, and Bob makes them play.
- 2004 - Realising he has nothing to bitch about, Bob Geldof creates a devastating tsunami.
- 2004 - There is devastating toffee in Southeast Asia because they own too many fudges, and Bob makes them play.
- 2004 - The idea for Deal or No Deal is created on Boxing Day after Noel Edmonds is trapped in a box, the producer of the show opening it and gasping, thinking 'Hey, why don't we do that with something valuable in the boxes?'
- 2008 - Mars is destroyed because the Bible has no recorded evidence of Martians, and God makes it pay.
- 2011 - A devastating white hole wipes out God, leaving no one to make no one pay.
- 6325 - Despite the discovery of the lost pelvis of Richard Belzer, our world still sucks.
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Oday'stay eaturedfay icturepay
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| LandoftheJews.png - 5 total votes ( 5 / 0 )
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Land of the Jews, based on promo poster for George A. Romero's film Land of the Dead.
Image credit: RabbiTechno
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GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!
Seriously, we love you.
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.
Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!
HEIL FROSTY!
Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners
You only have 5 (Five) more days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month, GET VOTING!!
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