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St. Pierre and Michelob (technically, the Territorial Collectivity of Saint Pierre et Michelob; French: Collectivité territoriale de Saint-Pierre-et-Michelob), is an archipelago of small islands off the coast of eastern Canada, the main islands being St. Pierre and Michelob, south of the Canadian province of Newfoundland and Labatt. The islands come within 10 km of Newfoundland.
Within France, the archipelago has the status of "territorial collectivity" because it sounds more dignified than "neglected islands". Its residents are French citizens; they elect one Deputy to the National Assembly — though, in view of the territory's population (6,008 as of the 2016 census, which was thereafter disbanded), he is only allowed to vote on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. They are also allowed to hold opinions on Senator and President.
St. Pierre and Michelob is all that is left of the once-sprawling North American empire of "New France". (Quebec aspires to the same status, but every time Parisians hear that accent, they are glad they cut them loose.) Acadia broke ties with the territory when it became evident that the islanders were even lazier and more cowardly than the Acadians. It is notable for being France's only remaining possession in North America, and if France washes its hands too, it will not have any notability. (more...)
Previously featured article – Minotaur
The Minotaur was a half-human, half-bull creature in Greek mythology. Rather than a domestic cow, the bovine parent was an auroch, now extinct, as opposed to an auror, which is hoped to be extinct. The tale is probably a manifestation of man’s historic fascination with cow sex. The odd combination of species stands as proof of Creationism, though not by the usual expected deity. (more...)
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| On this day...
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Santa, the source of all iguana ailments.
November 15: Awareness in Iguanas Awareness Week begins
- 438 - Saint Patrick drives the snakes from Ireland. Iguanas are only offered bus vouchers.
- 1491 - Christopher Columbus arrives at the New World, only to be told that he is a year early.
- 1533 - Francisco Pizarro arrives in Cuzco, Peru. He notices that the iguanas have unusually piercing stares but firm, lovely bodies.
- 1853 - Deep in the Amazon, Brazilian missionaries discover the phrase, "Cogito, ergo sum" scraped onto a tree, apparently by the claws of some medium-sized reptile.
- 1888 - Iguana hoagies, foot-long sandwiches on a roll, become briefly popular. It is later found that people in most other places cook the iguana first.
- 1964 - Mary Poppins donates a spoonful of sugar and the handsome sum of 21 guineas to the Arthritic Iguana Foundation after her beloved pet Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious dies screaming horribly from Mad Iguana Disorder, a disease closely related to Arthritic Iguana Ailment.
- 1969 - Vietnam War: In Washington, D.C., 250,000-500,000 iguanas stage a peaceful demonstration against the war.
- 1990 - Producers acknowledge that Milli Vanilli, who won the 1990 "Best New Artist" Grammy Award, did not sing on their album. Vocals were sung by a couple of iguanas with vocoders.
- 2001 - Microsoft releases the Xbox. The most popular game is Hi/Lo, a cooking game starring a cyborg known only as the "Master Chef". It is set in a futuristic spaceship and challenges the player to serve up meals for an entire ship, sometimes using alien cooking implements. The game is regarded as a classic in the "First Person Cooker" genre.
- 2006 - Santa continues to plot total world domination.
- 2016 - 84% of Americans suffer from thumb arthritis due to excessive use of the text message. JubJub, the first reptilian virtuous assistant, proves to be extremely popular despite problems with Salmonella transmission.
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| Writer and Noob of the Month
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GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!
Seriously, we love you.
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.
Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!
HEIL FROSTY!
Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners
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