From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation
Jump to search
The 10th edition of the Poo Lit Surprise writing competition is now open for submissions.
Somebody touch me.
St. Pierre and Michelob (technically, the Territorial Collectivity of Saint Pierre et Michelob; French: Collectivité territoriale de Saint-Pierre-et-Michelob), is an archipelago of small islands off the coast of eastern Canada, the main islands being St. Pierre and Michelob, south of the Canadian province of Newfoundland and Labatt. The islands come within 10 km of Newfoundland.
Within France, the archipelago has the status of "territorial collectivity" because it sounds more dignified than "neglected islands". Its residents are French citizens; they elect one Deputy to the National Assembly — though, in view of the territory's population (6,008 as of the 2016 census, which was thereafter disbanded), he is only allowed to vote on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. They are also allowed to hold opinions on Senator and President.
St. Pierre and Michelob is all that is left of the once-sprawling North American empire of "New France". (Quebec aspires to the same status, but every time Parisians hear that accent, they are glad they cut them loose.) Acadia broke ties with the territory when it became evident that the islanders were even lazier and more cowardly than the Acadians. It is notable for being France's only remaining possession in North America, and if France washes its hands too, it will not have any notability. (more...)
Previously featured article – Minotaur
The Minotaur was a half-human, half-bull creature in Greek mythology. Rather than a domestic cow, the bovine parent was an auroch, now extinct, as opposed to an auror, which is hoped to be extinct. The tale is probably a manifestation of man’s historic fascination with cow sex. The odd combination of species stands as proof of Creationism, though not by the usual expected deity. (more...)
|
Did you know...
|
*... that oxygen is a highly addictive drug, with 100% of all users becoming addicted with their first hit?
- ... The Rapture came and went and left behind everyone except for six people and an aardvark?
- ... that oxygen is a highly addictive drug, with 100% of all users becoming addicted with their first hit?
- ... The Rapture came and went and left behind everyone except for six people and an aardvark?
- ... that oxygen is a highly addictive drug, with 100% of all users becoming addicted with their first hit?
- ... The Rapture came and went and left behind everyone except for six people and an aardvark?
- ... that oxygen is a highly addictive drug, with 100% of all users becoming addicted with their first hit?
|
|
In the news
|
|
|
On this day...
|
November 17: Björksmas (Iceland).
- 1558 - Elizabethan era begins: Queen Mary I of England dies and is succeeded by her half-sister Elizabeth XP.
- 1796 - Napoleonic Wars, Battle of Arcole: French forces defeat the Austrians in Italy. Despite the victory, French forces surrender 15 minute later, citing "force of habit".
- 1863 - Siege of Knoxville begins: Confederate forces led by General James Longstreet place Johnny Knoxville under siege; Steve-O manages to escape in a daring skateboard stunt.
- 1871 - The NRA is granted a charter by the state of New York, they celebrate by accidentally shooting people.
- 1903 - The Russian Social Democratic Labor Party splits into two groups; the Bolsheviks (Russian for "majority") and Milkshakes (Russian for "minority"). (NOTE: Later the Milkshakes became the majority party, meaning that technically the Milkshakes became the bolsheviks and the Bolsheviks milkshakes).
- 1967 - Vietnam War: Acting on optimistic reports he was given on November 13, US President Lyndon B. Johnson tells his nation that, while much remained to be done, "We are inflicting greater losses than we're taking... we are making progress." Johnson goes on to say that after he wins in Vietnam, he will attempt to bring law and order to Afghanistan, impose democracy on Iraq, and stage a winter assault on Moscow.
- 1969 - Negotiators from the Soviet Union and the United States meet in Helsinki to begin SALT I negotiations aimed at limiting the amount of sodium in fast food.
- 1970 - The Soviet Union lands the probe Lunokhod 1 on Mare Inebrium (Sea of Rains) on the Moon. NASA says that it's the first roving remote-controlled robot to land on another world. But then again, they also say that we can't live on the sun.
- 1970 - Douglas Engelbart receives the patent for the first computer mouse. The revolutionary invention will allow men to search for porn with only one hand.
- 1973 - In Orlando, Florida, US President Richard Nixon tells 400 Associated Press managing editors "I am not a crook". Moments later he swipes one of their wallets.
- 2006 -The Playstation 3 is released in America at $599. 200 will later be chained together and used to crack SSL authentication, with more added in later years to form the kernel of Skynet.
|
|
Featured picture
|
[vote]
| Ball pool.jpg - 9 Toys for George Bush ( 18 / 9 )
|
|
George W. Bush, shown searching for 'Iraqian' WMDs during playtime at the White House.
Image credit: Strange but untrue
|
|
|
|
|
Writer and Noob of the Month
|
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!
Seriously, we love you.
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.
Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!
HEIL FROSTY!
Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners
|
|
Uncyclopedia's sista projects
Uncyclopedia is an independent humor writing project, a non-profitable cabal that also hosts a range of other projects.
Uncyclopedia languages
This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains
37,360 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many
languages:
Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and an elite clan of Clinjas.
Main Page
The 10th edition of the Poo Lit Surprise writing competition is now open for submissions. 
