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The 10th edition of the Poo Lit Surprise writing competition is now open for submissions.
Somebody touch me.
St. Pierre and Michelob (technically, the Territorial Collectivity of Saint Pierre et Michelob; French: Collectivité territoriale de Saint-Pierre-et-Michelob), is an archipelago of small islands off the coast of eastern Canada, the main islands being St. Pierre and Michelob, south of the Canadian province of Newfoundland and Labatt. The islands come within 10 km of Newfoundland.
Within France, the archipelago has the status of "territorial collectivity" because it sounds more dignified than "neglected islands". Its residents are French citizens; they elect one Deputy to the National Assembly — though, in view of the territory's population (6,008 as of the 2016 census, which was thereafter disbanded), he is only allowed to vote on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. They are also allowed to hold opinions on Senator and President.
St. Pierre and Michelob is all that is left of the once-sprawling North American empire of "New France". (Quebec aspires to the same status, but every time Parisians hear that accent, they are glad they cut them loose.) Acadia broke ties with the territory when it became evident that the islanders were even lazier and more cowardly than the Acadians. It is notable for being France's only remaining possession in North America, and if France washes its hands too, it will not have any notability. (more...)
Previously featured article – Minotaur
The Minotaur was a half-human, half-bull creature in Greek mythology. Rather than a domestic cow, the bovine parent was an auroch, now extinct, as opposed to an auror, which is hoped to be extinct. The tale is probably a manifestation of man’s historic fascination with cow sex. The odd combination of species stands as proof of Creationism, though not by the usual expected deity. (more...)
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Did you know...
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*... the US Postal Service delivered over 7.7 billion pieces of mail last year?
- ... and that unfortunately those started out as 5.2 billion packages and letters?
- ... that at some point, hanging in there just makes you look like an even bigger loser?
- ... the US Postal Service delivered over 7.7 billion pieces of mail last year?
- ... and that unfortunately those started out as 5.2 billion packages and letters?
- ... that at some point, hanging in there just makes you look like an even bigger loser?
- ... the US Postal Service delivered over 7.7 billion pieces of mail last year?
- ... and that unfortunately those started out as 5.2 billion packages and letters?
- ... that at some point, hanging in there just makes you look like an even bigger loser?
- ... the US Postal Service delivered over 7.7 billion pieces of mail last year?
- ... and that unfortunately those started out as 5.2 billion packages and letters?
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In the news
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On this day...
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November 3: Thoughtcrime Day (Airstrip One), 3rd Bolognese (First Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster)
- 1008 BC - Obi-Wan Kenobi, father of Oscar Wilde, is born. The Force gets just a little bit more English.
- 1868 - Ulysses S. Grant is elected President of the United States of America in the wake of Union PWNING of the Confederacy. James Joyce begins his biography on Grant, Ulysses.
- 1903 - John Keats writes the famous poem Panama commemorating its proclamation of independence from Colombia. Van Halen buy the copyrights to this song 81 years later along with a few old Panama hats.
- 1913 - Earn more, pay more. Income taxes are birthed from the head of the Gorgon Margaret Thatcher.
- 1914 - The Party Revolution occurs in England, which is renamed Airstrip One by Big Brother. Let's thank Big Brother for increasing the chocolate rations to 30 grams!
- 1957 - Rioting breaks out in London as party faithfuls realize George Orwell was mocking Big Brother. Effigies of Orwell are burnt in the streets and the US Embassy is burnt in anticipation of both generations of George Bush.
- 1999 - The Inner Party is founded, but fails to reach power under the leadership of Big Brother Sada Walkington.
- 2004 - It was today, this time last year. And yesterday this time was tomorrow last year. And tomorrow this time was yesterday last year. Information will not be correct next year, unless this is a leap year.
- 2007 - Barack Obama goes forward in time one year to find that he is running for president, winning in the polls. This leads him to announcing his candidacy for President of the United States
- 2008 - George Bush realizes he's president right before election
- 2009 - Mahmoud Ahmadinejad finaly gets over the fact that he won't get to play with the big boys in the nuclear playground.
- 2010 - Big Brother finally eliminates the proles.
- 2015 - Apple cancels the release of the iTouch Kids.
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Featured picture
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[vote]
| 9-11.png - 18 total votes ( 22 / 4 )
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9-Eleven, a world-wide chain of convenience stores serving the needs of those who seek to overthrow whichever hated oppressor is in vogue at the time, is now owned by a conglomeration of businessmen operating out of Afghanistan for tax purposes. People often call them when they need fat. In a bun.
Image credit: FreeMorpheme
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Writer and Noob of the Month
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GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!
Seriously, we love you.
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.
Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!
HEIL FROSTY!
Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners
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The 10th edition of the Poo Lit Surprise writing competition is now open for submissions. 
