WikiClone

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Our historians think WikiClones were invented approximatly at the same time as Jesus died (approx. 755 B.C.).[w00t] WikiClones used to be clones anyone can edit. This is why Jesus' WikiClone looked more to Michael Jackson than to Jesus himself. As WikiClones are not free ($17.98/month with a basic membership), illegal copies of Britney Spears nude were downloaded by hundreds on illegal P2P programs. Steve Jobs bought 1995 copyrights on WikiClones and made then downloadable on iTunes for $2.99.


This is how our historians think WikiClones might look like. As you can see, only a few details were edited up to date. Please help us to WikiClone this WikiClone by editing this page or by copying it on another article on WikiClones

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Sophie has inspired us to work on -37,345 articles since tomorrow.


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Tomorrow's... Err... Never mind...

Today's featured article – The Witcher

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The Witcher is a short story series/fantasy book saga/role-playing game/Netflix television show. It is set a time period of Medieval knights, monsters, fantastical beings and a lot of magic. If you can imagine a mix of Conan the Barbarian, Game of Thrones and the legends of King Arthur then you will be getting close to what this series is about. Think also of Monty Python and the Holy Grail and a dash of Harry Potter then you would have the formula.

The author of The Witcher is Andrzej Sapkowski (born 1948). He is a Polish-born writer who started his Witcher short stories in the 1980s. This was followed by books in the 1990s, which took almost as long to finish as George R. R. Martin's A Game of Thrones, not ending until 2013. It took even longer for them to be translated into English. Some wish the copyright holders hadn't bothered.

A witcher is essentially a male witch or warlock with the yellow eyes of a cat. He has some magic tricks but normally prefers to express himself with his sword(s). Witchers don't like to talk too much and physically look like Arnold Schwarzenegger's son. Except a witcher is also a 'mutant' and sterile as a jackass. (more...)

Previously featured article – Chess pieces

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Chess is often thought of as a game for pretentious tossers, and for teenage nerds in need of a competitive pastime that doesn’t necessarily end with them being wedgied. But this image is outdated. These days the game is also played by boxers desperate to show that repeated brain trauma has not affected their intelligence. (more...)

You can cry for your dumb articles to be read.

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Selected anniversaries

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July 23: Promptly Shoot Everyone Day

  • 1914: Archduke Franz Ferdinand, his wife, and his moustache are shot and killed while travelling to market in an open buggy, triggering World War I. Authorities agree it was a bad idea to be carrying a Target bag in plain sight.
  • 1942: Promptly Shoot Everyone Day receives a tremendous boost with the opening of the Treblinka Concentration Camp. Up to 6 million take part.
  • 1963: Lee Harvey Oswald (pictured) is assassinated in the Texas Book Depository in Dallas. His alleged assassin is promptly shot, creating a firestorm of controversy and insane conspiracy theories printed on poorly xeroxed fliers.
  • 1965: Malcolm X gives a speech in New York City, decrying the racist motivations behind Promptly Shoot Everyone Day. He is promptly shot and replaced by Malcolm XI.
  • 1973: Bob Marley promptly shoots the sheriff, but he swears he didn't shoot the deputy, or at least he did not shoot the deputy in a prompt and timely manner.
  • 1986: Britain's Prince Andrew marries Sarah Ferguson at Westminster Abbey in London. He then promptly shoots her in the face.
  • 1982: Sasuke Uchiha is born and then is shot... promptly.
  • 2005: Egypt attempts to expand the festival by introducing Promptly Blow Everyone Up Day, leaving 88 dead. It is branded "a wild success" by Libyan President Muammar Gaddafi who offers to provide celebration kits to anyone who asks.
  • 2007: An aspiring pornography actor adopts the moniker "Promptly Shot", but isn't hired for some reason.

Bush

In the news



More Current Events at UnNews News


Did you know that you are viewing a WikiClone of the Uncyclopedia : soon in theatres near you

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Bleed even more

Shit

Writer of the month.png
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


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Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


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It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!


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