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Today's featured article – Chess pieces

Chess is often thought of as a game for pretentious tossers, and for teenage nerds in need of a competitive pastime that doesn’t necessarily end with them being wedgied. But this image is outdated. These days the game is also played by boxers desperate to show that repeated brain trauma has not affected their intelligence.

Though some rules of the game have been adapted slowly over the millennia, the pieces have remained mostly unchanged and continue to move in much the same way as they did for intellectual wannabes in ancient India, friendless geeks in Sassanid Persia, and social inadequates in Moorish Spain.

When a game begins, each side starts with eight pawns (Australian English: Shrimps) - twelve short of a barbie. As the least valuable and most expendable member of your army, your pawns should be assigned a place in the front rank of the infantry. Do not waste body-armour or weapons on these grunts. Advanced players use terror and centuries of oppression to compel their pawns to advance unarmed and unarmoured across the open battlefield, even in the face of airborne attack from the Rooks. (more...)

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Previously featured article – John Mahama

John Dramani Mahama (born 29 November 1958) is the 12th and 14th President of Ghana, his current term having begun on 7 January 2025. Ghanaian voters were inspired by Donald Trump being both the 45th and 47th U.S. President and anxious to prove that Ghana could do it too. They were also ready for another go, having had four years to recover from Mahama's first Presidency. (more...)

Did you know ...

... that alligators sing to communicate over long distances with other alligators? (pictured)
... that virtual reality will soon allow you to read this in 3D?
... brevity is?
... that you can't wear my sweatshirt? It's mine!
... that a 40 foot tall pine tree is almost always taller than a 30 foot tall one?
... that the A Train is "a" train?
... that if we lose cabin pressure, masks will drop from just above your head?
- ... and darn it, I always get the Richard Nixon mask!

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On this day

June 28: Adamand Eve (Kenya, Iceland), Obliviousness Awareness Day (Chad, China)

1493 - Unimpressed by Columbus' attempt to reach the Far East by sailing west, navigator Ernesto de Borgnine attempts to reach the Americas by sailing East. His ship crashes into the Cadiz docks thirty seconds into his journey.
1572 - The day the music died.
1573 - The day the music was resurrected as a zombie.
1619 - Nostradamus predicts that everyone will die someday, including the music.
1745 - Sharon Stone begins her first retirement at the age of 57.
1851 - Franco-Pakistani War ends in a draw after a sudden death match.
1865 - The Army of the Potomac is disbanded but will re-emerge as the KISS Army many years later.
1914 - A driver takes a wrong turn in Sarajevo and runs over Franz Ferdinand in the process. World War One finds an excuse to start.
1922 - The bloody war between Chile and France ends abruptly when both countries realize that they don't have common borders to fight over.
1947 - Obliviousness Awareness Day declared in Chad. Chadians celebrate by starving as usual.
1950 - Seoul is captured by North Korean forces; James Brown is not amused.
1973 - Scholars discover the first gay couple, Adam and Steve, in Israel. In other news, it's the goddamn doodly best day ever because Maddox visits Chicago.
1980 - An earthquake destroys the Chinese city of Bu-Chu-Fu; millions die. When rescue crews complain about poor building construction, the Chinese government declares it to be Obliviousness Awareness Day.
2009 - One of our greatest, Billy Mays, passes on to infomercial heaven. You can get Billy Mays and for a limited time only, his charisma for not one or two but three eternities!

Today's featured picture

"Hey, guys! Where ya goin'? I'm all packed and... aaaww, shit, there goes the bus."

Image credit: Some user

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