Babel:Spb

Welcome to Uncyclopedia, Superb Owl Sunday edition!, the future Hall-of-Famer that Peyton Manning still can't edit. Jerome Bettis has inspired us to work on 37,392 articles since opening in January 2005. Mike Holmgren has posted his XL Superb Owl gameplan for both teams to read before the game. Before editing, please read the Beginner's Guide and browse the Big Five. Sports | Games | Madden | Players | Owls | Commercials History | playbook | other gay American sports

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Today's featured article Today's featured article – Switzerland Switzerland is a mountainous region created in the early 13th century in order to contain gold and produce chocolate bars. From this point on, the insatiable Swiss desire for idyll building (idyllification) led to the creation of a nation remarkable for its efficient transport networks, orderly villages and synchronised repetitive yodelling. At the beginning of time, Switzerland was a small moon orbiting the Earth, populated entirely by cows, sheep, and shepherd dogs; it is now thought to be where those creatures came from in the first place and it was known as tobleronistan. Location of Switzerland, according to CNN. Due to continental drift, the country now lies south of Germany. After being sent down to Earth, having fallen behind on sky-high rent, Switzerland came to be located south of Germany, bordering France, Italy, Australia and Liechtenstein. Switzerland annexed Czechia in 1990 because the country got too cramped and stuff is cheaper in eastern Europe, although today most Swiss are known to have trillions of dollars in the bank. (more...) Recently featured: St. Pierre and Miquelon Minotaur The Witcher Archive Vote for featured articles Previously featured article – St. Pierre and Miquelon St. Pierre and Michelob (technically, the Territorial Collectivity of Saint Pierre et Michelob; French: Collectivité territoriale de Saint-Pierre-et-Michelob), is an archipelago of small islands off the coast of eastern Canada, the main islands being St. Pierre and Michelob, south of the Canadian province of Newfoundland and Labatt. The islands come within 10 km of Newfoundland. (more...) You can vote for your favorite articles to be featured. More of the best of Uncyclopedia Download article feed plugin for Google Desktop edit Selected anniversaries David Beckham in traditional pose. January 18: Wenns Day (aka Humping Day) 853 - General Ackbar ruins his voice by yelling, 'It's a trap!!' too many times during the Dark Ages. 1321 - Every chicken in the world mysteriously circumnavigates the globe in the middle of the night, returning to the same spot where they were the previous evening. 1466 - An unknown musician perishes when his steam-powered accordion explodes while he plays Lady of Spain. The venue burns to the ground causing many casualties, This then is the first example but not the last of the accordion being a weapon of mass destruction. 1610 - God divinely inspires Sidney Trammell; Trammell doesn't notice for another two years. 1778 - James Cook is the first known European to discover the Sandwich Islands, which are later renamed the 'Tunny Fish Sandwich Islands', then 'Tuna Sandwich with Chips Islands', 'Tuna Sandwich with Chips and a Drink (no ice) Islands', and 'Japan's Target Islands' before eventually becoming the 'Hawaiian Islands'. James Cook would go on to become a menu item himself. 1952 - The first issue of Mad Magazine is thrown in the garbage by your mom. 1987 - The inventor of the frozen TV dinner dies and is cryogenically frozen. It is unknown what side dishes are included as nobody has seen the box. 1990 - The Humpty Dance is the #1 song in America. Depressing, eh? 1996 - The Spice Girls declare their hatred for the West. Angry Wurzels fans retaliate. 2000 - David Beckham is transformed from human being into a brand. 2002 - Filmmakers are forced to change the title of their footie movie Bent Like Beckham. 2008 - Cloverfield hits theaters across America. Unfortunately for New York, the movie is based on a true story. Archived Anniversaries	suggest Word of the day procrastination Try to use it in conversation. Knowledge is power. edit In the news Trump breaks the Mustache Mafia (pictured) Hegseth orders drone attack on Santa Claus Trump renames Christmas Uncyclopedia implements funny ban Miley Cyrus lends her wrecking ball to Donald Trump Prince Andrew to go into permanent exile John Bolton is indicted Florida to use Cracker Barrels as immigration checkpoints Flying Dildos dominate the WNBA Epstein list emerges Miss England to Miss World: I'm out Qatar gifts Trump an airplane Popeye deported for gang-related tattoos DOGE calls on Uncyclopedia Weezer gets weird at Trump's inauguration More Current Events at UnNews News edit Did you know... ... that Bill Cowher isn't actually that fireman that saved you, ma'am? ... taht wrods and snetnces are raedalbe eevn wehn tehy are toatlly fckued up? Do you care... ... that Peyton Manning knows Terrell Owens is the REAL reason he's not playing Today? ... the film Casablanca takes 102 minutes to tell the story of a guy who gets his ex and her husband to the airport? Read More
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Quarterback of the Month and Waterboy of the Month David Gerard. What needs to be said about this extraordinary person? He lived life to the fullest. He scaled Everest and swam the Marianas. He piloted a kayak through the rivers of the Yukon with naught but a broken compass to guide him. Now he sits in a nursing home: Alzheimer's has rotted his brain to such an extent that he no longer recognizes himself as the WotM-winning author of Voice Chat, Fountainhead Earth and X Window System. If a picture is worth a thousand words, those on Noob of the Month MoneySign's image gallery are good for an average of at least 940 words apiece (he loses points because his Taste picture offends the Greeks). Classic Money highlights include Hazard Dogs and the tuberiffic logo for UnNews, which MS constructed entirely out of string, spittle and beer can tabs. Congratulations to Rcmurphy, this year's Most Valuable Player! Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Past Winners: 2005/2006

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