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As it happens, a Main Page is a page of primarity, popularity and urination-arity Today's featured paragraph Recently featured: Woolly mammoth Archive – Vote for featured articles You know you're WTF when... Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 377,186 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 377,186 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 377,186 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 377,186 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 377,186 total flamewars purged. Advertising Did you know... *... that every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings? ... and that's why you have to wait so long to get your takeout order? ... a stoat bloated with oats in the moat floats all boats? ... that every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings? ... and that's why you have to wait so long to get your takeout order? ... a stoat bloated with oats in the moat floats all boats? ... that every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings? ... and that's why you have to wait so long to get your takeout order? ... a stoat bloated with oats in the moat floats all boats? ... that every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings? ... and that's why you have to wait so long to get your takeout order?	In the news I'm a doctor — You're peeing all wrong US polls are broken ( listen) DNA evidence shows how Christ would vote (pictured) Lebanon upgrades comms gear Ohio city goes to the dogs NE Patriots go "Judon-frei" Biden drops out, Harris goes large‎‎ Starmer wins British general election Assassin shoots Uncyclopedia in ear Pope Francis revealed to be chat-bot‎ Sunak soaked for General Election announcement Ferrell sues owner of look-alike dog Alfa Romeos to get even uglier Ukraine minister charged with corruption French guard Buckingham Palace On this day... November 21: International Couch Potato Day 1783 - Oprah and Shoobily Boobily ze French Guy had the first untethered hot balls flight. 1847 - The Great Irish Potato Famine reduces the number of couch potatoes in Scotland and Ireland by 25%. Tragically, this results in a global Deep-fried Mars Bar recession. 1877 - Thomas Edison announced his invention of the pornograph. 1963 - Lee Harvey Oswald gets laid for the last time. 1969 - The first AARPNET link was established. 1987 - Morrissey becomes the first person ever to be eaten by a grue and live. Annoyed, the grue eats him again. 1996 - Couch Potato Day is established to encourage nations to collectively sit on their asses watching pointless programs at the same time. Scheduled Programs for this day included 100 Ways to Watch Paint Dry, and 20 Things You Didn't Know About Carpet. 2002 - NATO invites Bulimia, A Stoner, Laffy Taffy, Lithium-Ion, Ramen-Mania, Slavekia and Slavekneea to become members. 2003 - Megatron destroys the Earth, only for it to be remade by Ultra Jesus. 2004 - I Can't Believe It's Not Jesus distributes Nintendo DS systems to cheering (m)asses in Nude York Shitty. 3503 - God purchases for Earth the expansion pack, Earth, 21st Century Terror. We all love him for that, don't we?
Featured picture [vote] Drunkos.jpg Drunkos.jpg - 10 cups stacked ( 13 / 3 ) The Drunk Olympics is an athletic competition in which all participating athletes compete in several sporting events while intoxicated far beyond the typical human breaking point. It has spawned the creation of several organized competitions, including Thunderdome and Cup Stacking. Image credit: The Thinker
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Writer and Noob of the Month GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia! Seriously, we love you. Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor. Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come! It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon! HEIL FROSTY! Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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