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“I've never seen such urination-arity!”
~ Oscar Wilde on this page
“This is the Main Page”
~ Captain Obvious on this page
As it happens, a Main Page is a page of primarity, popularity and urination-arity
Today's featured paragraph
Recently featured:
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Did you know...
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*... that Alaska is a mooseocracy, in which citizens select a moose to lead them?
- ... that bears have been known to challenge for the role of Alaska's leader?
- ... if the entire human race linked arms around the Earth, most of the population would drown?
- ... that Alaska is a mooseocracy, in which citizens select a moose to lead them?
- ... that bears have been known to challenge for the role of Alaska's leader?
- ... if the entire human race linked arms around the Earth, most of the population would drown?
- ... that Alaska is a mooseocracy, in which citizens select a moose to lead them?
- ... that bears have been known to challenge for the role of Alaska's leader?
- ... if the entire human race linked arms around the Earth, most of the population would drown?
- ... that Alaska is a mooseocracy, in which citizens select a moose to lead them?
- ... that bears have been known to challenge for the role of Alaska's leader?
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In the news
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On this day...
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June 20: "Have A Nice Day" Day, Nice Day Appreciation Day (New Zealand), Just Another Day (Earth)
- A Long Time Ago in a Galaxy Far, Far Away: Darth Vader, The Emperor, Yoda and Luke Skywalker are ordered by the Imperial Senate to take acting lessons.
- 1782 - The U.S. Congress establishes the Great Seal of the United States. It is a California seal named Buster.
- 1801 - Buster is killed in a British terrorist attack on Brooklyn Zoo. Buster's daughter Bibi is named National Seal. Salmon stage protests in major cities.
- 1877 - Alexander Graham Bell installs the world's first telephone service so that he can build his phone sex empire – it would become very successful.
- 1883 - Oscar Wilde completes his play The Duchess of Paduan, which would later be converted into the Star Wars septology.
- 1893 - Lizzie Borden is acquitted for the murders of her father and stepmother, mostly due to the court allowing Borden to brandish an axe at the prosecution, judge, jurors, and small children in the audience.
- 1923 - The United States government interrupts 30 years of nothing happening on June 20 to wish everyone "a nice day."
- 1925 - The "Have A Nice Day" riots finally subside.
- 1926 - Indictments for "Have A Nice Day" riots quashed. Judge says "have a nice day". Riots resume, ending after martial law declared.
- 1927 - Everyone finally has a nice day on Have A Nice Day Riots Day Day. Only minor rioting happens, as people too confused by its name.
- 1959 - A rare hurricane strikes Canada's Gulf of St. Lawrence, destroying vast sasquatch habitat and postponing the National Curling Championships.
- 1963 - The United States and the Soviet Union establish the "red telephone" line so that the leaders of both nations can ask how each others' day was and generally make small talk, replacing the old method of communication between the two, threatening each other with nuclear war.
- 2289 - The British finally land on the moon. They discover that tea cannot be taken in 1/8 gravity, cancelling the mission amid a not so nice day.
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Featured picture
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[vote]
| MonoLisa.jpg - 19.5 total votes ( 32.5 / 13 )
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DaVinci's Hewlett-Packard printer was to be the undoing of his most famous work, resulting in what art scholars have termed the "Mono Lisa."
Hewlett Packard were unavailable for comment as the CEO was busy discussing a merger with Ferrari to create the world's first petrol powered printer.
DaVinci is said to be in a closed door meeting with Dan Brown to discuss the implications of this event.
Image credit: Nonymous
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Writer and Noob of the Month
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GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!
Seriously, we love you.
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.
Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!
HEIL FROSTY!
Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners
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