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Today's Free Sample! Today's featured article – St. Pierre and Miquelon St. Pierre and Michelob (technically, the Territorial Collectivity of Saint Pierre et Michelob; French: Collectivité territoriale de Saint-Pierre-et-Michelob), is an archipelago of small islands off the coast of eastern Canada, the main islands being St. Pierre and Michelob, south of the Canadian province of Newfoundland and Labatt. The islands come within 10 km of Newfoundland. Within France, the archipelago has the status of "territorial collectivity" because it sounds more dignified than "neglected islands". Its residents are French citizens; they elect one Deputy to the National Assembly — though, in view of the territory's population (6,008 as of the 2016 census, which was thereafter disbanded), he is only allowed to vote on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. They are also allowed to hold opinions on Senator and President. St. Pierre and Michelob is all that is left of the once-sprawling North American empire of "New France". (Quebec aspires to the same status, but every time Parisians hear that accent, they are glad they cut them loose.) Acadia broke ties with the territory when it became evident that the islanders were even lazier and more cowardly than the Acadians. It is notable for being France's only remaining possession in North America, and if France washes its hands too, it will not have any notability. (more...) Recently featured: Minotaur The Witcher Chess pieces Archive Vote for featured articles Previously featured article – Minotaur The Minotaur was a half-human, half-bull creature in Greek mythology. Rather than a domestic cow, the bovine parent was an auroch, now extinct, as opposed to an auror, which is hoped to be extinct. The tale is probably a manifestation of man’s historic fascination with cow sex. The odd combination of species stands as proof of Creationism, though not by the usual expected deity. (more...) You can vote for your favorite articles to be featured when you become an EXCLUSIVE MEMBER. More of the best of Uncyclopedia edit More can be yours! Join today! October 29: National Ignorance Awareness Day, International Rescue Day (Thunderbirds Are Go!) 922 - Peasants throughout Europe suddenly realize they are quite ignorant. Then, as one, they return to working in the fields, figuring they are too stupid to do anything else. 1576 - Rolf Harris invents the wobble board and didgeridoo. He is able to play both at the same time while groping girls. 1675 - Leibniz makes the first use of the long s, ∫, for integral. 315 years later I have to take calculus. Thanks, man. Thanks a fucking lot. 1782 - God gets up, has a slice of toast, then decides it's all too much bother and goes to bed again for 500 years. 1895 - International Rescue is established, with 2 horses, a penny-farthing bike, a rowboat and a good shovel. 1929 - The New York Stock Exchange crashes in what will be called the Crash of '29 or Black Tuesday, beginning the Great Depression. I think that was like, when, everyone got really unhappy for a long time. 1955 - Mother Brown gets me Dog And Bone. 1966 - For meritorious service, the Thunderbirds are knighted by the Queen. During the ceremony, she accidentally cuts their strings with her sword, causing embarrassment for all. 1969 - The first-ever computer-to-computer link is established on ARPANET, the precursor to the Internet. It is used to send porn. 1972 - President Richard Nixon declares that he is addicted to the word "declares". 1985 - Howard the Duck, dude. Howard the Duck. 1990 - Rolf Harris horrifies an audience in Melbourne with filthy basslines on his didgeridoo in an attempt to attract underage girls, while wearing only his CBE medal. 1998 - Space shuttle Discovery blasts off with 77-year-old John Glenn on board, making him the oldest person to go into space. He bores astronauts by telling them about how in his day, they didn't have astronaut ice cream, and that there were no zero-G toilets, they just had to hold it in the entire mission. 2002 - Ozone is linked to Al-Qaida, President Bush vows to increase carbon dioxide outputs as USA leads the way in the War on Terra. 2009 - Pam Anderson's breasts become self aware. Archived Anniversaries	edit For exclusive news coverage, get UnNews PLUS! Miley Cyrus lends her wrecking ball to Donald Trump Prince Andrew to go into permanent exile (pictured) John Bolton is indicted Florida to use Cracker Barrels as immigration checkpoints Flying Dildos dominate the WNBA Epstein list emerges Miss England to Miss World: I'm out Qatar gifts Trump an airplane Popeye deported for gang-related tattoos DOGE calls on Uncyclopedia Weezer gets weird at Trump's inauguration Trump tees up new American empire Elon Musk prepares for world government I'm a doctor — You're peeing all wrong US polls are broken ( listen) More Current Events at UnNews News edit Did you know... That you can get Did You Know in your email if you SUBSCRIBE TODAY! ... that a live action version of Steamboat Willie is set for release next summer? Read More
edit Recent articles! Exclusive access for PLUS members ONLY! Alexander the Not So Great | Dubnium (pictured) | Hebe | Carbon tetrachloride | Tetrachloroethylene | Northrop B-2 Spirit | Blue Fairies | People's Action Party (Singapore) | Woof | John Mahama | Vivek Ramaswamy | Norse Korea | Michael VI | Factorial | Bunsen burner | Queue | Odysseus | Mutually exclusive events‎ | Calcium | Kristi Noem | Anti-Zionism | Kevin McCarthy | Mike Johnson | House of Bourbon | Akaa, Finland | Nikki Haley | Menelaus | Ajax | Air Canada | Agamemnon | Great Schism More recent articles
Exclusive PLUS member of the Month!!! GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia! Seriously, we love you. Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor. Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come! It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon! HEIL FROSTY! Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 37,356 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:

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Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on May 2, 2019. We know you're doing much better now; we simply can't be bothered.

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​	Ebatsüklopeedia Eesti Estonia 96	Neciklopēdija Latviešu Latvia 158	Juokopedija Lietuvių Lithuania 276	Neciklopedio Esperanto Esperanto 4720	Unsaiklopedia 𐌲𐌿𐍄𐌹𐍃𐌺‬ Goths 12
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on May 2, 2019. We know you're simply bustling these days, but we simply can't be bothered.

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