From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation
Jump to search
left
St. Pierre and Michelob (technically, the Territorial Collectivity of Saint Pierre et Michelob; French: Collectivité territoriale de Saint-Pierre-et-Michelob), is an archipelago of small islands off the coast of eastern Canada, the main islands being St. Pierre and Michelob, south of the Canadian province of Newfoundland and Labatt. The islands come within 10 km of Newfoundland.
Within France, the archipelago has the status of "territorial collectivity" because it sounds more dignified than "neglected islands". Its residents are French citizens; they elect one Deputy to the National Assembly — though, in view of the territory's population (6,008 as of the 2016 census, which was thereafter disbanded), he is only allowed to vote on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. They are also allowed to hold opinions on Senator and President.
St. Pierre and Michelob is all that is left of the once-sprawling North American empire of "New France". (Quebec aspires to the same status, but every time Parisians hear that accent, they are glad they cut them loose.) Acadia broke ties with the territory when it became evident that the islanders were even lazier and more cowardly than the Acadians. It is notable for being France's only remaining possession in North America, and if France washes its hands too, it will not have any notability. (more...)
Previously featured article – Minotaur
The Minotaur was a half-human, half-bull creature in Greek mythology. Rather than a domestic cow, the bovine parent was an auroch, now extinct, as opposed to an auror, which is hoped to be extinct. The tale is probably a manifestation of man’s historic fascination with cow sex. The odd combination of species stands as proof of Creationism, though not by the usual expected deity. (more...)
|
Did you know...
|
*... people suffering from writer's block are usually very... something?
- ... that walking in the air will not make you fly in the moonlit sky?
- ... because of Anonymous' credibility, he has become a frequent source of information for news articles?
- ... that Richard the Lionheart of England had a "Richard the Lionheart" of his own?
- ... that I am a schizophrenic?
- ... and so am I?
- ... me too?
- ... shut up, Frank, you're not even supposed to be here today.
- ... the US Postal Service delivered over 7.7 billion pieces of mail last year?
- ... and that unfortunately those started out as 5.2 billion packages and letters?
|
|
In the news
|
|
|
On this day...
|
December 8: Llamas Against China Day, The Death of Metal
- 1000 BCE - A little Chinese prince is holidaying in Tibet. Whilst he was innocently trying to feed a local llama some grain, it viciously bites him. And so begins countless millennia of conflict.
- 684 - Tibetan llamas eat all the grass so that when the Mongolians try to invade there is nothing for their horses to eat. This is the first example of scorched earth tactics.
- 751 - Chinese invade Tibet again. The Chinese strike a deal with the llamas – they will have a singing competition and whoever wins gets sovereignty over Tibet. This is the first instance of the Llama Song. Thousands of Chinese soldiers get nasty nips from vicious llamas in the victory celebrations.
- 1231 - The Dalai Llama seduces the Chinese king, but after they'd been going steady for a couple of months the Llama cheats on him with Kublai Khan. The Chinese king calls the llama a slut and finds a less attractive rebound girlfriend and cries himself to sleep for a month.
- 1567 - The Dalai Llama tells all the other Central Asian leaders that the Chinese king is gay. This does not have the negative connotations that it does in the West so the Dalai Llama also said the king had sex with young boys.
- 1789 - Llama blah blah blah Tibet blah China. Blah blah blah China blah llama. Llama breaks China's grandmother's hip and takes the last bit of cheesecake.
- 1931 - Llama mentions to Emperor Hirohito that China is pretty shit and that he might as well go in and take over. Then he whispered quietly in the Emperor's ear that if any Japanese are looking for easy women, Nanking is the place.
- 1950 - The PRC takes over Tibet, suffering many painful llama bites.
- 1980 - Mark David Chapman, aided by a llama, kills John Lennon.
- 2001 - In a secret coup d'etat the llamas topple the Illuminati, the Skull and Bones Club and the Jews and assume de facto secret leadership of the world. And when China least expects it... POW!!! Right in the kisser with a big llama bite.
- 2003- Llamas take over Wikipedia and use it to take over the world.
- 2005- Jeff from accounting nails your wife in the parking lot at the company Christmas party. A llama gets sloppy seconds.
|
| Colonization of the Week
|
For the glory of her majesty
Help us clear the ivy of crap,
and plant the seeds of humour.
|
|
Today's featured picture
|
[vote]
| GalleryofWTF.png - 5 quid for entrance ( 5 / 0 )
|
|
The 21st century realist art left many masterpieces. The Gallery of World's Tableaux of Fame hosts many artworks from different parts of the world.
Image credit: 90s Kid21
|
|
Writer and Noob of the Month
|
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!
Seriously, we love you.
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.
Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!
HEIL FROSTY!
Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners
|
Uncyclopedia's sista projects
Uncyclopedia is an independent humor writing project, a non-profitable cabal that also hosts a range of other projects.
Uncyclopedia languages
This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains
37,364 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many
languages:
Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and an elite clan of Clinjas.
