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37,398 governments to overthrow
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Today's featured propaganda
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Today's featured article – Windows XP
Windows XP, aka NT 5.1.2600, Windows XD or Windows :P is a detestable operating system. It remains Microsoft's "best" system to date, being far superior to subsequent products according to most late adopters.[1] It had an innovative graphical user interface compared to the bloatware known as MS-DOS, while taking up only 40 gigs of disk space. Its file system interacted fully with more dominant operating systems such as OS/2 Warp and Linux, and it featured enhanced mouse support, although still lacking rat support.
 If you caught a BSOD, you need to insert a quarter to continue. (In Britain, a pound coin will work, if you push hard.) Production of XP began in 1998 and was completed in 2000. However, Microsoft realized it did not crash enough, so they worked on making it vulnerable, bug-filled, and overall, an unmitigated pile of blue (or green) screens of death. (more...)
Previously featured article – Switzerland
Switzerland is a mountainous region created in the early 13th century in order to contain gold and produce chocolate bars. From this point on, the insatiable Swiss desire for idyll building (idyllification) led to the creation of a nation remarkable for its efficient transport networks, orderly villages and synchronised repetitive yodelling. (more...)
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Did you know...
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- ... that there are at least three other businesses like show business?
- ... that resistance is futile, so you should calculate using impedance instead?
- ... that 9/11 might not have ever happened if dates had not been invented?
- ... that Wright-Patterson Air Force Base is home to a heavily guarded repository of bad puns?
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In the news
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On this day...
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 [Insert double entendre here] February 1: International [Insert Holiday Here] Day, Old Meme Flogging Day
- 24398 BCE - First fat kid falls down the first flight of stairs.</nowiki>
- 13455 BCE - Mammoth shaming works all too well, driving them to extinction. Nice going.
- c.2000 BCE - Moses brings the Ten Commandments to his people, but forgets to go back for the tablet that contains Rule 34.
- [Insert a year from 0-43 AD here] - [Insert overdone Jesus joke here]
- [Insert 1337 here] - [Insert tired, pointless noob joke here]
- [Insert date that doesn't follow the given order at all] - [Insert sexual innuendo with [insert name here] and [insert name here] along with an event that defies logic]
- [Insert year here] - [Insert event that takes place in Paris here] - [Insert sentence containing 'Rioting' here]
- 1989 - Cats conspire to take over the internet but are foiled by humanity's deep love of Pr0n.
- 1991 - Richard Simmons overdoes exercise and is mistaken for what would later be known as Slenderman.
- 2006 - James Blunt admits he was fed helium as a child and recommends it to the youth of today
- 20X6 - Correct me if I'm wrong but are you asking me for a challenge?!?!
- [Insert 2101 AD here] - [Insert tired, pointless All Your Base reference here]
- <nowiki>[Insert (absurdly large number times two absurdly large numbers) AD here] - [Insert worn out and over used joke about a clone of your mother and me here].
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To whom it may concern: I am writing to you today regarding Mr. Nydas, who I understand is applying for a position at your institution. Mr. Nydas is one of the most inspiring students I have ever had the p LOLOLOLOL PENNIS THE MENACE IS MY FAVORITE ACTION FIGURE SHITTY SHITTY BANG BANG LOL LOL WHOAAAAA THEEEEESE IZ KOOL, Y'ALLS leasure to instruct; though deaf, blind, mute and crippled from birth, he has managed to overcome his circumstances and express himself eloquently through his writing. His essays and stories are for him an adventure, an escape from the terribly unfortunate and hopeless reality of his life. Though he knows he is unlikely to survive the next four years, he remains irrepressibly cheerful and determined to become a famous author of children's books. You and I know this will never happen, but when he turns to you with his empty eyes, his face tragically wasted by leprosy, one cannot but root for him in his battle with the cruel, cruel world.
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This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 37,398 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
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- ↑ Windows XP remains the overwhelming favorite of late adopters so hidebound as to also refuse to adopt the term "African American," though it seems we're onto something else now.
