Main Page (editable)

Welcome to Uncyclopedia, the content-free piece of false stupid junk that anyone can edit. 37,394 articles in English

Politics Games Computers

People Quaint Coherent

Science History All

Today's featured article List of abbreviations: N This edit created a new page (also see list of new pages) m This is a minor edit b This edit was performed by a bot (±123) The page size changed by this number of bytes 25 January 2026      16:00  (Huff log)‎ [Spike‎ (18×)]       16:00 Spike talk contribs deleted page John Harvey Fucking Kellogg the Motherfuckin Nonce ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       16:00 Spike talk contribs deleted page Lincoln Loud Gets His Period ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       16:00 Spike talk contribs deleted page Penis butter ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       16:00 Spike talk contribs deleted page Timmy Turner’s Ego Collapse ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       16:00 Spike talk contribs deleted page Svex the Shit Stain ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       16:00 Spike talk contribs deleted page Ronnie Anne Santiago Beaten in Prison ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       16:00 Spike talk contribs deleted page Moobs.edu ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       16:00 Spike talk contribs deleted page Return of the Crocotta ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       15:05 Spike talk contribs deleted page File:EthanPannies.png ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       15:05 Spike talk contribs deleted page File:EthanMaid.png ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       15:05 Spike talk contribs deleted page File:Prosciutto bagel on a Hanukkah plate.jpeg ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       15:05 Spike talk contribs deleted page File:Timmy Turner’s Ego Collapse.jpeg ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       15:05 Spike talk contribs deleted page File:Ethan’s Rage Candy Bar Diet.png ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       15:05 Spike talk contribs deleted page File:Boxentriq-morse-code-1769338795098.wav ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       15:05 Spike talk contribs deleted page File:Your mum.jpeg ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       15:05 Spike talk contribs deleted page File:SPIKE when he wakes up and sees the vandalism.gif ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       15:05 Spike talk contribs deleted page File:Lincoln Loud Sexy in Underwear and Shirtless.gif ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword)       15:05 Spike talk contribs deleted page File:Pull Back, Look For Cheese, Find a Pussy.png ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword) N    15:42  Forum:9‎ diffhist +110‎ 65.130.170.89 talk AGP N    15:42  Forum:12‎ diffhist +110‎ 72.195.188.46 talk Malaysian Ringgit      15:21  (User creation log)‎ [VIUKatharina‎; SKZRosemary‎; PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword‎; PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJar‎; PaulaBooker9‎; Mireya57P8679‎; MaurineHuynh2‎; MattieStelzer82‎; MalloryFuerst29‎; KraigT558081‎; KeeshaOFarrell1‎; ArielleSpears17‎; AlfredQuilty371‎; AlbertaLain76‎; AaronFerrier402‎]       15:21 User account AaronFerrier402 talk contribs was created ‎       15:10 User account MalloryFuerst29 talk contribs was created ‎       12:58 User account VIUKatharina talk contribs was created ‎       12:37 User account KraigT558081 talk contribs was created ‎       12:33 User account MaurineHuynh2 talk contribs was created ‎       12:24 User account AlbertaLain76 talk contribs was created ‎       12:15 User account PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword talk contribs was created ‎       11:35 User account SKZRosemary talk contribs was created ‎       11:22 User account MattieStelzer82 talk contribs was created ‎       10:57 User account PaulaBooker9 talk contribs was created ‎       10:26 User account AlfredQuilty371 talk contribs was created ‎       10:25 User account KeeshaOFarrell1 talk contribs was created ‎       08:07 User account PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJar talk contribs was created ‎       08:04 User account ArielleSpears17 talk contribs was created ‎       07:52 User account Mireya57P8679 talk contribs was created ‎      15:10  (Block log)‎ [Spike‎; Abuse filter‎ (4×)]       15:10 Abuse filter talk contribs blocked MalloryFuerst29 talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) ‎(Automatically blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Apparent spambot)       15:05 Spike talk contribs blocked PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled, email disabled, cannot edit own talk page) ‎(Vandal)       13:52 Abuse filter talk contribs blocked Mireya57P8679 talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) ‎(Automatically blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Apparent spambot)       11:18 Abuse filter talk contribs blocked KeeshaBuckmaster talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) ‎(Automatically blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Apparent spambot)       10:27 Abuse filter talk contribs blocked AlfredQuilty371 talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) ‎(Automatically blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Apparent spambot)      14:32  (Upload log)‎ [PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword‎ (10×)]       14:32 PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword talk contribs uploaded File:Pull Back, Look For Cheese, Find a Pussy.png ‎       14:31 PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword talk contribs uploaded File:Lincoln Loud Sexy in Underwear and Shirtless.gif ‎       14:29 PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword talk contribs uploaded File:SPIKE when he wakes up and sees the vandalism.gif ‎       14:28 PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword talk contribs uploaded File:Your mum.jpeg ‎       14:26 PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword talk contribs uploaded File:Boxentriq-morse-code-1769338795098.wav ‎       12:36 PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword talk contribs uploaded File:Ethan’s Rage Candy Bar Diet.png ‎       12:34 PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword talk contribs uploaded File:Timmy Turner’s Ego Collapse.jpeg ‎       12:29 PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword talk contribs uploaded File:Prosciutto bagel on a Hanukkah plate.jpeg ‎       12:18 PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword talk contribs uploaded File:EthanMaid.png ‎(Wet dreams on my period)       12:16 PokemonEthanFigureInTheTamponJarIForgotMyPassword talk contribs uploaded File:EthanPannies.png ‎ (continued...) Recently featured: Gay Pride - Super Smash Bros: Xtreme Beach Volleyball - Ernest Hemingway's Cookery Corner - See Dick - Neolithic Age Did you know... *... the reason for 50% of modern marriages ending in divorce is because those people try to go to IKEA together for a relaxing afternoon? ... that The Manchurian Candidate is about a blustering hotelier that is brainwashed by a foreign government to do its bidding when he becomes president? Oh, wait... ... the reason for 50% of modern marriages ending in divorce is because those people try to go to IKEA together for a relaxing afternoon? ... that The Manchurian Candidate is about a blustering hotelier that is brainwashed by a foreign government to do its bidding when he becomes president? Oh, wait... ... the reason for 50% of modern marriages ending in divorce is because those people try to go to IKEA together for a relaxing afternoon?	In the news Trump breaks the Mustache Mafia (pictured) Hegseth orders drone attack on Santa Claus Trump renames Christmas Uncyclopedia implements funny ban Miley Cyrus lends her wrecking ball to Donald Trump Prince Andrew to go into permanent exile John Bolton is indicted Florida to use Cracker Barrels as immigration checkpoints Flying Dildos dominate the WNBA Epstein list emerges Miss England to Miss World: I'm out Qatar gifts Trump an airplane Popeye deported for gang-related tattoos DOGE calls on Uncyclopedia Weezer gets weird at Trump's inauguration On this day... BOI-OI-OIIIING!!! January 25: Januarymas - Happy Januarymas everyone!, Winter-een-mas begins 722 BC - The Roman goddess Juno takes the month of January away from the godlet Janus for being two-faced. 50 BCE - Nero plays the violin while Rome burns. Orange Blossom Special is a popular request. 959 - Due to constant raids by Vikings, scribes don't get a chance to start creating illuminated Christmas cards until August, so none are available to send until after Christmas. A further delay is caused by Royal Mail workers going on strike until late January, leading to the sarcastic 'Happy Januarymas' greeting by noblemen receiving delayed mail, followed by a volley of arrows. 1572 - The longest icicle ever recorded in history is found hanging from Tsar Ivan the Terrible's nose. Nobody feels tsary about it. 1759 - Robert Burns decides to celebrate Januarymas. Thousands of Scotch get drunk off product of same name. 1810 - Groundhogs begin winding up their careful calculations for next month's weather predictions. After 1927, they would just wing it. 1990 - A magic leprechaun starts accumulating knowledge. 1992 - Steve Ballmer begins his wrath upon all. 2005 - Carson Daly beats the crap out of Dick Clark in the middle of Times Square. ABC, frantic, quickly replaces Clark with noted gaydar Ryan Seacrest (pictured), and Ryan Seacrest Presents Dick Clark's January's Rockin' Mas is a modest hit with target audiences. No word on Brian Dunkleman, though. 2008 - Ryan Seacrest finally comes out of his closet after 2 years of looking for that stylish Versace waistcoat. 2101 - "For græt justice!" becomes a catch phrase. 2103 - It is discovered that Heath Ledger faked his death and went to live with Elvis Presley; he dies for real today, or so it is hoped.
Today's featured picture [vote] UKLanding01.jpg UKLanding01.jpg - 15 British Moon Landings ( 21 / 6 ) This is one small step for a gentleman, rather too much for working class types, I fear. Image credit: Mhaille
edit Recent Articles Alexander the Not So Great (pictured) | Dubnium | Hebe | Carbon tetrachloride | Tetrachloroethylene | Northrop B-2 Spirit | Blue Fairies | People's Action Party (Singapore) | Woof | John Mahama | Vivek Ramaswamy | Norse Korea | Michael VI | Factorial | Bunsen burner | Queue | Odysseus | Mutually exclusive events‎ | Calcium | Kristi Noem | Anti-Zionism | Kevin McCarthy | Mike Johnson | House of Bourbon | Akaa, Finland | Nikki Haley | Menelaus | Ajax | Air Canada | Agamemnon | Great Schism More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about...
Writer and Noob of the Month me GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia! Seriously, we love you. Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor. Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come! It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon! HEIL FROSTY! Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners You have less than a week, just 6 days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month, GET VOTING!!

Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is an independent humor writing project, a non-profitable cabal that also hosts a range of other projects.

	UnNews The news source on crack		Uncyclopedia The content-free encyclopedia		Undictionary The ick!tionary of all things best left unsaid
	UnTunes Where noisy things can live and prosper		Games Another way to waste time		HowTo Instructions and guides for anything and everything
	UnBooks Content-free books		Unquotable Useless misquotes galore		Uncycloversity If it makes sense, we don't want it
	UnPoetia Poetry for people who hate poetry		UnDebate Debating all the irrelevant issues		UnScripts We can ruin stage and film too
	Why? Don't make me explain it to you twice		UnReviews We'll tell you why things suck		UnBestiary Moo! Grrr! Narf! Harblesnock!
			UnCommons Broken media repository

Uncyclopedia languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 37,394 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:

	Uncyclopedia English United Kingdom 32194	Desciclopédia Português Brazil 55644	アンサイクロペディア 日本語 Japan 20675	Nonsensopedia Polski Poland 18266	Nonciclopedia Italiano Italy 14849
	Désencyclopédie Français France 10073	Inciclopedia Español Spain 5708	偽基百科 正體中文 Taiwan 6652	Uncyclopedia.de Deutsch Germany 14	Hikipedia Suomi Finland 8002
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on May 2, 2019. We know you're doing much better now; we simply can't be bothered.

Other Uncyclopedias

	백괴사전 한국어 South Korea 7103	ไร้สาระนุกรม ไทย Thailand 3473	Pekepedia Tagalog Philippines 276	Bodohpedia Bahasa Melayu Malaysia 143	伪基百科 汉语 Commie China 8411
	איןציקלופדיה עברית Israel 2224	קיינציקלאָפעדיע יידיש Yiddish 11	Tolololpedia Bahasa Indonesia Indonesia 8281	Ndhablek Basa Jawa Java 4	Goblogpedia Basa Sunda Sunda 4
	Yansiklopedi Türkçe Turkey 873	اللاموسوعة العربية Iraq 1329	نانشنامه فارسی Iran 594	ანციკლ ოპედია ქართული Georgia 40	Uncyclopedia.km ភាសាខ្មែរ Cambodia 0
	Spademanns Leksikon Dansk Denmark 9618	Ikkepedia Norsk Norway 4685	Ikkjepedia Norsk (nynorsk) Norway	Psyklopedin Svenska Sweden 2549	Անգրագ իտարան Հայերեն Armenia 26
	Valenciclopèdia Català Andorra 582	Nunyepedia Asturianu Asturias 56	Desgalipedia Galego Galicia 6213	Oisquipèdia Occitan Occitania 47	আনসাইক্ল োপিডিয়া বাংলা Bangladesh 19
	Φρικηπαίδεια Ελληνικά Greece 2853	Scotypedia Scots Scotland 9	Frithchiclipéid Gaeilge Ireland 11	ວິກິພີເດຍ ລາວ Laos 10	Necyclopædia Latina Vatican City 188
	Нециклопедија Српски Serbia 463	Neciklopedija Bosanski Bosnia 27	Neciklopediju Hrvatski Croatia 303	Butalopedija Slovenščina Slovenia 30	Википедија Македонски Macedonia 170
​	Oncyclopedia Nederlands Holland 3082	Kwatsjpedia Limburgs Limburgs 19	Necyklopedie Česky Czech Republic 3971	Necyklopedia Slovenčina Slovakia 1899	Unciklopédia Magyar Hungary 1776
​	Оксипедия Български Bulgaria 258	Neciclopedie Română Romania 174	Uichipedia Молдовеняскэ Moldova 84	Інциклопедія Українська Ukraine 1177	Абсурдопедия Русский Russia 4303
​	Ebatsüklopeedia Eesti Estonia 96	Neciklopēdija Latviešu Latvia 158	Juokopedija Lietuvių Lithuania 276	Neciklopedio Esperanto Esperanto 4720	Unsaiklopedia 𐌲𐌿𐍄𐌹𐍃𐌺‬ Goths 12
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on May 2, 2019. We know you're simply bustling these days, but we simply can't be bothered.

Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and an elite clan of Clinjas.

see also kittens killing killing penquins