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Today's featured article

Iran-you-are-next.jpg

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13 January 2026

N    19:46  User talk:Rabbitude‎‎ 2 changes history +527 [Spike‎ (2×)]
     
19:46 (cur | prev) +221 Spike talk contribs →‎Formula 1: new section
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17:02 (cur | prev) +306 Spike talk contribs {Welcome}
N    18:59  Formula 1‎‎ 3 changes history +2,706 [Rabbitude‎ (3×)]
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18:17 (cur | prev) +137 Rabbitude talk contribs f1
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18:13 (cur | prev) +2,501 Rabbitude talk contribs Formula 1 in a nutshell
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17:46 Abuse filter talk contribs blocked Jude809770656 talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) ‎(Automatically blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Apparent spambot)
     
11:06 Abuse filter talk contribs blocked Polly0553875032 talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) ‎(Automatically blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Apparent spambot)
     
09:42 Abuse filter talk contribs blocked EmmanuelPawlowsk talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) ‎(Automatically blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Apparent spambot)
     
04:44 Abuse filter talk contribs blocked Dann953007 talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) ‎(Automatically blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Apparent spambot)
     17:46  (User creation log) [Rabbitude‎; Polly0553875032‎; Jude809770656‎; EmmanuelPawlowsk‎; Dann953007‎]
     
17:46 User account Jude809770656 talk contribs was created ‎
     
16:24 User account Rabbitude talk contribs was created ‎
     
11:05 User account Polly0553875032 talk contribs was created ‎
     
09:42 User account EmmanuelPawlowsk talk contribs was created ‎
     
04:43 User account Dann953007 talk contribs was created ‎
     17:05  User talk:Rubinya diffhist +329 Spike talk contribs →‎Template:Inci: new section
     17:02  Washington (state)‎‎ 4 changes history -216 [Spike‎; Rabbitude‎ (3×)]
     
17:02 (cur | prev) -94 Spike talk contribs Partly revert Rabbitude, remove navelism
     
16:37 (cur | prev) -337 Rabbitude talk contribs →‎Duvall (Does It Exist?)
     
16:32 (cur | prev) +122 Rabbitude talk contribs →‎Bellevue
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16:30 (cur | prev) +93 Rabbitude talk contribs →‎East Side (Mercer Island, Issaquah and Kirkland)
     16:42  Porsche diffhist +72 Rabbitude talk contribs →‎Typical Porsche Drivers
     16:24 Huff log Spike talk contribs deleted page Labubu(content was: "labubububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububu", and the only contributor was "149.19.46.25" (talk))
     
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     02:12  Template:Inci diffhist +8 Spike talk contribs Change web destination per request on talk page

12 January 2026

     23:34  (Block log) [Abuse filter‎ (2×)]
     
23:34 Abuse filter talk contribs blocked ClaudetteFtw talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) ‎(Automatically blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Apparent spambot)
     
14:22 Abuse filter talk contribs blocked Ambslotknt talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) ‎(Automatically blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Apparent spambot)
     23:34  (User creation log) [Rubinya‎; ClaudetteFtw‎; Ambslotknt‎]
     
23:34 User account ClaudetteFtw talk contribs was created ‎
     
14:22 User account Ambslotknt talk contribs was created ‎
     
03:37 User account Rubinya talk contribs was created ‎ Tags: Mobile edit Mobile web edit
     14:48  User talk:TheLegendaryGlobglogabgalab‎‎ 3 changes history +1,670 [Spike‎; TheLegendaryGlobglogabgalab‎ (2×)]
     
14:48 (cur | prev) +1,050 Spike talk contribs →‎User:TheLegendaryGlobglogabgalab/Globglogabgalab: Not gibberish, but...
     
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N    11:47  User talk:Rubinya diffhist +307 Spike talk contribs {Welcome}
     07:53  Ice diffhist -1 Rubinya talk contribs Tags: Mobile edit Mobile web edit Advanced mobile edit
N    04:48  User:Rubinya diffhist +1,900 Rubinya talk contribs Created page with "==Personal== {{Non-Wikipedian}}{{User:Anotherpongo/User Is Toilet}}{{user girl}}{{user girl femme}}{{Adult Body}}{{User OAP}}{{user homoflexable}}{{user girlfriend wish}}{{use..." Tags: Mobile edit Mobile web edit Advanced mobile edit

11 January 2026

     21:53  (Block log) [Spike‎ (2×); Abuse filter‎ (2×)]
     
21:53 Abuse filter talk contribs blocked Singha89ex talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) ‎(Automatically blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Apparent spambot)
     
20:38 Spike talk contribs blocked 71.183.205.98 talk with an expiration time of 2 weeks (anonymous users only, account creation disabled, email disabled, cannot edit own talk page) ‎(Vandal)
     
20:36 Spike talk contribs blocked 47.230.106.33 talk with an expiration time of 2 weeks (anonymous users only, account creation disabled, email disabled, cannot edit own talk page) ‎(Very junky edits)
     
14:27 Abuse filter talk contribs blocked AurelioWarman talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) ‎(Automatically blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Apparent spambot)
     21:53  (User creation log) [Singha89ex‎; EarnestVanOtterl‎; ColumbusKates‎; AurelioWarman‎]
     
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     21:00 Huff log Spike talk contribs deleted page User talk:AurelioWarman(Mass deletion of pages added by 71.183.205.98)
     03:25  Template:Doctor Who diffhist +6 OnePunch talk contribs
     03:20  List of New Doctor Who episodes diffhist +14,170 OnePunch talk contribs 12th Doctor episodes

10 January 2026

     22:00  (Huff log) [Spike‎ (3×)]
     
22:00 Spike talk contribs deleted page Willy on wheels(Mass deletion of pages added by 2607:FB90:3714:106D:56BE:37E2:9C24:7110)
     
22:00 Spike talk contribs deleted page Willy on WheeIs(Mass deletion of pages added by 2607:FB90:3714:106D:56BE:37E2:9C24:7110)
     
22:00 Spike talk contribs deleted page Talk:Willy on wheels(Mass deletion of pages added by 2607:FB90:3714:106D:56BE:37E2:9C24:7110)
     21:25 Block log Spike talk contribs blocked 2607:fb90:3714:106d::/64 talk with an expiration time of 2 weeks (anonymous users only, account creation disabled, email disabled, cannot edit own talk page) ‎(Vandal)

(continued...)

Recently featured: Gay Pride - Super Smash Bros: Xtreme Beach Volleyball - Ernest Hemingway's Cookery Corner - See Dick - Neolithic Age

Did you know...

*... that telling someone you masturbated to their Facebook picture is frowned upon in society?
  • ... on the nth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me a total of Did you know-nth day of Christmas.png gifts?
  • ... that telling someone you masturbated to their Facebook picture is frowned upon in society?
  • ... on the nth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me a total of Did you know-nth day of Christmas.png gifts?

In the news


On this day...

WARNING! May cause choking in children over 40.

January 13: New Year's Eve for Julius Caesar Fans Who Insist on Using His Calender Instead of Ours

  • 1437 - German bakers afflicted with St. Vitus Dance create pretzels by flinging dough around. Unfortunately, brewers are unable to take advantage as waiters are similarly afflicted and spill all the beer. Thousands die from choking on dry pretzels.
  • 1582 - The Orthodox Church refuses to adopt the Gregorian calendar, making Christmas in July a real possibility. Hardware chain stores leave the Orthodox Church in droves, as they already had new calendars printed.
  • 1610 - Galileo Galilei discovers the fourth satellite of Jupiter and names it "Shit", unaware that "Uranus" would have been a better choice for stupid jokes by the devoted followers of Captain Obvious.
  • 1774 - Ireland is violently liberated from Apaches. After thinking about it, panicked Brits ask the Apaches to return, but it is too late as the last removal van had already left for America.
  • 1830 - A devastating fire burns large parts of New Orleans to the ground. Hurricane Katrina helps extinguish the last remaining flames 175 years later. FEMA would then spread metallic sodium to absorb floodwaters and start fires all over again.
  • 1874 - Thomas Edison patents the pneumatic kitten extruder, which gains widespread success in new Chinese markets.
  • 1932 - A street vendor sees Dali's The Persistence of Memory and tries to sell melted pocket watches on the street. That idea fails completely. However, he find the watches perfect for baking large pretzels and invents the soft pretzel. The rest is mystery.
  • 1942 - Henry Ford gets a patent for his new automobile, which runs efficiently on Jew blood and diesel.
  • 2002 - President George W. Bush faints after choking on a pretzel, which will be remembered as the defining moment of his presidency. In a completely unrelated move, President Bush signs a bill forcing all pretzel companies to post the notice "DANGER: PRETZELS MAY BE HAZARDOUS TO YOUR HEALTH" on their packages in large red letters. However, the president fails to read the new packages and chokes again. Barbara Bush would then arrange to have all his food pre-chewed and put into a funnel to feed the president.

Today's featured picture

Floatingpancake.jpg

THIS IMAGE is too crappy to be featured. Eat it today.

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Writer and Noob of the Month

me
Writer of the month.png
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward.png
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared.png
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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see also kittens killing killing penquins