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Today's featured article List of abbreviations: N This edit created a new page (also see list of new pages) m This is a minor edit b This edit was performed by a bot (±123) The page size changed by this number of bytes 3 February 2026      06:32  (Block log)‎ [Abuse filter‎ (2×)]       06:32 Abuse filter talk contribs blocked AdelaideFreitas talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) ‎(Automatically blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Apparent spambot)       01:38 Abuse filter talk contribs blocked KrystleFabro5 talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) ‎(Automatically blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Apparent spambot)      06:31  (User creation log)‎ [PeteSpenniman‎; KrystleFabro5‎; AdelaideFreitas‎]       06:31 User account AdelaideFreitas talk contribs was created ‎       04:51 User account PeteSpenniman talk contribs was created ‎       01:38 User account KrystleFabro5 talk contribs was created ‎ N    05:07  User:PeteSpenniman/My keyboard is missing its homerow (unobfuscated)‎ diffhist +2,255‎ PeteSpenniman talk contribs Created page with "{{title|My keyboard is missing its homerow}} I just bought this keyboard, see? It's a cool keyboard for what it's worth but its homerow is missing. This makes it extremely dif..."  m   05:02  My keyboard is missing its homerow‎ diffhist +1‎ PeteSpenniman talk contribs 2 February 2026      16:19  User talk:Gergdown‎ diffhist +328‎ Spike talk contribs →‎Vandal patrol: new section      16:17  User rights log Spike talk contribs changed group membership for Gergdown from (none) to autopatrolled ‎(Probably not a vandal)      16:00  Huff log Spike talk contribs deleted page Uncyclopedia talk:Vandalism is pointless ‎(Mass deletion of pages added by 146.70.98.22)      15:44  User talk:Spike‎‎ 5 changes history 0‎ [Spike‎; 2600:1012:B0B7:617C:153:D040:C039:24EE‎; 146.70.98.22‎ (3×)]       15:44 (cur | prev) -703‎ Spike talk contribs RV       14:15 (cur | prev) +52‎ 2600:1012:B0B7:617C:153:D040:C039:24EE talk Tag: Anon edited userspace or made big deletion       12:51 (cur | prev) +82‎ 146.70.98.22 talk →‎important request: new section Tag: Anon edited userspace or made big deletion       12:32 (cur | prev) +188‎ 146.70.98.22 talk Tag: Anon edited userspace or made big deletion       12:30 (cur | prev) +381‎ 146.70.98.22 talk →‎lllllllllllolololotrollollllalhhahahahhahhaslurrrypy diarrhrhrrhhrheaaaa: new section Tag: Anon edited userspace or made big deletion      15:41  Block log Spike talk contribs blocked 146.70.98.22 talk with an expiration time of 2 weeks (anonymous users only, account creation disabled, email disabled, cannot edit own talk page) ‎(Vandal)      14:51  Uncyclopedia:VFP/100AcreSuspects.jpg‎ diffhist -170‎ Gergdown talk contribs ←Undid revision 6228514 by 146.70.98.22 (talk) Tag: Undo      14:51  Uncyclopedia:VFP/Godpissed.png‎ diffhist -170‎ Gergdown talk contribs ←Undid revision 6228515 by 146.70.98.22 (talk) Tag: Undo      14:50  Uncyclopedia:VFP/Jarhead3.jpg‎ diffhist -170‎ Gergdown talk contribs ←Undid revision 6228516 by 146.70.98.22 (talk) Tag: Undo      14:49  Uncyclopedia:VFP/MichaelSatanMonkeyDarwin.jpg‎ diffhist -170‎ Gergdown talk contribs ←Undid revision 6228517 by 146.70.98.22 (talk) Tag: 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Recently featured: Gay Pride - Super Smash Bros: Xtreme Beach Volleyball - Ernest Hemingway's Cookery Corner - See Dick - Neolithic Age Did you know... *... that Killing Joke, the band that performed the song Eighties, are now in their eighties? ... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective? ... that Killing Joke, the band that performed the song Eighties, are now in their eighties? ... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective? ... that Killing Joke, the band that performed the song Eighties, are now in their eighties?	In the news Trump breaks the Mustache Mafia (pictured) Hegseth orders drone attack on Santa Claus Trump renames Christmas Uncyclopedia implements funny ban Miley Cyrus lends her wrecking ball to Donald Trump Prince Andrew to go into permanent exile John Bolton is indicted Florida to use Cracker Barrels as immigration checkpoints Flying Dildos dominate the WNBA Epstein list emerges Miss England to Miss World: I'm out Qatar gifts Trump an airplane Popeye deported for gang-related tattoos DOGE calls on Uncyclopedia Weezer gets weird at Trump's inauguration On this day... February 3: Go Fuck a Groundhog Day c.1200 BCE - Groundhogs are worshipped by the Mayans, whereas they are just your chubby little run-of-the-mill pyramid-building rodents from outer space with godlike powers. 532 BCE - Groundhogs take in laundry to make ends meet, beginning their own Iron Age. 235 - The Moon is invented by rogue cave dwelling ducks from South Africa. 947 - Doughnut-worshipping groundhogs change their name to woodchucks to avoid religious persecution. 1194 - Saladin I gets it on with Pandhragati Phil, a local groundhog, causing it to snow in Arabia. 1806 - The chickens come home to Roost. Residents of Roost get tired of eating eggs very quickly. 1903 - Inspired by hearing a story about how Theodore Roosevelt refuses to shoot a bear on the grounds that it was injured and elderly, and besides, "it's no fun if they can't run fast enough to almost make it before I blow their brains out", Morris Michtom and his wife Rose introduce the first teddy bear in America. It would later attempt to assassinate Roosevelt. 1942 - Singapore falls. Denmark trips, but says he's all right and gets up again. 1992 - Prefix "e-" is invented. Kitten death rate triples. 1995 - Bill Murray repeats himself while learning about Uber and Lyft drivers. 1996 - Bill Murray humps Andie MacDowell again. 2012 - SOPA passes, internet ends.
Today's featured picture [vote] GreatWaveOffFukushima.png GreatWaveOffFukushima.png - 9 blow(s) by friendly tentacle monster and Mecha Kitty to vestiges of Imperial pride and common Japanese decency ( 10 / 1 ) Artist's depiction of the 2011 Fukushima Daichii Nuclear Power Plant Disaster. What it really looked like off the coast of Japan. The Great Wave Off Fukushima. color woodcut. 1823,1930,2011-12. Part of The Thirty-six Glows From Plant Daichii series by 250 year old Ukiyo-e (and recently loli) artist Katsushika Hokusai. The Great Wave of Fukushima is part of a groundbreaking new series of remastered prints that comprise the (evidently immortal) artist's comment on both the tragedy of the recent disaster at Fukushima and what he (not exactly a traditionalist himself in his younger days) believes "is representative of the cultural degradation, excess, and perverse fantasy of Japanese today - as well as some floating sushi". Image credit: MeepStarLives
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Writer and Noob of the Month me GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia! Seriously, we love you. Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor. Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come! It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon! HEIL FROSTY! Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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see also kittens killing killing penquins