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Today's featured article

Iran-you-are-next.jpg

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30 December 2025

     03:09  (User creation log) [VernJolley89‎; FaeWhelan294‎; สล็อต‎]
     
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01:15 Abuse filter talk contribs blocked สล็อต talk contribs with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) ‎(Automatically blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Apparent spambot)
     00:46  UnNews:Trump renames Christmas diffhist +82 Spike talk contribs Dateline--Trump would surely have renamed D.C. as well. Unaffordability possibly the observer's fault

29 December 2025

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     15:42  Uncyclopedia:Requested articles/Social sciences/Politics and government‎‎ 5 changes history +428 [Simsilikesims‎ (5×)]
     
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In the news


On this day...

Always Kills Governments, Always!

December 30: Last Chance To Do All the Things You Wanted To Do This Year Day

  • 4004 BCE - God remembers to create the Earth. Oh, and everything else, too. Except for sliced bread.
  • 4 BCE - Emperor Augustus remembers he was gonna have a census this year. Having missed his opportunity, he proclaims, "Let there be a day upon which all things previously contemplated throughout the last year finally be at once accomplished! Except for tomorrow. But shhhh!" Thus, the "Last Chance to Do All The Things You Wanted To Do This Year Day" is inaugurated.
  • 41 CE - Calligraphy, the gayest of Roman emperors, forgets to sign the will making his goat the next emperor, thus ensuring the slavery of goats for two and a half millennia.
  • 1037 - King Arthur loses the Holy Grail to Nigerian timeshare scammers. Crusades ensue.
  • 1928 - The fart is discovered to be a wave not a particle since two people at two different places can smell it at the same time.
  • 1999 - Procrastinators think about preparing for the Y2K Bug.
  • 2004 - Weren't we gonna start a parody of Wickerpedialyte? Yeah? Shit! Better luck next year.
  • 2005 - the letter u is now a bad word. Prince gets writer's block for about five minutes.
  • 2006 - Saddam Hussein is executed for forgetting to send Bush a Christmas card. Again.
  • 2007 - This entry is not added. Except in error, and other minor US towns.
  • 2012 -- The Mayans remember to end the world with a BANG!
  • 2017 - Wal★Mart sends in the Giant Smiley to crush the government of Botswana in order to create one giant store next to the redneck country South Africa. (pictured)
  • 2541 - Goats obtain their freedom, thus changing December 30 from "Last Chance To Do All The Things You Wanted To Do This Year Day" to "Goatcheese Liberation Front and Gift Packet Day" (except in New Guinea).

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Writer and Noob of the Month

me
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GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


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Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


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It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!


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see also kittens killing killing penquins