UnBooks:See Dick

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See Dick is a time-tested method of teaching children to read. Can you read this?

See Dick?

Chapter One: Meet Dick and Lynne

See Dick.
See Dick play. See Dick ride a bike. "This is fun," says Dick.
See Lynne. See Lynne run. See Lynne run fast. "This is fun," says Lynne.
See Liz. See Spot. See Liz and Spot. "I like to play with Spot," says Liz.
See Mary. See Mary hide. "Where is Mary?" asks Lynne. "Where is Mary?" asks Dick. "Let's look in the closet! There is Mary. Look, we have found Mary hiding in the closet."

Chapter Two: Dick Meets Tricky Dick

See Dick. He is going to work. Dick works at the White House. Work, work, work. Dick works for Tricky Dick.
See Tricky Dick wreck the 18 minute long tape.
See Tricky Dick, he is not a crook. Crook, crook, crook.

Chapter Three: More Fun with Dick and Lynne

See Dick grab his chest. See Dick turn blue. See Dick sweat. "What is wrong, Dick? asks Lynne. "Why are you turning blue?"
See Dick in the hospital. Dick is very sick. Dick's heart attacked him. Dick's heart hurt him.
See the doctor. He is surprised! He found that Dick has a heart! Everyone is surprised!
See the doctor tell Dick that he will get better, but that the second, third and fourth heart attacks, will each hurt even more. "Ouch," says Dick. "Ouch," says Lynne. "Ouch," says Liz. "Ouch," says Mary.
See Dick leave the hospital. See Dick wave goodbye. "Goodbye," says Dick.

Chapter Four: Watch Us Grow!

See Dick?
See Dick out of a job. See Dick pout. Pout, Dick, pout.
See Bill and Hillary. They have moved into the White House. Crooks, crooks, crooks!
See Mary. See Mary pet Jane's kitty. Jane's kitty is fun to play with. "This is hot," says Mary.
See Lynne. Lynne is calling Mrs. Bush. "Can George come and play with Dick?" asks Lynne. "Yes," says Laura. "George can come and play with Dick."

Chapter Five: Watch Us Play!

See George. See Dick. See them play. They are playing house. Play, play, play.
See Katherine. Katherine is from Florida. Katherine likes to play with Mommy's make-up. Katherine likes to pretend that she is the Secretary of State of Florida.
See Dick and George. Dick is playing Daddy. George is playing Mommy.
"See George, this is fun," says Dick. "This is fun?" asks George. "Yes, this is fun," says Dick.

Chapter Six: See Dick Run

See Dick. Dick has ambitions. "I am a Neo-Con," says Dick.
See George run. See Dick run. They are racing Albert. Each of them wants to win. Each of them wants to impress Katherine.
See Albert and George heading toward the finish. Which one won? "George won," says Katherine.
See Albert. Albert is unhappy. He thought he won. He knew he won. But Katherine likes George better than Albert.

Chapter Seven: A New House

See George. See Dick. They live in the White House. "This is fun," says George. "You bet," says Dick.
See Karl. Karl is very tricky. Karl likes George. George likes to finger-paint.
See Dick and Karl conspire while George plays. Dick and Karl are planning a surprise.
See Dick and Karl tell George about their surprise. George is happy. George is going to get to play war. War, war, war.
See George ask, "Why are we going to war?" "Over yellow cake," says Dick. "The Nigerians have yellow cake. They want to share it with Saddam." No, no, no!

Chapter Eight: War Games

Bang, bang, bang.
See George. George is telling all of his friends about the cake. Cake, cake, cake.
See Dick. Dick is telling everyone that Saddam doesn't need cake. Dick is telling everyone that Saddam is foreign and is out to hurt Mommy and Daddy. No, no, no!
See George start the war. See Dick hide. Where is Dick? Where is Lynne? Where is Liz? Where is Mary?
See Saddam. He is in a hole. A small, dark hole. He has no cake. "But he could have had cake," says Dick.
See mommies and daddies. They are crying. Saddam didn't hurt them. Dick and his war killed their little boys and girls. Everybody is sad. But Dick doesn't care. "War means job security," says Dick.

Chapter Nine: Dick is a Big Shot

See Dick. Dick has a shotgun. He is in Texas. He is going hunting.
See Dick's friend Harry. Harry is wearing orange. Harry is wearing BRIGHT ORANGE.
See Dick take aim. See Dick shoot. Oh, no! Dick has hurt Harry.
See Dick, he wants to keep the shooting a secret. See Mrs. Armstrong. She is going to tell the press.
See Dick fly off and hide. Where is Dick?

Chapter Ten: Let's Play Make-Believe!

See Dick. Dick has a secret. What could Dick's secret be?
See Mrs. Armstong. See Mr. Wittington. See Mr. Press Secretary.
See them all. They are covering up for Dick. But where is Dick? Dick is not accountable to anyone.
See Dick. Dick is above the Constitution. Dick is above everyone and everything.
See Dick. See Dick run the United States. "This is fun," says Dick.

The End

Next week's lesson:

See Dick See You (In the Privacy of Your Own Home)

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