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Today's featured article – St. Pierre and Miquelon

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St. Pierre and Michelob (technically, the Territorial Collectivity of Saint Pierre et Michelob; French: Collectivité territoriale de Saint-Pierre-et-Michelob), is an archipelago of small islands off the coast of eastern Canada, the main islands being St. Pierre and Michelob, south of the Canadian province of Newfoundland and Labatt. The islands come within 10 km of Newfoundland.

Within France, the archipelago has the status of "territorial collectivity" because it sounds more dignified than "neglected islands". Its residents are French citizens; they elect one Deputy to the National Assembly — though, in view of the territory's population (6,008 as of the 2016 census, which was thereafter disbanded), he is only allowed to vote on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. They are also allowed to hold opinions on Senator and President.

St. Pierre and Michelob is all that is left of the once-sprawling North American empire of "New France". (Quebec aspires to the same status, but every time Parisians hear that accent, they are glad they cut them loose.) Acadia broke ties with the territory when it became evident that the islanders were even lazier and more cowardly than the Acadians. It is notable for being France's only remaining possession in North America, and if France washes its hands too, it will not have any notability. (more...)

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Previously featured article – Minotaur

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The Minotaur was a half-human, half-bull creature in Greek mythology. Rather than a domestic cow, the bovine parent was an auroch, now extinct, as opposed to an auror, which is hoped to be extinct. The tale is probably a manifestation of man’s historic fascination with cow sex. The odd combination of species stands as proof of Creationism, though not by the usual expected deity. (more...)

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November 2: All Soul Food Day

  • 30 - Jesus Christ gives his first public performance, with supporting act Judas Iscariot and his Breakdancing Badgers.
  • 1687 - Exactly the same events happen on this day as they will on July 2nd, 1991.
  • 1765 - James Brown eats his soul, hence All Soul Food Day is declared. Satan is supposedly interested.
  • 1896 - Queen Victoria consumes the soul of George Washington and as a result, invents the iron testicle. The occasion of her death will be marked by the invention of the steam testicle.
  • 1889 - The tallest man in the world destroys Great Yarmouth by taking two steps east. It still hasn't been rebuilt.
  • 1982 - Countdown starts early and students are happy, throwing away David Dickinson into a pile of trash, which sparks his love for antiques.
  • 1987 - Pismo Beach is wiped out by a tsunami. Bugs Bunny is grateful he took a left at Albuquerque.
  • 1997 - Where the fuck is Wycliffe?
  • 2007 - Tokyo has had enough of this shit and decides to blow up everything on the planet. In an ironic twist, Tokyo destroys Tokyo. Will Smith survives.
  • 2015 - Mr T returns the souls of all those he has ever pitied; realizing he has lost his powers, he goes on a pitying spree and brings humanity to the brink of extinction.
  • 2016 - Mr T saves the human race by having sex with every women on the planet.
  • 2237 - George Jetson dies. His boy Elroy is unable to attend. Daughter Judy's husband, Punch, delivers the eulogy. Jane, his wife, is devastated. Due to time issues, The Flintstones are unable to attend.

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Exclusive PLUS member of the Month!!!

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GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


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Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


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It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!


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