Babel:El

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Καλωσήρθατε στην Ανεγκυκλοπαίδεια, την ελεύθερη εγκυκλοπαίδεια που οποιοσδήποτε μπορεί να επεξεργαστεί.


Προτού αρχίσετε την επεξεργασία, παρακαλώ διαβάστε τον Οδηγό για Αρχάριους και ρίξτε μια ματιά στο ψυχολογικό μας τεστ.
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Today's featured article – Chess pieces

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Chess is often thought of as a game for pretentious tossers, and for teenage nerds in need of a competitive pastime that doesn’t necessarily end with them being wedgied. But this image is outdated. These days the game is also played by boxers desperate to show that repeated brain trauma has not affected their intelligence.

Though some rules of the game have been adapted slowly over the millennia, the pieces have remained mostly unchanged and continue to move in much the same way as they did for intellectual wannabes in ancient India, friendless geeks in Sassanid Persia, and social inadequates in Moorish Spain.

When a game begins, each side starts with eight pawns (Australian English: Shrimps) - twelve short of a barbie. As the least valuable and most expendable member of your army, your pawns should be assigned a place in the front rank of the infantry. Do not waste body-armour or weapons on these grunts. Advanced players use terror and centuries of oppression to compel their pawns to advance unarmed and unarmoured across the open battlefield, even in the face of airborne attack from the Rooks. (more...)

Previously featured article – John Mahama

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John Dramani Mahama (born 29 November 1958) is the 12th and 14th President of Ghana, his current term having begun on 7 January 2025. Ghanaian voters were inspired by Donald Trump being both the 45th and 47th U.S. President and anxious to prove that Ghana could do it too. They were also ready for another go, having had four years to recover from Mahama's first Presidency. (more...)

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Selected anniversaries

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June 4: International Deserved Child Abuse Victim Day and International Celebrate Yesterday Day

  • 1452Christopher Columbus is outvoted on naming the Santa Maria, The Shitbag.
  • 1453 – Columbus sells children into sex slavery, starting an American tradition. It will ensure an unending supply of future mass murderers so that newsfeeds will have something to write about.
  • 1776Thomas Jefferson asks for his first two-week extension on the Declaration of Independence.
  • 1863 – Rain causes International Celebrate Yesterday Day to be put off until the next day; mass confusion results.
  • 1900 – John Jefferson of Oak Ridge, PA awakes from forty-year sleep. He dies of asphyxiation inside his coffin.
  • 1942 – The Battle of Midway begins with a surprise attack on Konami. (pictured)
  • 1946 – The father of Donald Trump screams at his son on a regular basis, creating the president we know and love today.
  • 1976 – Americans celebrate the bicentennial of Thomas Jefferson asking for his first two-week extension on the Declaration of Independence.
  • 1980 – Every child abuse offender is released in Texas due to prison overcrowding and a decline in child abuse.
  • 1989 – Many young people are gleefully beaten, killed, and abused in the Tiananmen Square massacre.
  • 2006 – June 3rd, 2006 is celebrated despite it being International Celebrate Tomorrow Day.
  • 2013Republicans and nostalgists yearn for the good old days of killer influenza and other fatal diseases, as well as incessant war; they prove not to be satisfied with just the latter today.

Archived Anniversaries

Writer and Noob of the Month

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GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


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Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


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It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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