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St. Pierre and Michelob (technically, the Territorial Collectivity of Saint Pierre et Michelob; French: Collectivité territoriale de Saint-Pierre-et-Michelob), is an archipelago of small islands off the coast of eastern Canada, the main islands being St. Pierre and Michelob, south of the Canadian province of Newfoundland and Labatt. The islands come within 10 km of Newfoundland.
Within France, the archipelago has the status of "territorial collectivity" because it sounds more dignified than "neglected islands". Its residents are French citizens; they elect one Deputy to the National Assembly — though, in view of the territory's population (6,008 as of the 2016 census, which was thereafter disbanded), he is only allowed to vote on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. They are also allowed to hold opinions on Senator and President.
St. Pierre and Michelob is all that is left of the once-sprawling North American empire of "New France". (Quebec aspires to the same status, but every time Parisians hear that accent, they are glad they cut them loose.) Acadia broke ties with the territory when it became evident that the islanders were even lazier and more cowardly than the Acadians. It is notable for being France's only remaining possession in North America, and if France washes its hands too, it will not have any notability. (more...)
Previously featured article – Minotaur
The Minotaur was a half-human, half-bull creature in Greek mythology. Rather than a domestic cow, the bovine parent was an auroch, now extinct, as opposed to an auror, which is hoped to be extinct. The tale is probably a manifestation of man’s historic fascination with cow sex. The odd combination of species stands as proof of Creationism, though not by the usual expected deity. (more...)
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Did you know...
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- ...that Santa has somehow delivered presents to all the people in the world every christmas, even though the laws of physics dictate that he would be an incinerated and crushed pile of ashes by now, along with all his reindeer?
- ...that Santa, when his name is scrambled, is Satan?
- ...even though he's a magical and kindhearted person?
- ...and that the elves are revolting against Santa?
- ...that Santa doesn't care about you? In fact, nobody cares?
- ...and that Santa does care about and love everyone else in the world?
- ...that reindeer are never magical?
- ...that even though he has a whole bunch of elves working for him, Santa does shopping for presents all the time?
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In the news
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- Santa has gone crazy. Even more than before. (Pictured)
- Grandma gets run over by a reindeer.
- Mandatory elf gathering goes horribly wrong
- While making presents, Santa falls in the wrapping machinery
- The reindeer veer off track while deivering presents
- Santa fails to remember getting the flying powder before entering the sleigh
- Santa's elves lose some of the presents they made; expect delays
- Santa's present-making machinery malfunctions and goes haywire; many elves die
- Easter comes on Christmas; millions confused
- Santa revealed to be ordinary person with immortality potion
- Elves revealed to be robots; noone knows what to think anymore
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On this day...
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December 18: Dumb as Dirt Day, Page Protection App... pp... ree... shee... a... tion... Day
- In the beginning - God creates dirt as a benchmark for intelligence. Little did he know that humans would crack coconuts using their heads for over 4 millennia before making tools by copying chimpanzees.
- 1856 - 1856 is invented for living purposes.
- 1878 -
Superman Papa Stalin materializes in what is known as Georgia, using the power of his mustache.
- 1897 - Genghis Khan comes back as a zombie looking for revenge. Instead, he finds feeding ducks in the park far more fun than revenge.
- 1967 - Earth forgets what day it is.
- 1985 - Hindus celebrate Christmas, with Ganesha briefly getting stuck in several chimneys.
- 1991 - The usage of I is banned due to extreme plagiarism and intellectual property rights..
- 1994 - Michael St_pe loses h_s rel_g_on. He offers $500 for _ts safe return, NO QUEST_ONS ASKED!
- 1999 - O.J. S_mpson cont_nues the hunt for M_chael St_pe's rel_g_on.
- 2001 - Apple copyryghts the letter I, other letters are to be substytuted yndefynytely. Mankynd becomes Welsh.
- 2002 - Wikipedia creates a bot to do autocorrection. Another bot is made to do page protection to detect and fix vandalism changes. The two bots would fight it out for 15 years over the same 3 articles, the first example of artificial stupid.
- 2005 - The Fox Bros. Network wrongly announces the death of Slappy Squirrel.
- 2010 - THE U.S. Congress authorizes $1.1 billion for the purchase of two bots from Wikipedia to revise and protect important documents. North Korea and Russia immediately shut down their cyber attack departments, announcing they are no longer needed.
- 2256 - The Great Catnip incident occurs, nearly wiping out the Earth.
- 3013 - God realizes he made a big mistake with the Earth and replaces it with a potted plant.
- 1998 - Uncyclopedia users fail to understand the linear nature of a timeline.
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| Colonization of the Week
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For the glory of her majesty
Help us clear the ivy of crap,
and plant the seeds of humour.
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Today's featured picture
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As you enjoy this Christmas holiday safe at home with your family, please remember the brave men and women who gave their lives in the name of Christmas spirit.
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Writer and Noob of the Month
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- Santa's newest creation, the Elveatron 5000, has written many works of art full of creativity and cunning, and so has earned the title of Writer of the Month.
- Now, how can a robot generate such wonderful writing? Well, Santa programs the robot to generate random strings of letters, numbers, and other characters at insanely fast speeds (1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 per second, in fact) and Santa then picks out the strings that look the best and puts them on Uncyclopedia as presents to all Uncyclopedia users.
- Isn't Santa wonderful?
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Rudolph has recently gone crazy and made really noobish and bad edits recently. So, we've given him the honorary title of Noob of the month. Yes, Rudolph may have guided Santa and his sleigh on those foggy Christmas Eves, but he was taking his medicine then. He yesterday refused to take his medicine and now he is throwing chairs at people and mauling them, and he is making bad edits on Uncyclopedia. OH GOD THERE HE IS NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...!
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Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners
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