Superboi
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Superboi was born on the planet Krypton under the assumed name Meera; Zor'el. After reaching Earth, Meera; Zor'el hired a retired porn actor to take on the pseudonym of Meera; Zor'el. Through advanced technology stolen from the Guardians, Meeral uses internet chat rooms to turn himself into Superboi. She also changes hishair colour frequently to keep his identify secret.
Powers and Abilities[edit]
Superboi has the ability to project massive amounts of sexual frustration on grown women and boys between the age of 16 and 23. This power was first demonstrated in Action Comics #60 when he single handedly caused riots in comic shops across the United States and Australia.
His ass exerts a mesmeric effect on people and he can anesthetize people with hisbutt, his Super Sari causes everyone to not associate his appearances as Superboi with Meeral Syal.
In addition, the ability to generate atomic energy out of hisbutt through eating criminals, such as Lex Luthor, (and innocent bystanders on a few occasions, when he really, really needed the methane, was starving to death, or needed the huge belly to do fetish porn to earn badly needed funds for the Justice league) has enabled him to keep planets where the nearby star has died warm until his wife can haul a star by from elsewhere. After eating criminals, they and converted into to methane. It is believed he converts all her bodily waste into various gases, except of a few occasion when he eats several thousand tons of "food" in one sitting, after which, he produces a huge crap. Unless he has a stomach virus, Superboi will frequently poop out "Good People" from the villains he eats; however they are slightly les likley to be all that nice or even made ate all if he completely digests them. Good people who are digested often come back as bad tempered, violent, or downright evil. They have a level of amnesia so they forget their unusual "birth," except for lesbians with whom she films having sex with (check out her website, even if Vore doesn't turn you on, her dieting plan REALLY works). If you wish to know how it is possible to form a good person out of methane gas, go look up science, the link is right there, here it is again, science, now go figure it out yourself! In addition to good people, Superboi has created at least two supervillain teams out of his ingested innocent Bystanders. Luckily the first team was quickly killed when they set up their base on a Nuclear Testing Range, and the second was made up entirely of Patrick Stewart Clones.
When asked about hisingestion of innocents, she stated,
“Of course I feel bad! I'm a freaking superhero, I'm supposed to save people, when someone innocent finds their way into my gut, I could stab myself in the eye with kryptonite! But once the digestion starts I get the best Orgasm you'll ever hear of...Perhaps Nickelodeon didn't need to hear that.”
He also posseses flying and Superhuman strength, but who really cares?
Superboi Today[edit]
In between crimefighting Superboi spends most of his time living under the alias of Meeral Syal with his wife who is really Wonder Woman - a comedy duo explains the sudden absences and strange pre-occupation with rushing into revolving doors or Telephone Boxes and sudden disappearances, these are all explained as being tricks done with the assistance of David Copperfield (real name Spiderman).
He earns a living as a BDSM top.
Protest[edit]
In 2005, there was a massive Protest regarding Superboi. Hundreds world wide believed a massively gassy, man-eating and sex crazed hero was a terrible choice for a world wide icon and hero to children.
Superboi at first took it all in good humour, as he had repeatedly admitted to his sex addiction. However, it became evident that the Protesters were serious when he was bombarded with Kryptonite, well actually it was green erasers, but when it's the only thing that can kill you, you tend to cautious about it.
When it was outright stated that Superboi was a menace like the dreaded Spider-Man, arch enemy to the much loved, if a bit violent, Venom, Superboi took matters into his own hands. He tried numerous ways to regain trust. The main campaign she tried was "The Beauty of the Belly" Campaign, which comprised of attractive pictures of his with a baddy digesting away.
Eventually, when the Government was forced to give them legal permission to use a "Kryptonite Cannon" (so long as it hit "near" him, it was classed as an accident), the entire protest mysteriously vanished. When asked for comment, Superboi mereley remarked,
“I wouldn't have any 'Urrrrp! idea where they'd have gotten to. Now if you excuse me, I've gotta take a HUGE dump.”
For seven weeks, New Jersey was flooded with shit, but it was New Jersey, so who gives a what it was flooded with?
Important Events[edit]
- In the landmark Supreme Court case Superboi v. Nixon, it was established that Super flatulence during a presidential address could be considered as acceptable comment in circumstances in which the President later turned out to be a total hypocrite. The identity of one of of the informants on Watergate was discovered during this incident; Deep Throat was not discovered, but the identity of Deep Nose was later discovered after he died from inhalation of noxious gases.
- There are a variety of UN Resolutions out against him - one instructing him to watch where he is sitting after he accidentally crushed one woman to death, another banning him from eating baked beans anywhere on planet Earth after he accidentally vaporised a Pacific Island with a Super Fart (originally thought to be due to an illegal French Atomic Weapons test).
- I'm doing Superboi right now, and it's true, he reeks! But that's fine and kinky, he's also digesting my husband... he was a bitch.
- Superboi once heated the planet while the sun is extinguished (see picture above) and Wonder Woman puts a new star in it's place, but overdose it due to a Bean Burrito and creates Global Warming.
- Superboi and his friend Carl tried to figure out a cool catchphrase for him They give up after criminals couldn't care less about being eaten after he confronted them saying,
“Mess with the law, you get a farting on!”
- Superboi tried to release his own fragrance, but apparently smelling like twenty four billion people farted with a force of quadruple their numbers on you, isn't such a popular trend.
Quotes[edit]
“Villains! You face male supermodelesque gassy justice!”
“My butt is nice and round, feel it!”
“I farted. YUM.”
“I like "justice"!”
“Hey creep, stop lookin' at my ass. my belly is over here! Stop lookin' at my belly, my eyes are up here!”
“Yummy, yummy, yummy I've got 20 bad guys in my huge tummy, and I think I'm gonna chuck.”
“Yes, I was married to Wonderwoman. Why'd we break it off? Lets just say that she's looser than a Speeding Bullet.”
“Why don't people take me seriously? If I can't fart, eat people then poop them out or show off my vore-belly and ass to distract evil doers, then how do I protect the world?...Lets ignore my Superstrength and flight for a second, kay?”
See also[edit]
- Flatulence
- Masturbation
- Fetish
- Vore
- Supergirl his twin sister
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