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The Article Which Makes the Present Feature

Today's featured article – Minotaur

The Minotaur was a half-human, half-bull creature in Greek mythology. Rather than a domestic cow, the bovine parent was an auroch, now extinct, as opposed to an auror, which is hoped to be extinct. The tale is probably a manifestation of man’s historic fascination with cow sex. The odd combination of species stands as proof of Creationism, though not by the usual expected deity.

The monster's given name was Asterix, suggested by some visiting Celts from Gaul.

The beast is typically described in painting and sculpture as having a human body and a bull's head. Some writers have described him the other way around. Considering the combinations possible, it is a wonder that the Minotaur didn't end up as an amalgamation of two different butts.

Experts in Greek mythology suspect that if the Minotaur were born female, then the Borden's company would have adopted its mascot and symbol much, much earlier. The storyline would also then have been much different. Historians agree that the tale would have ended up as some sort of lesbian fanfic, which is within the canon of the soap opera that is Greek mythology. (more...)

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Previously featured article – The Witcher

The Witcher is a short story series/fantasy book saga/role-playing game/Netflix television show. It is set a time period of Medieval knights, monsters, fantastical beings and a lot of magic. If you can imagine a mix of Conan the Barbarian, Game of Thrones and the legends of King Arthur then you will be getting close to what this series is about. Think also of Monty Python and the Holy Grail and a dash of Harry Potter then you would have the formula. (more...)

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Designated commemoration day

October 10: Not-for-Turning Day, International Day of No Underwear

1582 - Pope Gregory XIII implements the Gregorian calendar while not wearing any underwear. He announces that turning is immoral.
1605 - Miguel Cervantes creates Donkey Kong. Unfortunately for him, Niccolo Machiavelli would always beat him for high score.
1807 - Canada defeats The Pirate Nation in the Canadian-Pirate War. Canada turns over a new leaf even though they're not supposed to turn...
1815 - Napoleon I of France begins his exile on St. Helena in the Atlantic Ocean. He forgets to pack any underwear. When it was his turn to attack, he refused, stating his famous catchphrase, "Turning will give you herpes."
1841 - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow writes the poem Excelsior, extolling the virtues of wood shavings.
1921 - Lana Turner is born and immediately gets into trouble.
1936 - The Ace Hardware chain is started by Walter Leatherface who really enjoys demonstrating the newly invented chainsaw.
1954 - The TV dinner is invented but is only available in black and white.
1955 - Jimi Hendrix is spawned from Buddy Holly's guitar and a rum-and-coke while illegally turning on the New Jersey Turnpike.
1962 - Transistors replace tubes in TV dinners.
1964 - The US destroyer USS Turner Joy lives up to her name by turning and starts the Tonkin Gulf Incident.
1975 - USA leads a search for a man named "Charlie" in Vietnam.
1980 - Margaret Thatcher declares that she is not for turning, despite the best attempts of pro-turning lobbyists.
1995 - Underwear outlawed in Paris. Jim Morrison turns in his grave.
2006 - North Korea tests nukes. In response, America builds comsat stations; Iran upgrades zealots; Afghanistan makes turning weapons that have no use.
2015 - George Bush dies from a serious case of turning.
2015 - Al Gore is arrested for the turning of an undisclosed ex-politician.