Babel:Zw

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The Article Which Makes the Present Feature

Today's featured article – Switzerland

Switzerland is a mountainous region created in the early 13th century in order to contain gold and produce chocolate bars. From this point on, the insatiable Swiss desire for idyll building (idyllification) led to the creation of a nation remarkable for its efficient transport networks, orderly villages and synchronised repetitive yodelling.

At the beginning of time, Switzerland was a small moon orbiting the Earth, populated entirely by cows, sheep, and shepherd dogs; it is now thought to be where those creatures came from in the first place and it was known as tobleronistan.

Location of Switzerland, according to CNN. Due to continental drift, the country now lies south of Germany.

After being sent down to Earth, having fallen behind on sky-high rent, Switzerland came to be located south of Germany, bordering France, Italy, Australia and Liechtenstein. Switzerland annexed Czechia in 1990 because the country got too cramped and stuff is cheaper in eastern Europe, although today most Swiss are known to have trillions of dollars in the bank. (more...)

Recently featured:

Previously featured article – St. Pierre and Miquelon

St. Pierre and Michelob (technically, the Territorial Collectivity of Saint Pierre et Michelob; French: Collectivité territoriale de Saint-Pierre-et-Michelob), is an archipelago of small islands off the coast of eastern Canada, the main islands being St. Pierre and Michelob, south of the Canadian province of Newfoundland and Labatt. The islands come within 10 km of Newfoundland. (more...)

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Designated commemoration day

Aw, hell no...

January 10: Reefer Madness Day

370 BCE - Plato almost chokes after inhaling a dandelion, then writes the dialogue Clouds.
75 - John the Baptist makes an unexpected comeback and tours Europe with Buddha. John would stop at every head shop along the way.
1613 - Henry Carver, a resident of London, England, supposedly digs up the granite tablets containing the Ten General Commandments of All Humanity from beneath a cricket pitch near his home. Compies rejoice.
1810 - Napoleon divorces Empress Joséphine, calling her "a total fucking harpie" after she hogs the last spliff in the royal mansion.
1841 - Low on firewood, ropes made from hemp are burned by Mormon pilgrims in Utah. That night, visions from heaven assail them.
1863 - The London Underground is opened in England and promptly closes after a signal failure in Barking.
1968 - The Velvet Underground opens for the Stones in England and promptly closes after a signal failure in Tooting.
1968 - Napalm is dropped on a Vietnamese hemp field, which instigates the largest attack of the munchies known to man.
1979 - Disco is pronounced dead after a tragic cocaine overdose.
1991 - Kool-Aid retires the Kool-Aid Man after he is imprisoned for providing alcohol to a 14-year old girl. (pictured)
2017 - California legalizes weed, with Governor Jerry Brown announcing the voting results with, "Duuuuuuuuuuude... ".