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The Article Which Makes the Present Feature

Today's featured article – Arthur Currie

General Sir Arthur William Currie, GCMB, KCB, KGB, was a Canadian Senior officer during World War I. A prolific commander of the Canadian Expeditionary Force, Currie is among the finest Western front commanders in the war and one of the greatest Canadian officers. However, he is more internationally renowned for his world-class embezzlement; also for his hyper-sensitivity regarding his public image.

Currie was born on December 5, 1875 in the tiny hamlet of Napperton, Ontario. Currie's last name was originally Curry, but, once he got out of "nappers" in 1897, he changed the spelling to avoid being mistaken for either his rival Arthur Curry (the reader knows him as Aquaman) or the popular Indian dish of the same name.

Currie had planned to pursue law or medicine but the convenient death of his father when Currie was 15 made this financially moronic. Currie then pursued teaching; joining the Canada Militia in 1897 was merely a part-time side-hustle. When the poor wages gained from the painful job of educating the devilish spawn of Canada became apparent, Currie stoped dilly-dallying and gave into his destiny as a full-time military man. (more...)

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Previously featured article – Star Trek

Star Trek was a government-mandated Pavlovian conditioning method to keep left-wing radicals and other kooks locked in their homes, staring at an electron gun with glass in front of it. (more...)

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Designated commemoration day

Une-jay 15: Ig-pay Atin-lay Ay-day

1066 - Agnet-may Ars-cay are-ay atented-pay.
1067 - E-tay Ishop-bay of-ay East-ay Anglia-ay invents-ay ocolate-chay.
1219 - Denmark's flag, oldest in history, falls out of the sky. A battle between the Danish and some country of lesser importance then turns in the favor of the Danes, likely because the flag landed point-down on the King of the other country, say intelligent Harvard graduates. Pig Latin professionals will later laugh at the inability to translate this long sentence into Pig Latin.
1777 - Illard-may Illmore-fay eates-cray e-thay Ig-pay Atin-lay Olitical-pay Arty-pay, a-ay one-issue-ay arty-pay evoted-day o-tay aking-may Ig-pay Atin-lay e-thay ational-nay anguage-lay.
1836 - Arkansas becomes a state. Pig latin lobbyists disappointed by impossibility of the name.
1877 - Illard-may Illmore-fay as-hay a-ay entennial-cay elebration-cay. Oth-bay embers-may ow-shay up-ay.
1878 - Illard-may Illmore-fay ives-gay up-ay altogether-ay, and-ay erases-ay everyone's-ay ind-may of is-hay arty-pay.
1905 - Apmobile-cray ounded-fay y-bay Omas-thay Apper-cray in-ay Etroit-day, MI.
1975 - Angelina-ay Olie-jay is-ay orn-bay in-ay Uuk-nay, Eenland-gray. Er-hay Eskimo-ay eritage-hay accounts-ay or-fay er-hay ood-gay ooks-lay.
1992 - Usic-may as-ay e-way ow-knay it-ay, ecides-day o-tay implode-ay. Is-thay is-ay ood-gay ecause-bay eople-pay art-stay istening-lay o-tay etro-ray.
2005 - Pope announces all new announcements will be announced by announcement in Pig Latin.
2006 - Ew-nay Opep-ay lectede-ay.
2026 - Ey-hay, at's-thay oday-tay!
2026 - Uh-thy ope-pey eclairs-day at-they oose-mey as-brey are-ay illegal-ay.(-day)