Babel:Te

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THE WIKI CREED
For I testify unto every man that heareth the words of the prophecy of this book,
If any man shall add unto these things, God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book;
and if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life
—Revelation 22:19-17
NOW GO EDIT SOME STUFF!

Today's featured article – Switzerland

Blueprint for the Matterhorn.JPG

Switzerland is a mountainous region created in the early 13th century in order to contain gold and produce chocolate bars. From this point on, the insatiable Swiss desire for idyll building (idyllification) led to the creation of a nation remarkable for its efficient transport networks, orderly villages and synchronised repetitive yodelling.

At the beginning of time, Switzerland was a small moon orbiting the Earth, populated entirely by cows, sheep, and shepherd dogs; it is now thought to be where those creatures came from in the first place and it was known as tobleronistan.

Location of Switzerland, according to CNN. Due to continental drift, the country now lies south of Germany.

After being sent down to Earth, having fallen behind on sky-high rent, Switzerland came to be located south of Germany, bordering France, Italy, Australia and Liechtenstein. Switzerland annexed Czechia in 1990 because the country got too cramped and stuff is cheaper in eastern Europe, although today most Swiss are known to have trillions of dollars in the bank. (more...)

Previously featured article – St. Pierre and Miquelon

St. Pierre and Miquelon Flag Final.PNG

St. Pierre and Michelob (technically, the Territorial Collectivity of Saint Pierre et Michelob; French: Collectivité territoriale de Saint-Pierre-et-Michelob), is an archipelago of small islands off the coast of eastern Canada, the main islands being St. Pierre and Michelob, south of the Canadian province of Newfoundland and Labatt. The islands come within 10 km of Newfoundland. (more...)

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Books[edit]

Genesis

More of the best of the Bible

Selected Anniversaries

Adolf Hitler doing something naughty. Probably.

January 16: Pencil Envy Day

  • c.1.5 million BCE - Cave people carefully collect and trade for as many different colors of pigment as they can. After mixing up probably fifty separate colors of paint, they mix them all together to get black.
  • 1264 - For the first time in human history, a man is born twice.
  • 1337 - England seethes when they find the French got 24-crayon boxes for Christmas instead of England's normal 16. This would ignite the Hundred Years War, eventually expanding into countries with colored pencils and paint sets.
  • 1356 - Some dude gets all medieval on some other dude.
  • 1922 - Eberhard Faber perfects the pencil but dies tragically the same day when stabbed by someone running with scissors.
  • 1930 - Mickey Mouse loses his license to Steamboat Willie after being caught transporting 11 illegal immigrants up the Timeless River. Walt Disney distraught.
  • 1942 - Odds are, Hitler did something bad on this date in 1942.
  • 1969 - Freddie Blassie begins his search for pencil-necked geeks. Congress doubles its security.
  • 1985 - MacGyver disarms a bomb in the dark using only a very large pencil and two meatballs, only to find it was actually guest star John Holmes.
  • 1987 - Something performed by guys with poofy hair and makeup is the number one song in America.
  • 1990 - You suddenly realize time didn't stop, but know that time stopped. Hammer time!
  • 2000 - Something.com receives one million hits exactly at the same time some stoner dude takes his millionth hit.
  • 2007 - The Dark Portal opens. World of Warcraft fans shit themselves.

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