Babel:Te

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THE WIKI CREED
For I testify unto every man that heareth the words of the prophecy of this book,
If any man shall add unto these things, God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book;
and if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life
—Revelation 22:19-17
NOW GO EDIT SOME STUFF!

Today's featured article – Arthur Currie

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General Sir Arthur William Currie, GCMB, KCB, KGB, was a Canadian Senior officer during World War I. A prolific commander of the Canadian Expeditionary Force, Currie is among the finest Western front commanders in the war and one of the greatest Canadian officers. However, he is more internationally renowned for his world-class embezzlement; also for his hyper-sensitivity regarding his public image.

Currie was born on December 5, 1875 in the tiny hamlet of Napperton, Ontario. Currie's last name was originally Curry, but, once he got out of "nappers" in 1897, he changed the spelling to avoid being mistaken for either his rival Arthur Curry (the reader knows him as Aquaman) or the popular Indian dish of the same name.

Currie had planned to pursue law or medicine but the convenient death of his father when Currie was 15 made this financially moronic. Currie then pursued teaching; joining the Canada Militia in 1897 was merely a part-time side-hustle. When the poor wages gained from the painful job of educating the devilish spawn of Canada became apparent, Currie stoped dilly-dallying and gave into his destiny as a full-time military man. (more...)

Recently featured:

Previously featured article – Star Trek

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Star Trek was a government-mandated Pavlovian conditioning method to keep left-wing radicals and other kooks locked in their homes, staring at an electron gun with glass in front of it. (more...)

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Books[edit]

Genesis

More of the best of the Bible

Selected Anniversaries

This stoat is about to be molested.

May 23: Stoat Molesting Night

  • 818 - The Force is disturbed for the first time.
  • 1783 - Due to a lack of women, American pioneers settle for stoats.
  • 1828 - Soap factory accident creates marshmallows.
  • 1829 - Marshmallow factory accident creates tupperware.
  • 1834 - The Force puts a DO NOT DISTURB sign on her door.
  • 1913 - Igor Stravinsky's The Rite Of Spring is first performed in Paris. It is a huge success and nobody riots, not even a little. He then releases Rite of Spring: The Next Generation and The Rite of Spring III: Hello Kitty's Zombie Awakening on Ice to underwhelming acclaim.
  • 1976 - Syracuse, New York begins the annual Punch an Old Person Festival. It results in 128,693 fatalities.
  • 1985 - The Force is disturbed by its obnoxious roommate at 3 a.m. The Force becomes pissed.
  • 2000 - B.O. level in Otakon reaches intolerable levels, government issues airstrikes.
  • 2001 - TimeWarner merges with Canadian Canned WormsTM.
  • 2002 - Canadian Canned WormsTM TimeWarner buys Microsoft.
  • 2006 - Ask Hal 9000 created.

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