Babel:Te

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THE WIKI CREED
For I testify unto every man that heareth the words of the prophecy of this book,
If any man shall add unto these things, God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book;
and if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life
—Revelation 22:19-17
NOW GO EDIT SOME STUFF!

Today's featured article – Windows XP

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Windows XP, aka NT 5.1.2600, Windows XD or Windows :P is a detestable operating system. It remains Microsoft's "best" system to date, being far superior to subsequent products according to most late adopters.[1] It had an innovative graphical user interface compared to the bloatware known as MS-DOS, while taking up only 40 gigs of disk space. Its file system interacted fully with more dominant operating systems such as OS/2 Warp and Linux, and it featured enhanced mouse support, although still lacking rat support.

If you caught a BSOD, you need to insert a quarter to continue. (In Britain, a pound coin will work, if you push hard.)

Production of XP began in 1998 and was completed in 2000. However, Microsoft realized it did not crash enough, so they worked on making it vulnerable, bug-filled, and overall, an unmitigated pile of blue (or green) screens of death. (more...)

Previously featured article – Switzerland

Blueprint for the Matterhorn.JPG

Switzerland is a mountainous region created in the early 13th century in order to contain gold and produce chocolate bars. From this point on, the insatiable Swiss desire for idyll building (idyllification) led to the creation of a nation remarkable for its efficient transport networks, orderly villages and synchronised repetitive yodelling. (more...)

You can vote for your favorite passages to be featured.

Books[edit]

Genesis

More of the best of the Bible

Selected Anniversaries

Sucks to be you

March 12: Annual Nice Day for an Indecent Exposure Crackdown

  • 1072 - Lady Godiva makes her famous naked ride through the streets of Coventry. She and her naked horse are each fined a shilling each.
  • 1504 - Michelangelo's David is indecently exposed to the naked world. The naked world goes home to cover up.
  • 1867 - Oscar Wilde heavily uses redirects while composing his play Nera; or The Nihilists.
  • 1894 - Coca Cola is first bottled and sold. Its all-cocaine formula would prove to be immensely popular, eclipsing its competitors Creamy Horseshit and Fruity Skunk. Hot sawdust sandwich lunches would never be the same again.
  • 1923 - Sir Reginald Humptington cuts down a tree in Central America, officially kicking off mankind's war against the rainforest.
  • 1947 - Howard Hughes flies his experimental jet aircraft, the Loose Goose, completely made of compressed sand. The plane disintegrates on takeoff with Hughes noting, "I meant to do that."
  • 1962 - Surfers take over much of Southern California, rendering it uninhabitable for decades.
  • 1982 - Hospital administrators announce that disco has slipped into a coma and not expected to survive.
  • 1996 - The Daily Show featuring John Stewart premiers on Comedy Central, proving that Jewish guys can make a living as a comedian.
  • 2010 - Scientists discover a way to float black censor strips in real life over the private parts of zoo animals and pets. US politicians are outraged when they too have black censor strips constantly floating over their private parts despite their constant public exposure.

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  1. ↑ Windows XP remains the overwhelming favorite of late adopters so hidebound as to also refuse to adopt the term "African American," though it seems we're onto something else now.
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