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St. Pierre and Michelob (technically, the Territorial Collectivity of Saint Pierre et Michelob; French: Collectivité territoriale de Saint-Pierre-et-Michelob), is an archipelago of small islands off the coast of eastern Canada, the main islands being St. Pierre and Michelob, south of the Canadian province of Newfoundland and Labatt. The islands come within 10 km of Newfoundland.
Within France, the archipelago has the status of "territorial collectivity" because it sounds more dignified than "neglected islands". Its residents are French citizens; they elect one Deputy to the National Assembly — though, in view of the territory's population (6,008 as of the 2016 census, which was thereafter disbanded), he is only allowed to vote on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. They are also allowed to hold opinions on Senator and President.
St. Pierre and Michelob is all that is left of the once-sprawling North American empire of "New France". (Quebec aspires to the same status, but every time Parisians hear that accent, they are glad they cut them loose.) Acadia broke ties with the territory when it became evident that the islanders were even lazier and more cowardly than the Acadians. It is notable for being France's only remaining possession in North America, and if France washes its hands too, it will not have any notability. (more...)
Previously featured article – Minotaur
The Minotaur was a half-human, half-bull creature in Greek mythology. Rather than a domestic cow, the bovine parent was an auroch, now extinct, as opposed to an auror, which is hoped to be extinct. The tale is probably a manifestation of man’s historic fascination with cow sex. The odd combination of species stands as proof of Creationism, though not by the usual expected deity. (more...)
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| *... that George Washington was an avid heterosexual?
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December 15: Hooker Appreciation Day (Canada, pictured), Small Donga Day (USA Whites only)
- 1200 BCE - "Oh my god! I love those boots! Where did you get them? I have to get a pair!"
- 1485 - The Renaissance man is created when Leonardo Da Vinci gets pissed off at all those damned deadlines set by everyone. Tell your local polymath to calm down, nobody wants another one of these things roaming the earth.
- 1698 - New Björk City is founded by the Swedish chef going "björk björk björk" one too many times, making the local Indians move as far way as possible.
- 1805 - Lewis and Clark buy a hooked rug from a Canadian hooker.
- 1969 - In response to the San Francisco Exhibition Incident of 1969, the United Nations imposes a world-wide ban on suicide by pointless drivel, the only death penalty enforced by the UN.
- 1978 - Massive grease fire at the Grease Hut burns on for hours. The little boy who lives down the street falls into it and is incinerated, while the management feels just awful about it.
- 1993 - Scotland invades Europe: first use of the Haggis Device. Mass confusion follows as the Haggis Device is powered by a kilt-wearin' mofo.
- 1998 - Shia LaBeouf proves that neither good looks nor acting talent is a requirement in movies or TV.
- 2005 - Stan formed, ruled by Stan in the Empire of Stan.
- 2005 - Roughly estimated to be the founding of the NeoIlluminati. Due to temporal manipulation technology, the date could be off as much as 400 eons, 356 years, 11 months, 43 weeks, 3 days, 2 hours, 55 minutes, 34 seconds, and 2 picoseconds.
- 2007 - The end of the world at midnight in New Mexico. Michael Travesser and his cult commit mass suicide, probably, or something. People discover that he had sex with little girls and loads of married women, yet it's all about his sacrifice, isn't it?
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