Babel:Vogon

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Featured Vogon Poem Gashee morphousite Gashee morphousite, thou expungiest quoopisk Fripping lyshus wimbgunts, awhilst moongrovenly kormzibs. Bleem miserable venchit! Bleem forever mestinglish asunder frapt! Gerond withoutitude form into formless bloit, why not then? Moose. More... Recently featured: The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul - The Meaning of Liff - Mostly Harmless - Shada Yesterday's featured poem Oh Freddled Gruntbuggly, Oh freddled gruntbuggly, Thy micturations are to me As plurdled gabbleblotchits On a lurgid bee. Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes And hooptiously drangle me With crinkly bindlewurdles, Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon, See if I don't! More... Vogon Trivia ...That I know where my towel is? ....That you don't? ...That your planet is just about to be torn down in order to make way for a new bypass? ...That I know where my towel is? ....That you don't? ...That your planet is just about to be torn down in order to make way for a new bypass? ...That I know where my towel is? ....That you don't? ...That your planet is just about to be torn down in order to make way for a new bypass?	Constructor Fleet Headlines DOGE calls on Uncyclopedia (pictured) Weezer gets weird at Trump's inauguration Trump tees up new American empire Elon Musk prepares for world government I'm a doctor — You're peeing all wrong US polls are broken ( listen) DNA evidence shows how Christ would vote Lebanon upgrades comms gear Ohio city goes to the dogs NE Patriots go "Judon-frei" Biden drops out, Harris goes large‎‎ Starmer wins British general election Assassin shoots Uncyclopedia in ear Pope Francis revealed to be chat-bot‎ Sunak soaked for General Election announcement On This Day in the Megabrantis cluster... You spent how much on balsa wood condoms? March 31: Condom Appreciation Day 4000 BCE - Babylonians create the first wooden condoms, resulting in much fewer unexpected pregnancies and many, many, many more splinter-related injuries. 1865 - The modern condom is introduced, consisting of sheep stomach lining coated with sulfuric acid. It is quixotically not well received. 1889 - The Eiffel Tower opens to the public. As the steel of the time is notoriously weak, workers rub Viagra into the metal to keep the tower erect. 1917 - The U.S. purchases the Danish West Indies and renames it the Virgin Islands to attract sailors. 1930 - The Motion Picture Production Code ("Hays Code") is created to stop immoral behavior from being shown on the screen, like dirty socks draped on a chair. Dirty sock fetishists would have to sneak across the borders for many years. 1939 - With the invention of latex, the modern modern condom is introduced, single handedly ending the Great Depression. 1958 - Condoms are mentioned on television for the first time in an episode of The Flintstones entitled Put It Back In. 1970 - National No-Condom decade kicks off at Studio 69 in New York City. 1986 - AIDS becomes all the rage. Condom sales increase tenfold. 2009 - The Pope claims that condoms would increase the number of people with AIDS in sub-Saharan Africa, in a similar manner to how exercise is unhealthy and cheeseburgers eat people. 2020 - Robotic condoms are invented. 2030 - Robotic condoms, sick and tired of copulating with female genitals, turn gay.
Today's featured picture The beauty and decisiveness of the Vogon race is apparent with one look at the firm jawline, the blazing eyes, and the oozing smell of stale beer with a hint of burning cat hair Image Credit: Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz Edit Caption - Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images
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Hitchhiker and Towel of the Month A well-known British hitchiker, Braydie Dent has hitched over a dozen stellar systems. His most known phrases consist of: What? and Tea please!. On his spare time he enjoys insanity, cricket, and that famous game that those British enjoy so much...what was it? Oh! Self loathing. Yes. This months Towel is the infamous TowelHax. He has captured a unique perspective of the Galaxy's events with his travels across the milky way. Sass that froopy towel. He knows where his towel he is. Vote for Hiker of the month | Vote for Detached Arm of the Month | Vote for the Triple Breasted Whore of the Month | Past Winners

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