Babel:Vogon

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Featured Vogon Poem Gashee morphousite Gashee morphousite, thou expungiest quoopisk Fripping lyshus wimbgunts, awhilst moongrovenly kormzibs. Bleem miserable venchit! Bleem forever mestinglish asunder frapt! Gerond withoutitude form into formless bloit, why not then? Moose. More... Recently featured: The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul - The Meaning of Liff - Mostly Harmless - Shada Yesterday's featured poem Oh Freddled Gruntbuggly, Oh freddled gruntbuggly, Thy micturations are to me As plurdled gabbleblotchits On a lurgid bee. Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes And hooptiously drangle me With crinkly bindlewurdles, Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon, See if I don't! More... Vogon Trivia ...That there are ten thousand monkeys outside the door who wish to discuss their play script for Hamlet? ...That your house is just about to be torn down in order to make way for a new bypass? ...That there are ten thousand monkeys outside the door who wish to discuss their play script for Hamlet? ...That your house is just about to be torn down in order to make way for a new bypass? ...That there are ten thousand monkeys outside the door who wish to discuss their play script for Hamlet? ...That your house is just about to be torn down in order to make way for a new bypass?	Constructor Fleet Headlines Uncyclopedia implements funny ban Miley Cyrus lends her wrecking ball to Donald Trump Prince Andrew to go into permanent exile (pictured) John Bolton is indicted Florida to use Cracker Barrels as immigration checkpoints Flying Dildos dominate the WNBA Epstein list emerges Miss England to Miss World: I'm out Qatar gifts Trump an airplane Popeye deported for gang-related tattoos DOGE calls on Uncyclopedia Weezer gets weird at Trump's inauguration Trump tees up new American empire Elon Musk prepares for world government I'm a doctor — You're peeing all wrong On This Day in the Megabrantis cluster... December 14: World Cliché Day Long Long Ago - Some French guy misplaces his patent for creating the English language. 1735 - Pie is discovered before π. 1830 - It is a dark and stormy night. 1911 - Welsh explorer Roald Dahl and his team become the first people to reach the Giant Peach. 1929 - Hitler realizes he has very little time to finish his Christmas shopping, and subsequently freaks out while in line at WalMart. Chaos ensues. 1945 - The Nazis prove that every cloud has a silver lining, especially if you hate Jews. 1978 - Chuck Norris sweeps his girlfriend off her feet. With a roundhouse kick. In a roundhouse. Just for kicks. 1991 - Scientists first start working on Packaged Bread Without Crust™. For the next 10 years they will go to countless parties with other scientists and feel like they are working to find the cure for cancer. 2000 - George W. Bush receives his first gay blowjob. In return for the favor, George W. Bush and his government maintain a very friendly line towards homosexuals. 2001 - 10 years in the making, Packaged Bread Without Crust™ is finally introduced as a prototype to the Bimbo company. 2004 The Kitten army begins to prepare for their mass masturbation strike for 25 December during the Human vs. Kitten War. The strike kills 250,000+ humans. 2011 - It's the end of the world as we know it (and I feel fine). Today - The first day of the rest of your life.
Today's featured picture The beauty and decisiveness of the Vogon race is apparent with one look at the firm jawline, the blazing eyes, and the oozing smell of stale beer with a hint of burning cat hair Image Credit: Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz Edit Caption - Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images
edit Recent Poems Alexander the Not So Great | Dubnium (pictured) | Hebe | Carbon tetrachloride | Tetrachloroethylene | Northrop B-2 Spirit | Blue Fairies | People's Action Party (Singapore) | Woof | John Mahama | Vivek Ramaswamy | Norse Korea | Michael VI | Factorial | Bunsen burner | Queue | Odysseus | Mutually exclusive events‎ | Calcium | Kristi Noem | Anti-Zionism | Kevin McCarthy | Mike Johnson | House of Bourbon | Akaa, Finland | Nikki Haley | Menelaus | Ajax | Air Canada | Agamemnon | Great Schism More recent poems | Most wanted poems | Requested poems | Add to stubs | Lonely poems | Poetry Review | Try writing a poem about... | Stuck stanzas
Hitchhiker and Towel of the Month A well-known British hitchiker, Braydie Dent has hitched over a dozen stellar systems. His most known phrases consist of: What? and Tea please!. On his spare time he enjoys insanity, cricket, and that famous game that those British enjoy so much...what was it? Oh! Self loathing. Yes. This months Towel is the infamous TowelHax. He has captured a unique perspective of the Galaxy's events with his travels across the milky way. Sass that froopy towel. He knows where his towel he is. Vote for Hiker of the month | Vote for Detached Arm of the Month | Vote for the Triple Breasted Whore of the Month | Past Winners

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