Babel:Vogon

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Featured Vogon Poem Gashee morphousite Gashee morphousite, thou expungiest quoopisk Fripping lyshus wimbgunts, awhilst moongrovenly kormzibs. Bleem miserable venchit! Bleem forever mestinglish asunder frapt! Gerond withoutitude form into formless bloit, why not then? Moose. More... Recently featured: The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul - The Meaning of Liff - Mostly Harmless - Shada Yesterday's featured poem Oh Freddled Gruntbuggly, Oh freddled gruntbuggly, Thy micturations are to me As plurdled gabbleblotchits On a lurgid bee. Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes And hooptiously drangle me With crinkly bindlewurdles, Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon, See if I don't! More... Vogon Trivia ...That Zaphod Beeblebrox has more heads than Presidency nominations? ...That all your bypasses are belong to us? ...That Zaphod Beeblebrox has more heads than Presidency nominations? ...That all your bypasses are belong to us? ...That Zaphod Beeblebrox has more heads than Presidency nominations? ...That all your bypasses are belong to us?	Constructor Fleet Headlines Trump breaks the Mustache Mafia (pictured) Hegseth orders drone attack on Santa Claus Trump renames Christmas Uncyclopedia implements funny ban Miley Cyrus lends her wrecking ball to Donald Trump Prince Andrew to go into permanent exile John Bolton is indicted Florida to use Cracker Barrels as immigration checkpoints Flying Dildos dominate the WNBA Epstein list emerges Miss England to Miss World: I'm out Qatar gifts Trump an airplane Popeye deported for gang-related tattoos DOGE calls on Uncyclopedia Weezer gets weird at Trump's inauguration On This Day in the Megabrantis cluster... February 3: Go Fuck a Groundhog Day c.1200 BCE - Groundhogs are worshipped by the Mayans, whereas they are just your chubby little run-of-the-mill pyramid-building rodents from outer space with godlike powers. 532 BCE - Groundhogs take in laundry to make ends meet, beginning their own Iron Age. 235 - The Moon is invented by rogue cave dwelling ducks from South Africa. 947 - Doughnut-worshipping groundhogs change their name to woodchucks to avoid religious persecution. 1194 - Saladin I gets it on with Pandhragati Phil, a local groundhog, causing it to snow in Arabia. 1806 - The chickens come home to Roost. Residents of Roost get tired of eating eggs very quickly. 1903 - Inspired by hearing a story about how Theodore Roosevelt refuses to shoot a bear on the grounds that it was injured and elderly, and besides, "it's no fun if they can't run fast enough to almost make it before I blow their brains out", Morris Michtom and his wife Rose introduce the first teddy bear in America. It would later attempt to assassinate Roosevelt. 1942 - Singapore falls. Denmark trips, but says he's all right and gets up again. 1992 - Prefix "e-" is invented. Kitten death rate triples. 1995 - Bill Murray repeats himself while learning about Uber and Lyft drivers. 1996 - Bill Murray humps Andie MacDowell again. 2012 - SOPA passes, internet ends.
Today's featured picture The beauty and decisiveness of the Vogon race is apparent with one look at the firm jawline, the blazing eyes, and the oozing smell of stale beer with a hint of burning cat hair Image Credit: Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz Edit Caption - Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images
edit Recent Poems Alexander the Not So Great (pictured) | Dubnium | Hebe | Carbon tetrachloride | Tetrachloroethylene | Northrop B-2 Spirit | Blue Fairies | People's Action Party (Singapore) | Woof | John Mahama | Vivek Ramaswamy | Norse Korea | Michael VI | Factorial | Bunsen burner | Queue | Odysseus | Mutually exclusive events‎ | Calcium | Kristi Noem | Anti-Zionism | Kevin McCarthy | Mike Johnson | House of Bourbon | Akaa, Finland | Nikki Haley | Menelaus | Ajax | Air Canada | Agamemnon | Great Schism More recent poems | Most wanted poems | Requested poems | Add to stubs | Lonely poems | Poetry Review | Try writing a poem about... | Stuck stanzas
Hitchhiker and Towel of the Month A well-known British hitchiker, Braydie Dent has hitched over a dozen stellar systems. His most known phrases consist of: What? and Tea please!. On his spare time he enjoys insanity, cricket, and that famous game that those British enjoy so much...what was it? Oh! Self loathing. Yes. This months Towel is the infamous TowelHax. He has captured a unique perspective of the Galaxy's events with his travels across the milky way. Sass that froopy towel. He knows where his towel he is. Vote for Hiker of the month | Vote for Detached Arm of the Month | Vote for the Triple Breasted Whore of the Month | Past Winners

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