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Featured Vogon Poem Gashee morphousite Gashee morphousite, thou expungiest quoopisk Fripping lyshus wimbgunts, awhilst moongrovenly kormzibs. Bleem miserable venchit! Bleem forever mestinglish asunder frapt! Gerond withoutitude form into formless bloit, why not then? Moose. More... Recently featured: The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul - The Meaning of Liff - Mostly Harmless - Shada Yesterday's featured poem Oh Freddled Gruntbuggly, Oh freddled gruntbuggly, Thy micturations are to me As plurdled gabbleblotchits On a lurgid bee. Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes And hooptiously drangle me With crinkly bindlewurdles, Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon, See if I don't! More... Vogon Trivia ...That mattresses can be harvested all the year long except during their mating season? ...That you should share and enjoy? ...That mattresses can be harvested all the year long except during their mating season? ...That you should share and enjoy? ...That mattresses can be harvested all the year long except during their mating season? ...That you should share and enjoy?	Constructor Fleet Headlines Obama photographed with aliens (pictured) Trump breaks the Mustache Mafia Hegseth orders drone attack on Santa Claus Trump renames Christmas Uncyclopedia implements funny ban Miley Cyrus lends her wrecking ball to Donald Trump Prince Andrew to go into permanent exile John Bolton is indicted Florida to use Cracker Barrels as immigration checkpoints Flying Dildos dominate the WNBA Epstein list emerges Miss England to Miss World: I'm out Qatar gifts Trump an airplane Popeye deported for gang-related tattoos DOGE calls on Uncyclopedia On This Day in the Megabrantis cluster... February 26: Famous Last Words Day 2008 BCE - "Phdugy'dufc eibgs'ghib kuikhigihdmvgh's" – Cthulhu, again. 480 BCE - "This is an arrow!" – Spartan guy 666 - "Pity me." – Satan, on Mr.T 777 - "AAA" – AAA 1566 - "Tomorrow, I shall no longer be here." – Nostradamus, his only prediction that comes true. 1900 - "My wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. One or the other of us has to go." – Oscar Wilde 1900 - "As much as I hate him, Oscar is right. I would not want to change a thing." – Mark Twain 1920 - "It can't end like this. Tell them I said something." – Pancho Villa is hit by history's most unfortunately-timed case of writer's block. 1939 - "This is absurd ! This is absurd !" – Sigmund Freud, after reading Waiting for Godot 1,111 times. 1939 - "No! Mine are more absurd than this crap." – Albert Camus , in reply to Sigmund (MotherF*cker) Freud saying that his works are more absurd. 1939 - "Who care about absurdity , Hell are others." – Jean Paul Sartre, in reply to Albert Camus. 1939 - "I am dying. Please... bring me a toothpick." – Fred, after reading Waiting for Godot 99,999 times. 1939 - "See! This one is more absurd that you two !!" – Jean Paul Sartre , awakening from his grave to get in the last word. 1945 - "Peace out, bitches!" – Jozef Goebbels comin' at you live, also from A to the D to the Hizzle's concrete crib, yo. 1967 - "I know you've come to kill me. Shoot, you are only going to kill a man." – Che Guevara, where 'only going to kill a man' means that he'll be revived as zombie and sticker-tags. 1969 - "This is one small step for HOLY...!" – Neil Armstrong 1992 - "..." – John Cage, who confuses the angel of death who thinks this is some kind of extreme performance art. 2000 - "Hold my beer. WATCH THIS... " – Unknown, but attributed to hundreds of people appearing on Jackass. 2006 - "And this rope is of such shitty quality!" – Saddamn, at the gallows, complaining his ass into his grave. 2175 - "I'm dying... so that I'm not going to live anymore." – Captain Obvious 2345 - "What's this button do???" – George W. Bush the 7th 2456 - "WarniT!" – Jesus Goffer The End of Everything - "Sorry for the inconvenience." – God
Today's featured picture The beauty and decisiveness of the Vogon race is apparent with one look at the firm jawline, the blazing eyes, and the oozing smell of stale beer with a hint of burning cat hair Image Credit: Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz Edit Caption - Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images
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Hitchhiker and Towel of the Month A well-known British hitchiker, Braydie Dent has hitched over a dozen stellar systems. His most known phrases consist of: What? and Tea please!. On his spare time he enjoys insanity, cricket, and that famous game that those British enjoy so much...what was it? Oh! Self loathing. Yes. This months Towel is the infamous TowelHax. He has captured a unique perspective of the Galaxy's events with his travels across the milky way. Sass that froopy towel. He knows where his towel he is. Vote for Hiker of the month | Vote for Detached Arm of the Month | Vote for the Triple Breasted Whore of the Month | Past Winners

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