Babel:Vogon

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Featured Vogon Poem Gashee morphousite Gashee morphousite, thou expungiest quoopisk Fripping lyshus wimbgunts, awhilst moongrovenly kormzibs. Bleem miserable venchit! Bleem forever mestinglish asunder frapt! Gerond withoutitude form into formless bloit, why not then? Moose. More... Recently featured: The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul - The Meaning of Liff - Mostly Harmless - Shada Yesterday's featured poem Oh Freddled Gruntbuggly, Oh freddled gruntbuggly, Thy micturations are to me As plurdled gabbleblotchits On a lurgid bee. Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes And hooptiously drangle me With crinkly bindlewurdles, Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon, See if I don't! More... Vogon Trivia ...That there are ten thousand monkeys outside the door who wish to discuss their play script for Hamlet? ...That your house is just about to be torn down in order to make way for a new bypass? ...That there are ten thousand monkeys outside the door who wish to discuss their play script for Hamlet? ...That your house is just about to be torn down in order to make way for a new bypass? ...That there are ten thousand monkeys outside the door who wish to discuss their play script for Hamlet? ...That your house is just about to be torn down in order to make way for a new bypass?	Constructor Fleet Headlines Trump breaks the Mustache Mafia (pictured) Hegseth orders drone attack on Santa Claus Trump renames Christmas Uncyclopedia implements funny ban Miley Cyrus lends her wrecking ball to Donald Trump Prince Andrew to go into permanent exile John Bolton is indicted Florida to use Cracker Barrels as immigration checkpoints Flying Dildos dominate the WNBA Epstein list emerges Miss England to Miss World: I'm out Qatar gifts Trump an airplane Popeye deported for gang-related tattoos DOGE calls on Uncyclopedia Weezer gets weird at Trump's inauguration On This Day in the Megabrantis cluster... February 14: International Suck Day 32 CE - Jesus Christ contracts bad case of crabs from Mary Magdalene. 35 CE - New cure for crabs invented that does not involve crucifixion. 269 - St. Valentinus is castrated, horsewhipped and disembowelled. 1500 years later, this day is celebrated through romance. 1307 - William Tell uses cow hearts for targets and gives them with an arrow through each to various women in Gstaad, Switzerland. They flee in terror and he takes their chocolate. 1852 - Ash Ketchum says "I choo choo choose you" to Nurse Joy shortly before his death by being hit by a train. 1930 - Elm Farm Ollie becomes the first cow to fly in a fixed-wing aircraft and also the first cow to be milked in an aircraft. She would later barnstorm in her self-built plane and hand out ice cream to children as flying at high altitudes is quite cold. 1994 - Canada successfully builds a space shuttle capable of flying back to Earth. 2003 - One of the people who is woefully alone proposes an alternative holiday, entitled Go Out With a Loser Who Has Never Had a Date Day. However, no girl will still talk to him. 2004 - Not willing to give up, the guy who made the holiday in 2003 decides to make Trek-mance Connection. Now, even nerdy girls still won't talk to him. 2005 - Lonely guy starts an Emo band. Bandmates ask him not to name the band. Girls still won't talk to him. 2009 - St. Valentinus is reborn and executed for the second time for molesting small farm animals. 2010 - St. Valentinus is reincarnated as a charismatic frog and gets away with years of outrageous self-abuse.
Today's featured picture The beauty and decisiveness of the Vogon race is apparent with one look at the firm jawline, the blazing eyes, and the oozing smell of stale beer with a hint of burning cat hair Image Credit: Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz Edit Caption - Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images
edit Recent Poems Alexander the Not So Great (pictured) | Dubnium | Hebe | Carbon tetrachloride | Tetrachloroethylene | Northrop B-2 Spirit | Blue Fairies | People's Action Party (Singapore) | Woof | John Mahama | Vivek Ramaswamy | Norse Korea | Michael VI | Factorial | Bunsen burner | Queue | Odysseus | Mutually exclusive events‎ | Calcium | Kristi Noem | Anti-Zionism | Kevin McCarthy | Mike Johnson | House of Bourbon | Akaa, Finland | Nikki Haley | Menelaus | Ajax | Air Canada | Agamemnon | Great Schism More recent poems | Most wanted poems | Requested poems | Add to stubs | Lonely poems | Poetry Review | Try writing a poem about... | Stuck stanzas
Hitchhiker and Towel of the Month A well-known British hitchiker, Braydie Dent has hitched over a dozen stellar systems. His most known phrases consist of: What? and Tea please!. On his spare time he enjoys insanity, cricket, and that famous game that those British enjoy so much...what was it? Oh! Self loathing. Yes. This months Towel is the infamous TowelHax. He has captured a unique perspective of the Galaxy's events with his travels across the milky way. Sass that froopy towel. He knows where his towel he is. Vote for Hiker of the month | Vote for Detached Arm of the Month | Vote for the Triple Breasted Whore of the Month | Past Winners

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