Babel:Vogon

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Featured Vogon Poem Gashee morphousite Gashee morphousite, thou expungiest quoopisk Fripping lyshus wimbgunts, awhilst moongrovenly kormzibs. Bleem miserable venchit! Bleem forever mestinglish asunder frapt! Gerond withoutitude form into formless bloit, why not then? Moose. More... Recently featured: The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul - The Meaning of Liff - Mostly Harmless - Shada Yesterday's featured poem Oh Freddled Gruntbuggly, Oh freddled gruntbuggly, Thy micturations are to me As plurdled gabbleblotchits On a lurgid bee. Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes And hooptiously drangle me With crinkly bindlewurdles, Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon, See if I don't! More... Vogon Trivia ...That I know where my towel is? ....That you don't? ...That the secret of a superb sandwich is ample wrist movements? ...That I know where my towel is? ....That you don't? ...That the secret of a superb sandwich is ample wrist movements? ...That I know where my towel is? ....That you don't? ...That the secret of a superb sandwich is ample wrist movements?	Constructor Fleet Headlines Hegseth orders drone attack on Santa Claus (pictured) Trump renames Christmas Uncyclopedia implements funny ban Miley Cyrus lends her wrecking ball to Donald Trump Prince Andrew to go into permanent exile John Bolton is indicted Florida to use Cracker Barrels as immigration checkpoints Flying Dildos dominate the WNBA Epstein list emerges Miss England to Miss World: I'm out Qatar gifts Trump an airplane Popeye deported for gang-related tattoos DOGE calls on Uncyclopedia Weezer gets weird at Trump's inauguration Trump tees up new American empire On This Day in the Megabrantis cluster... January 8: National Discrimination Day 450,000,000,000 BCE - "Earfh" is created, but is quickly destroyed and replaced with the current Earth as simply correcting the typo on the planning form requires two months notice. Dinosaurs die as a result. 33 - Jesus begins his steady decline. 41 - Roman emperor Caligula is found not to know shit from shinola and takes one for the team. 732 - The Dark Ages would suffer from not being allowed to live or work with other ages. 1066 - English realty agents chase off Nordic immigrants at Stamford Bridge but fail to prevent French immigrants from taking beachfront property further south. 1815 - Andrew Jackson forgets that the war is over and utterly destroys the British Army. Fortunately, America forgives him and treats him as a predecessor to Rambo. 1942 - Henry Ford declares his allegiance to Adolf Hitler's dictatorship, who in turn makes Ford improve customer service. 1967 - Martin Luther King Jr. dies of a tragic M&M overdose. 2009 - Kellogg's continues to conquer the cereal market with Smack after finally dropping the honey flavouring and just selling it straight up. (pictured) 2010 - The popular children's story that "an apple a day keeps the doctor away" is discovered to be false; research published in the Daily Mail shows it instead speeds up genital wart formation and werewolfism.
Today's featured picture The beauty and decisiveness of the Vogon race is apparent with one look at the firm jawline, the blazing eyes, and the oozing smell of stale beer with a hint of burning cat hair Image Credit: Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz Edit Caption - Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images
edit Recent Poems Alexander the Not So Great (pictured) | Dubnium | Hebe | Carbon tetrachloride | Tetrachloroethylene | Northrop B-2 Spirit | Blue Fairies | People's Action Party (Singapore) | Woof | John Mahama | Vivek Ramaswamy | Norse Korea | Michael VI | Factorial | Bunsen burner | Queue | Odysseus | Mutually exclusive events‎ | Calcium | Kristi Noem | Anti-Zionism | Kevin McCarthy | Mike Johnson | House of Bourbon | Akaa, Finland | Nikki Haley | Menelaus | Ajax | Air Canada | Agamemnon | Great Schism More recent poems | Most wanted poems | Requested poems | Add to stubs | Lonely poems | Poetry Review | Try writing a poem about... | Stuck stanzas
Hitchhiker and Towel of the Month A well-known British hitchiker, Braydie Dent has hitched over a dozen stellar systems. His most known phrases consist of: What? and Tea please!. On his spare time he enjoys insanity, cricket, and that famous game that those British enjoy so much...what was it? Oh! Self loathing. Yes. This months Towel is the infamous TowelHax. He has captured a unique perspective of the Galaxy's events with his travels across the milky way. Sass that froopy towel. He knows where his towel he is. Vote for Hiker of the month | Vote for Detached Arm of the Month | Vote for the Triple Breasted Whore of the Month | Past Winners

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