Dr. Eggman

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A master of both coolness and comedy, Eggbotnikman is known for his dignified-yet-wacky body language, militaristic attire, and seductive mustache that would turn Tom Selleck green with envy.

“I am the Eggman, they are the Eggmen, I am the walrus. Goo goo g'joob.”

~ John Lennon on Dr. Eggman

Dr. Ivo "Eggman" Robotnik (Japanese: Dokutā Pingas) is the main antagonist of Sega's Sonic the Hedgehog video game series. He is a magnificent fat bastard known for his evil plans of world domination, which are somehow always thwarted by a blue overgrown rat in skater shoes.

Eggman has appeared in almost every Sonic game since the very first one, even the lesser ones like Sonic '06, Shadow the Hedgehog, Sonic Boom, Sonic's Schoolhouse, and Sonic's Roblox Murder Mystery. He is also a prominent character in other Sonic media and merchandise, including Eggman-themed comics, novels, cartoons, anime, drinking mugs, panties, flamethrowers, and toilet paper.

Characteristics[edit]

Eggman is an obese technological genius and former Soviet engineer obsessed with conquering ovaloid masses with his mechanical menagerie of cute animals-tuned-robotic slaves. When the slowpoke sissies in the Soviet Army told him his low-cost monkey missile guidance system and doggy drones went to far, the Doctor took his tub of talent to more like-minded technocrats. His attempts at world domination have lead to unprecedented job growth in the post-apocalypse's STEM sector, and have brought animal unemployment to an all-time low. Despite being a mad scientist, Eggman lacks common sense, in that he creates machines that are shoddily-built and reveal their weaknesses rather easily. He has a particular fondness for robots that end up attacking themselves, which may be a sign that he doesn't actually want to rule the world and just enjoys messing with people for fun.

Although Eggman has been defeated by Sonic and his seventy disciples countless times,[1] he somehow always manages to jump from base to base and avoid the fate of Saddam Hussein (because he can apparently run faster than Sonic). He continues to return and wreak havoc on Mobius Freedom Earth Sonic's world, though increasingly only part-time, as to give the sinister spotlight to "ancient awakened evils" that look cooler than him (i.e. Chaos, Solaris, Dark Gaia, the Time Eater). Without a full-time job, the income to fund his plans is generated through his various television/radio programs such as Cooking with 12w40 Oil and Prrromotion Radio. In recent years, in order to cut costs, Eggman has stopped using animals as his robots' power sources, instead relying on the strength of his mustache alone. Or wind power. Or solar power. Or whatever junk happened to fall out of the sky last week.

In his spare time, Eggman enjoys training for and entering Competitive Eating competitions, in which he has found another rival he routinely comes second to: Takeru Kobayashi.

Biography[edit]

Early life[edit]

Robotnik was born to a single mother with an abusive disposition and a hair-on-lip disorder. He was placed in a nursery under a nanny's care, only to overthrow the nanny in a military coup d'état. As a child, he ate four dozen eggs every morning, which resulted in him being roughly the size of a barge.

As a young adult, he attended the University of Voracious Villainy to gain his degree in Gloating Over Clearly-Helpless Protagonists, but was constantly outshone by his greatest rival, Megatron. This inspired him to complete his degree by building millions of robots that were so pathetically weak that even a rodent would be able to destroy them, which has clearly backfired as now he seems incapable of building anything that can't be destroyed by hedgehogs.

Book of Genesis[edit]

Dr. Robotnik in simpler times.

“Snooping as usual I see!”

~ Dr. Robotnik on Pingas

In Sonic the Hedgehog (1991), Robotnik attempts to take over the tranquil South Island by capturing cute little animals and turning them into ravenously stupid robots, which is probably where the computer in The Matrix got the idea to use humans as batteries. He also aims to find the Chaos Emeralds, mystical gemstones hidden on the island that turn your wishes into power, to help him realize his dreams of conquering the world and winning the Moustache Olympics. However, an ultra-fast furry blue hedgehog named Sonic, who wasn't happy over having his vacation ruined, comes in to spoil the doctor's plans.

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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Dr. Eggman.

In Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (1992), following his embarrassing defeat at the hands of Sonic, Robotnik is "inspired" to create his own version of the Death Star called the Death Egg. He tries to take over the world once more, but Sonic and his new sidekick Tails whoop Robotnik's massive rolls of fat again. Sonic then becomes Super Sonic and totally wastes the Death Egg.

In the campy Saturday morning cartoon Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog (1993), Robotnik lives in a Seussian fortress on top of a dangerously steep hill; one that was very easy to spot despite constant relocating, as it was decorated with a large golden statue of himself. He resides with his slapstick robot assistants Scratch, Grounder, and Coconuts, who always manage to screw up his plans, if Sonic and Tails hadn't done so already.

In the alternate-universe OC furry melodrama Sonic SAtAM (1993), Robotnik is the dictator of Mobius who has a nephew named Snively and whose first name is "Julian" instead of "Ivo". In this universe he has already taken over the world, and is gritty and threatening unlike his other clownish incarnations. He battles Sonic and his gang of guerrilla furries known as the Freedom Fighters. In the final episode, he is banished into The Void and would've been replaced by a wizard named Ixis Nagus for season three, but the show got cancelled for more Power Rangers reruns before this could happen.

In Sonic the Hedgehog 3 (1994), the Death Egg crash-lands on a floating island called Floating Island. There, Robotnik meets the island's guardian, Knuckles the Echidna, and tricks him into thinking Sonic and Tails are coming to steal the Master Emerald and he is here to help. Knuckles, being the dupe he is, goes around the island to try and hider Sonic's progress by setting off traps. Robotnik is able to launch the Death Egg, but it fails to get into orbit before that meddling hedgehog sends it crashing back down.

In Sonic & Knuckles (1994), Robotnik breaks in to Hidden Palace to steal the Master Emerald, which will be used to recharge the Death Egg. Knuckles uncovers Robotnik's thievery and cries out to him "I thought we had something special!", to which Robotnik responds by electrocuting Knuckles. As expected, Sonic and Tails whoop the stuffing out of the not-so-good doctor, blow up the Death Egg, and return the Master Emerald to Knuckles. After this crippling defeat, Robotnik voluntarily checked himself into a clinic for eating disorders. The therapy was a success, resulting in him losing about 200lbs in weight just in time for the next generation in console technology.

Book of Dreamcast[edit]

Robotnik made his jump to 3D in Sonic Adventure (1999), his mustache now being viewable in all its polygonal glory. The Doctor learns of Chaos, a liquid Dragon Ball Z monster trapped in the Master Emerald, and shatters the emerald to free the beast; with Chaos released, Robotnik could now subcontract half his boss fights. His goal is to obtain the Chaos Emeralds and feed them to Chaos so that it transforms into its most powerful form, Perfect Chaos; Chaos will then use its destructive powers to destroy the city of Station Square, so Robotnik can build his own mustachioed theme park on its ruins. However, upon gaining all of the emeralds, Chaos betrays and fires his laser on his master, sending the mad doctor flying sky high. Of note, Sonic and friends began calling the Doctor "Eggman" in this game, as an insulting nickname referring to his round shape; apparently Robotnik decided to reclaim and own this insult by calling himself "Eggman" in every game after this.

In Sonic Adventure 2 (2001), Eggman teams up with Shadow the Hedgehog, the angsty "Ultimate Life Form" created by Eggman's grandfather Prof. Gerald Robotnik; and Rouge the Bat, a heavily-endowed treasure hunter who is secretly an undercover government agent, to take over the world using the Eclipse Cannon on the long-abandoned Space Colony ARK.[2] Eggman's proudest moment in the game occurs when he nearly kills Sonic (predictably, our hero survives) and nabs the last of the seven Chaos Emeralds needed to power the cannon; however, upon inserting the emerald in the cannon, a failsafe is activated sending the colony on a collision course with Earth, implemented by Prof. Gerald as retaliation for gubment pigs killing his granddaughter during their raid on the ARK. With no means of escaping the colony, Eggman reluctantly teams up with Sonic and pals to save himself from the ghost of his loony grandpa.

Book of 6Gen[edit]

“You know what they say, the more the merrier!
You know what they say, the more the merrier!
You know what they say, the more the merrier!
You know what they say, the more the merrier!
You know what they say, the more the merrier!
You know what they say, the more the merrier!”

~ Dr. Eggman on the Egg Breaker

In Sonic Heroes (2003), Eggman launches an Egg Fleet of battleships, which he plans to use to take over the world in three days (good luck with that). Unfortunately, before he can even set his plans in motion, he is betrayed by his own creation (starting to notice a pattern here?), Metal Sonic, who locks Eggman up, takes control of his fleet, and shapeshifts into the doctor. Eggman uses a walkie talkie to contact the Team Chaotix detective agency, and offers them lots and lots of money if they free him. Once Eggman is freed however, it is too late to stop the metallic menace, and Metal Sonic transforms into a rehash of Chaos. After Sonic and friends defeat Metal with the Real Superpower of Teamwork™, Eggman is chased away by the Chaotix when he tries to sneak out of paying them.

In Shadow the Hedgehog (2005), Eggman tries to gather the Chaos Emeralds in the midst of a totally random alien invasion. Eggman makes up for any display of previous competence in Sonic Adventure 2 and shows his true colors as a simple-minded opportunist who builds his jankiest bases and robots yet. These include the Egg Dealer, a giant robotic slot machine that can power up his enemies (so that Shads can kill him all the faster); the Egg Breaker, which can be beaten in seven seconds flat; the Egg Pawns, robots with huge neon arrows saying "Weak Spot Here" in flashing lights; Cryptic Castle, a castle on Ancient Indian Burial Grounds; the Lava Shelter, a volcanic base that can be filled up with lava; and a ring-themed theme-park that secretly funds his schemes called Eggmanland. Tails was somehow having difficulty proving to the government that this theme park is run by Eggman despite the staff consisting entirely of fat robots, which is all kinds of existential. The Doctor also built a bunch of Shadow Androids, apparently because Shadow wasn't pissed off enough at him already. It hardly comes as a surprise that Eggman gets killed about five million times in this game.

At one point, Eggman manages to capture Amy, Cream, and Cheese in order to lure Shadow to his haunted castle base, and Shadow turned up right on cue with gun loaded, safety off, and wrists so numb. When the brooding, amnesiac Shadow interrogates the doctor for information regarding his past, he is met with taunts from Eggman, who claims that Shadow is one of his androids. In some of the game's possible endings, Shadow accepts being an android and seemingly kills Eggman (seriously). However, in the true ending during Shadow's fight with the alien menace, Eggman admits that he was being a lying bastard, and Shadow really is a flesh-and-blood hedgehog after all. This was meant to motivate Shadow, but none of this made him feel any better about all the other stupid things Eggman had been saying throughout the whole game.

Book of 7Gen[edit]

OH GOD GET THAT THING AWAY FROM ME

In Sonic the Hedgehog (2006), Eggman kidnaps Princess Elise of Venice, Italy Soleanna, intent on using the Flames of Disaster contained within her to control time. Throughout the game, he appears to have more of a sinister "edge" than in previous 3D Sonic games, attempting to re-establish his reputation as a goofy-but-still-badass villain. Still, as with every single other 3D Sonic game up to this point, he is forced to assist the heroes during the last act, when the space-time continuum crumbles and only Elise kissing Sonic can save the day. In this game, Eggman was given a hideous "realistic" redesign, complete with a bulging black spandex crotch and gold nipples on his jacket; this design has not been used since, as it mentally scarred thousands of players.

In Sonic Unleashed (2008), Eggman traps Super Sonic and harnesses his energy to power a laser cannon, which fires into the Earth and shatters it into pieces, freeing the hideous beast contained within: Dark Gaia. Draining Sonic's energy also has the side-effect of turning him into a werewolf with stretchy arms for some reason, confirming the theory that some days, being a hero must really suck. As usual, Eggman's failure to just frontfire Sonic when he's got the chance backfires horribly on him, like every other invention he ever made. Still, at least Eggman regrows a pair in this game and remains a semi-sinister villain 'till the end, rather than just joining Sonic's team when all else fails. Of course, the doctor still suffers the usual cartoony defeat, when he bosses Dark Gaia around and gets shot into the stratosphere as a result.

In Sonic Colors (2009), Baldy McNosenhair Eggman, still feeling insecure about his status as Sonic's Public Enemy #1, sets up a seemingly-innocent theme park as a front for enslaving an alien race known as Wisps and draining their energy, then building some sort of Wisp-based poultry farm with the plan of taking over the world with his new fast-food chain, McWispy's. This energy is used to power a mind-control cannon, which Eggman plans on using to brainwash everybody into eating his brightly-colored Wisp Burgers. It's up to Sonic, the only person who can still move above a jog, to stop him from conquering the universe. For the first time since Sonic & Knuckles, Eggman is also the final boss; after Sonic defeats him, his theme park collapses into a black hole and he is sucked inside, yet somehow manages to survive.

In Sonic Generations (2011), Eggman finally succeeds in his goal of controlling time by enslaving a being known as the Time Eater, and uses its time powers to reverse all of his past defeats at the hands of Sonic. By using the Time Eater, however, he causes rifts in time to open, bringing Sonic, Tails, and himself to meet their classic counterparts. Eggman works together with his past self, Classic Eggman (formerly Classic Robotnik; in the doctor's own words, "Nobody calls me that anymore"), to attempt to vanquish Sonic once and for all. As expected, Classic Sonic and Modern Sonic defeat the Time Eater, and both doctors wind up stranded outside the space-time continuum. Classic Eggman suggests the doctors could obtain their teaching degrees once they escape, which surprises most people as they were starting to doubt whether Dr. Pingas could even read by this point.

Book of 8Gen[edit]

In Sonic Lost World (2013), in an interesting (or not) role-reversal, Eggman teams up with Sonic not at the end of the game, but at the beginning, to defeat a group of Saturday morning cartoon mooks called the Deadly Six. At the end of the game, Eggman backstabs Sonic and is fought as the final boss of the game; after his defeat, Eggman attempts to escape, but finds that his jetpack was sabotaged by Sonic, and thus he falls billions of feet down to Earth. In real life, Eggman would've surely died, but here, he is shown to have survived his fall by landing on a soft spot of dirt. His bumbling robot servants dig him out, but not before — in an especially humiliating defeat — a rabbit chews off half of his glorious mustache.

In Sonic Mania (2017), set between Sonic & Knuckles and Sonic Adventure, Classic Robotnik uses the Phantom Ruby to send Classic Sonic through time, but then is defeated because he couldn't use it that well. In Sonic Mania Plus (2018), Robotnik does the same thing with the Phantom Ruby but it happens in a different time of day and he fails again because he is so idiotic that he doesn't even try a new plan.

In Sonic Forces (2017), Eggman tries to take over the world by marking a jackal that yelled "I am not weak" into a generic edged no-actual-substance murder-enjoying shell of a person by using the Phantom Ruby. He did this to defeat Sonic then locks him up for six months and takes over the world via text box. He does nothing new while ruling the world. After three days Eggman is defeated by Sonic, Sonic from the past, and the self-insert player OC.

Book of Paramount[edit]

In the Sonic the Hedgehog (2020) movie, Eggman changed his name back to Robotnik, lost a crap ton of weight, and got hair transplants. Now he works for the military to capture Sonic, who was a thicc alien before he got surgery. He wants to use Sonic totally-original powers (which aren't like The Flash) for world domination. He's played by the very attractive Jim Carrey, who also happens to dance in this movie. Robotnik also wants Sonic's rings (which aren't like Dr. Strange's sling rings), and manages to get ahold of a piece of Sonic's magical hair to power his machines. At the end however, he's defeated by Sonic and sent to an alien planet with giant mushrooms (which looks nothing like Mushroom Hill). He now looks like Classic Robotnik from the games, which is how viewers wanted him to look for the whole movie.

Footnotes[edit]

  1. Whether the mediocre spinoff games, such as Sonic 3D Blast and Knuckles Chaotix, should count as half towards the total is the cause of continuing debate by retro gamers.
  2. Oh yeah, did I tell you about the ARK? It belittled the Death Egg about as much as the Death Star being built by grasshopper people.