Babel:W2
December 2: International Boring Nordic Culture Heritage Day
- 6000 BCE - Mankind is born from the toil of an ice giant melting into the ocean. At least that's what Viking creationists say.
- 432 - Thor gets arrested in Valhalla after being accused of destroying an orphanage while drunk chariot driving. Embarrassed, the Nordic people begin converting to Christianity.
- 793 - Vikings visit Lindisfarne Abbey in northern England, bringing home a suspicious amount of souvenirs.
- 900 - Erik the Red, a Viking explorer and real estate agent, discovers a big block of ice, utterly unsuitable for human life. He gives it the name "Greenland" to attract customers.
- 957 - A third of Denmark's population dies, victims of the mysterious "axe in the head" plague.
- 966 - Vikings reach Constantinople, bringing home alabaster chess sets and cheap carpets as souvenirs.
- 1000 - Explorer and murderer Leif Erikson discovers America, but realizes his mistake in time and lets Columbus and Vespucci have all the blame.
- 1429 - Hamlet, Prince of Denmark, decides not to be, and disappears immediately.
- 1755 - Danish pastries are first introduced to non-Danes, this time without the axe in the head followup.
- 1859 - Hans Christian Andersen writes The Emperor Is a Nudist, a beloved fairy tale. Andersen would leave unfinished the sequel The Empire Strikes Back.
- 1916 - Europe is at war. Swedes have an excellent game of bridge.
- 1940 - Europe is at war again. Swedes read a lot of good books.
- 2010 - Bruce Willis is declared legally bald.
- Prince Andrew to go into permanent exile (pictured)
Alexander the Not So Great | Dubnium (pictured) | Hebe | Carbon tetrachloride | Tetrachloroethylene | Northrop B-2 Spirit | Blue Fairies | People's Action Party (Singapore) | Woof | John Mahama | Vivek Ramaswamy | Norse Korea | Michael VI | Factorial | Bunsen burner | Queue | Odysseus | Mutually exclusive events | Calcium | Kristi Noem | Anti-Zionism | Kevin McCarthy | Mike Johnson | House of Bourbon | Akaa, Finland | Nikki Haley | Menelaus | Ajax | Air Canada | Agamemnon | Great Schism
December 2, 2025
Okay guys, today you get the usual bidaily update of the featured article. Here comes the synopsis!
Today's featured article – St. Pierre and Miquelon
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St. Pierre and Michelob (technically, the Territorial Collectivity of Saint Pierre et Michelob; French: Collectivité territoriale de Saint-Pierre-et-Michelob), is an archipelago of small islands off the coast of eastern Canada, the main islands being St. Pierre and Michelob, south of the Canadian province of Newfoundland and Labatt. The islands come within 10 km of Newfoundland.
Within France, the archipelago has the status of "territorial collectivity" because it sounds more dignified than "neglected islands". Its residents are French citizens; they elect one Deputy to the National Assembly — though, in view of the territory's population (6,008 as of the 2016 census, which was thereafter disbanded), he is only allowed to vote on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. They are also allowed to hold opinions on Senator and President.
St. Pierre and Michelob is all that is left of the once-sprawling North American empire of "New France". (Quebec aspires to the same status, but every time Parisians hear that accent, they are glad they cut them loose.) Acadia broke ties with the territory when it became evident that the islanders were even lazier and more cowardly than the Acadians. It is notable for being France's only remaining possession in North America, and if France washes its hands too, it will not have any notability. (more...)
Previously featured article – Minotaur
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The Minotaur was a half-human, half-bull creature in Greek mythology. Rather than a domestic cow, the bovine parent was an auroch, now extinct, as opposed to an auror, which is hoped to be extinct. The tale is probably a manifestation of man’s historic fascination with cow sex. The odd combination of species stands as proof of Creationism, though not by the usual expected deity. (more...)
As usual, you can vote for the featured article at Uncyclopedia 2.0:VFH, and don't forget to visit the archive! Rc out.
December 2, 2025
- ... that the A Train is "a" train?
- ... that Martin Van Buren is a total dick and nobody likes him?
- ... that the A Train is "a" train?
- ... that Martin Van Buren is a total dick and nobody likes him?
- ... that the A Train is "a" train?
And some others, in case you missed them...
December 2, 2025
One more image added to the collection. The list rotates randomly, so try reloading the page to see others...
DogLabels.png
| DogLabels.png - 42.5 total votes ( 42.5 / 0 ) |
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 By popular demand, the National Pet Association has released a new guide for the best household chemicals to use for exploding your dog. Caveat Canem, indeed. Image credit: MoneySign |
Or if you're so impatient, see Template 2.0:FI/all for all currently featured images. This creap of the crop may be less AJAXy than Flickr, but way less crappy.
December 2, 2025
Congratulations for December's Writer and Noob of the Month!
Seriously, we love you.
Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!
HEIL FROSTY!
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