Babel:W2
June 29: Make Crude Jokes About Genitals Day
- 34CE - Ducks first start making jokes about their corkscrew genitalia.
- 1034 - Court eunuchs in China spend a quiet day with nothing to say.
- 1194 - Sverre is crowned King of Norway, beginning a long reign of Danish kings with unpronounceable names.
- 1542 - The comic strip Calvin and Hobbes debuts, lightheartedly poking fun at such contemporary topics as the Protestant Reformation. (pictured)
- 1758 - Edmond Halley patents Halley's Comet, charging everyone who sees it three pence. He makes only about 5/- but hopes for more the next time the comet returns.
- 1807 - Sharks curiously stop making jokes about human genitals before they attack people.
- 1884 - The Picture of Dorian Gray is released by Oscar Wilde, consisting largely of crude jokes about genitals.
- 1939 - The Colonel Bogey March is originally written to be sung by castrotti.
- 1965 - The auto accident starting the "Paul is dead" hoax occurs in England. It is actually the other 3 Beatles who die.
- 1972 - The U.S. Supreme Court rules the death penalty could constitute 'cruel and unusual punishment', particularly the more outlandish methods of carrying out the sentence, such as Texas' legendary alligator tank.
- 1985 - Your mom sees my wiener for the eightieth time. And likes it as much as she did the first time.
- 1986 - I discover my mom likes your weiner because she collects McDonald's coffee stirrers.
- 1999 - Prince continues to party.
- 2009 - Millions of Americans suffering from insomnia are miraculously cured when Jimmy Fallon receives his own late night talk show.
- Qatar gifts Trump an airplane (pictured)
People's Action Party (Singapore) (pictured) | Woof | John Mahama | Vivek Ramaswamy | Norse Korea | Michael VI | Factorial | Bunsen burner | Queue | Odysseus | Mutually exclusive events | Calcium | Kristi Noem | Anti-Zionism | Kevin McCarthy | Mike Johnson | House of Bourbon | Akaa, Finland | Nikki Haley | Menelaus | Ajax | Air Canada | Agamemnon | Great Schism
June 29, 2025
Okay guys, today you get the usual bidaily update of the featured article. Here comes the synopsis!
Today's featured article – Chess pieces
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Chess is often thought of as a game for pretentious tossers, and for teenage nerds in need of a competitive pastime that doesn’t necessarily end with them being wedgied. But this image is outdated. These days the game is also played by boxers desperate to show that repeated brain trauma has not affected their intelligence.
Though some rules of the game have been adapted slowly over the millennia, the pieces have remained mostly unchanged and continue to move in much the same way as they did for intellectual wannabes in ancient India, friendless geeks in Sassanid Persia, and social inadequates in Moorish Spain.
When a game begins, each side starts with eight pawns (Australian English: Shrimps) - twelve short of a barbie. As the least valuable and most expendable member of your army, your pawns should be assigned a place in the front rank of the infantry. Do not waste body-armour or weapons on these grunts. Advanced players use terror and centuries of oppression to compel their pawns to advance unarmed and unarmoured across the open battlefield, even in the face of airborne attack from the Rooks. (more...)
Previously featured article – John Mahama
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John Dramani Mahama (born 29 November 1958) is the 12th and 14th President of Ghana, his current term having begun on 7 January 2025. Ghanaian voters were inspired by Donald Trump being both the 45th and 47th U.S. President and anxious to prove that Ghana could do it too. They were also ready for another go, having had four years to recover from Mahama's first Presidency. (more...)
As usual, you can vote for the featured article at Uncyclopedia 2.0:VFH, and don't forget to visit the archive! Rc out.
June 29, 2025
- ... that Uranus is a gas giant?
- ... that GPSs accidentally dropped in the ocean have caused whales to become confused and try to migrate to Oklahoma?
- ... that Uranus is a gas giant?
- ... that GPSs accidentally dropped in the ocean have caused whales to become confused and try to migrate to Oklahoma?
- ... that Uranus is a gas giant?
And some others, in case you missed them...
June 29, 2025
One more image added to the collection. The list rotates randomly, so try reloading the page to see others...
BSoD box art.png
| BSoD box art.png - 6 total votes ( 6 / 0 ) |
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 Insert image caption here Image credit: Uyabba |
Or if you're so impatient, see Template 2.0:FI/all for all currently featured images. This creap of the crop may be less AJAXy than Flickr, but way less crappy.
June 29, 2025
Congratulations for June's Writer and Noob of the Month!
Seriously, we love you.
Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!
HEIL FROSTY!
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