From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation
Jump to search
Rest In Peace brave souls
|
|
|
|
| Today's Featured Article
|
In Memoriam
Is it with great sadness that Uncyclopedia must report the loss of two of the most beloved members of the Uncyclopedian Community. A day of mourning has been announced.
Todd "Howlin'" Lyons and Some "Fingers" User worked tirelessly for the betterment of others, and both in their own unique ways have improved and left their mark on the Uncyclopedia you see before you today. Their self sacrifice will long be remembered, and plans are underway to erect a fitting monument, the Tomb of the Unknown Contributor.
A minute's deletion is to be observed.
|
| On this day...
|
|
March 18: Suicide-by-Boasting Day, National RAD day (pictured) (UK, 1989-2000, 2007), End of the Boob Festival (Neptune)
- c.51,000 BC - World Happiness Day is declared with a series of rhythmic grunts when two Homo erecti discover fire.
- 1904 - Dessie Noonan is the first to commit suicide by boasting.
- 1906 - Pope declares suicide by boasting a mortal sin, worse than butt sex, watching anime and murder.
- 1906 - Pope says his decree was best decree ever. He is found dead in a hotel outside Reno, NV with a syringe in his arm.
- 1953 - President Joseph McCarthy briefly bans kitten huffing, but later retracts said decree, claiming he "was high off [his] ass."
- 1954 - Scientists discover the Moon.
- 1955 - Scientists find out it wasn't really the Moon they discovered, but the Sun.
- 1966 - The Evelyn War ends, and Michelle Pfeiffer, a secret code developed by Captain Obvious, officially replaces traditional right-to-left writing, as decreed by the Kansas Board of Education
- 1991 - Rad Suits become the latest craze in the UK, after teen hero Margaret Thatcher is seen in one.
- 1992 - Michael Jackson re-releases Bad as Rad. However, no-one is impressed when it is just the same track with "rad" replacing "bad" in the lyrics, and the song does very badly. This causes him to turn a paler shade.
- 1994 - Tears for Fears reach Number One on the new show Top of the Flops. They would have reached Number One on Top of the Pops, but failed to say "rad" during the entire song.
- 2000 - Rad Day is abolished after the phrase isn't considered rad anymore.
- 2005 - Rick James dies of chronic diarrhea... finally!
- 2007 - Rad Day returns for one year with a concert featuring Michael Jackson. The 10 people that attended say things were "Like, well rad init."
- 2008 - After numerous requests by the American public, God finally damns it. It is never seen again.
|
|
| Word of the Day
|
Death
Try to use it in conversation.
Knowledge is power.
|
| In the news
|
- Oscar Wilde writes a poem showing what he thinks about the deaths of Some User and Todd Lyons(he misses them very much).
- Editors of uncyclopedia.wikia.com die and appoint earwig-human hybrid to manage Recent News.
- Jesus was revived. But Norwegian Space Ottars mistook him for a fish and buried him in their gardens. He died.
- Gothic people slit their wrists and write tragic poems, nothing newsworthy there...
- The emos commit mass suicide, but nobody cares...duh...
- Mourners flow through the streets of New York in melodramatic fashion,
demonstrating, parading, blocking traffic and inciting riots.
- All Uncyclopedians are wearing black armbands.
- The Japanese are comitting mass seppuku.
- The British are maintaining a stiff upper lip. In France, rioting ensues.
- Physicists at IITb publish a paper no one could understand. Basically they wanted 1 hour of strict mourning to be observed.
- The State Department for Social Security will NOT pay successors' pensions to the relatives.
- All the Russians are drunk. All the Dutch are stoned. Peyote use at an alarming high among Native Americans.
- In the middle east the streets are full of women wailing loudly.
- The Americans have organised a drive through service.
a duh /b/ was here
|
| If anyone cares on a day like today...
|
*... that a 40 foot tall pine tree is almost always taller than a 30 foot tall one?
- ... dihydrogen monoxide is a substance found in car exhaust, pesticides, acid rain, and YOUR ENERGY DRINK!?!?!
|
|
| Today's featured Tombstone
|
[vote]
| Fifa2010 logo.png - 19 bullets in a soccer player ( 19 / 0 )
|
|
The revised logo for the 2010 FIFA World Cup in South Africa has been designed to incorporate the host nation's actual national sport...
Image credit: Sonje
|
Archive - Nominate new image
|
|
|
|
|
|
Protected by Sacred Ground, and our Prayers.
