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Welcome to Uncyclopedia in Mourning, the content-free encyclopedia that we wished Some User and Todd Lyons still edited Rest In Peace brave souls

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Nothingness More Dead All are Death

Today's Featured Article In Memoriam Is it with great sadness that Uncyclopedia must report the loss of two of the most beloved members of the Uncyclopedian Community. A day of mourning has been announced. Todd "Howlin'" Lyons and Some "Fingers" User worked tirelessly for the betterment of others, and both in their own unique ways have improved and left their mark on the Uncyclopedia you see before you today. Their self sacrifice will long be remembered, and plans are underway to erect a fitting monument, the Tomb of the Unknown Contributor. A minute's deletion is to be observed. edit On this day... May 28: International Celebration of Belly Button Lint A Long Time Ago - Satan was born without a belly button but with lint. 1515 - Marco Polo discovers belly button lint during his travel to China. 1516 - Marco Polo returns to Italy with several tons of belly button lint. 1590 - Doubts arise about the true origins of Marco Polo's belly button lint. 1781 - Hip Hop is forbidden by Pope B.J. IV. The prohibition lasts until 1998; its ending triggers the renaissance of hip hop. 1854 - Pasteur discovers a method to identify belly button lint, but he is murdered by Marco Polo heirs who want to keep their monopoly. 1855 - Angry Pasteur followers march to Italy seeking for revenge, ravaging the city, raving mad. 1953 - Dupont synthesizes belly button lint for the first time; product sales go sky high. 1979 - The first sighting of an extremely rare belly button lint & tumbleweed crossbreed is sighted by an old man in a ghost town. He falls asleep shortly after. 1984 - Belly button lint damages Space Shuttle controls, leaving the ship marooned in space. 2004 - Iraq acknowledges having huge amounts of belly button lint hidden in secret silos. 2005 - China sues Italy for reparations for belly button lint allegedly plundered by "imperialist capitalist pig dogs" in the Middle Ages. Italian courts deny all knowledge of these so-called "Middle Ages." 2005 - Transformers land on Earth, dance to Weird Al Yankovic and introduce the phrase "Bah Weep Graaagnah Wheep Ni Ni Bong" to Americans, and leave later that day to make way for Akira. 2026 - IB Maths students rebel, take over the world and ban the use of numbers in digit form in order to save the lives of future students. 2027 - IB Maths rebels are awarded Nobel Peace Prize for saving the lives of countless IB students.	Word of the Day Death Try to use it in conversation. Knowledge is power. edit In the news Oscar Wilde writes a poem showing what he thinks about the deaths of Some User and Todd Lyons(he misses them very much). Editors of uncyclopedia.wikia.com die and appoint earwig-human hybrid to manage Recent News. Jesus was revived. But Norwegian Space Ottars mistook him for a fish and buried him in their gardens. He died. Gothic people slit their wrists and write tragic poems, nothing newsworthy there... The emos commit mass suicide, but nobody cares...duh... Mourners flow through the streets of New York in melodramatic fashion, demonstrating, parading, blocking traffic and inciting riots. All Uncyclopedians are wearing black armbands. The Japanese are comitting mass seppuku. The British are maintaining a stiff upper lip. In France, rioting ensues. Physicists at IITb publish a paper no one could understand. Basically they wanted 1 hour of strict mourning to be observed. The State Department for Social Security will NOT pay successors' pensions to the relatives. All the Russians are drunk. All the Dutch are stoned. Peyote use at an alarming high among Native Americans. In the middle east the streets are full of women wailing loudly. The Americans have organised a drive through service. a duh /b/ was here edit If anyone cares on a day like today... *... that Afghanistan is known for its lush dirt farms, where dirt and dust are cultivated by villagers to enhance the scenic emptiness for which the region is known? ... you can't skip this GEICO ad, because it's already over?
Today's featured Tombstone [vote] Vaderguild.jpg Vaderguild.jpg - 19 tiny rebels, 10 tiny toes ( 19 / 0 ) Never underestimate the power of the dwarf. Image credit: Modusoperandi Archive - Nominate new image
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Writer and Noob of the Month Oh great....another award for Todd.....(mutters darkly)....lets all be pleased for him.....(mumble, mumble)..... It's a bird! It's a plane! It's....Todd Lyons! Blasting through his competition, Todd sails to the lead with Richard M. Stallman at his right and OCD in his head. ToddBot2000 by day and Article Mastermind by night, his genius speaks for itself. "An incomparably superior human being," the Count of Monkey Crisco is known for his excellent work and knows it. Spawning such contributions as Midget cockpunching terrorists and an Evil Cookie Monster, the Count has left an indelible bootprint on the face of Uncyclopedia, forever. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners: 2005/2006 You now only have 3, goddamnit 3 days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month, GET VOTING!!

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