From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation
Jump to search
Rest In Peace brave souls
|
|
|
|
| Today's Featured Article
|
In Memoriam
Is it with great sadness that Uncyclopedia must report the loss of two of the most beloved members of the Uncyclopedian Community. A day of mourning has been announced.
Todd "Howlin'" Lyons and Some "Fingers" User worked tirelessly for the betterment of others, and both in their own unique ways have improved and left their mark on the Uncyclopedia you see before you today. Their self sacrifice will long be remembered, and plans are underway to erect a fitting monument, the Tomb of the Unknown Contributor.
A minute's deletion is to be observed.
|
| On this day...
|
|
April 21: Rome's Birthday (Italy)
- 1700 BCE - Emperor Palpatine kills Jamie Lynn Spears and then uses the Force to get Shmi Skywalker pregnant with Anakin.
- 753 BCE - Rome is founded by Romulus and Remus after building it in a day.
- 752 BCE - The Romulans declare an uneasy truce with the rest of the humans on Earth.
- 749 BCE - A group of Romulans unable to get dates known as the 'vool-cahns' decide to leave Earth and start their own planet.
- 1349 - The Spanish Inquisition is not expected.
- 1350 - A Belgian man expects the Spanish Inquisition, and is promptly beaten to death.
- 1684 - Isaac Newton proposes the idea of "gravity". It is rejected by non-seculars, and Newton is laughed at and beaten.
- 1836 - Sam Houston royally teabags Santa Anna and his sleepy Mexicans.
- 1900 - Creamed corn is deemed just thing to spice up that Sunday dinner.
- 1918 - French whores rejoice: "The Yanks are cumming" proves true and profitable.
- 1955 - Bob Hope decides this radio thing is old and busted. If only he knew.
- 1966 - The Girl from Ipanema is discovered to be like a samba that, swings so cool and sways so gentle, that when she passes each one she passes goes "a-a-ah!"
- 2003 - Homosexuals finally learn to use a keyboard with two hands.
- 2006 - April 21st decides to change its name to July 14th. July 14th does not approve and in retaliation changes its name to August 25th, and refuses to acknowledge the month of April any more. This leads to a mass surge in calendar production when everyone takes sides - April lovers stick to the original 12 month calendar, whereas July fanciers take up a new streamlined 11 month number, with pictures of kittens on it. Everything goes back to normal the next day when Mr. T pities April 21st.
- 2010 - The Spanish Inquisition expects the Spanish Inquisition, and is promptly befuddled resulting in an impromptu tea/ riverdance party that leads to the very fabric of space and time ripping apart. The noitisiuqnI hsinapS meanwhile is not amused.
|
|
| Word of the Day
|
Death
Try to use it in conversation.
Knowledge is power.
|
| In the news
|
- Oscar Wilde writes a poem showing what he thinks about the deaths of Some User and Todd Lyons(he misses them very much).
- Editors of uncyclopedia.wikia.com die and appoint earwig-human hybrid to manage Recent News.
- Jesus was revived. But Norwegian Space Ottars mistook him for a fish and buried him in their gardens. He died.
- Gothic people slit their wrists and write tragic poems, nothing newsworthy there...
- The emos commit mass suicide, but nobody cares...duh...
- Mourners flow through the streets of New York in melodramatic fashion,
demonstrating, parading, blocking traffic and inciting riots.
- All Uncyclopedians are wearing black armbands.
- The Japanese are comitting mass seppuku.
- The British are maintaining a stiff upper lip. In France, rioting ensues.
- Physicists at IITb publish a paper no one could understand. Basically they wanted 1 hour of strict mourning to be observed.
- The State Department for Social Security will NOT pay successors' pensions to the relatives.
- All the Russians are drunk. All the Dutch are stoned. Peyote use at an alarming high among Native Americans.
- In the middle east the streets are full of women wailing loudly.
- The Americans have organised a drive through service.
a duh /b/ was here
|
| If anyone cares on a day like today...
|
*... when your grandma said, "You gruesome", you misunderstood and proudly stood up as tall as you could?
- ... that the answer is Colonel Mustard in the drawing room with a candlestick?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Protected by Sacred Ground, and our Prayers.
