Portal:Religion

Portal:Religion

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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Religion portal. By far the holiest portal you will ever find.

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Religion is the act of worshipping a creed or deity in which one has mistakenly attributed supernatural powers. 'True Believers' are also known as schizophrenic or having a neurological disorder in scientific, medical, or sane circles. It was invented by tribal leaders at least 2 million years ago in order to control and financially exploit the citizenry and in the Western proper World was still going strong until the separation of Church and State. In the 3rd or improper World it's business as usual. Typically god is portrayed as a giant bearded dragon in the sky that flies around granting wishes, and invoking his wrath. But there are other variations.

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Highlighted Featured Article

Limitations of Superpowers as Applies to God

“I am God, in my own little world.”

~ Oscar Wilde on Limitations of Superpowers as Applies to God

“I was an atheist, before I realized I was God!”

~ Simon Cowell on the many forms of God

Supernatural powers come in many forms, from the tingly spidey-sense of Spiderman to the Squeak-Vomit Attack of Pikachu. Of course the epynonymous hero, Superman, has a whole bunch of them.

But nobody is more super than the Christian God. Not even kryptonite can defeat His superpowers.

However, He is definitely limited in His abilities. more

(more...)

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Highlighted Image

Jesus survived 40 days in the desert, thanks to his trusty automatic weapon.

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Books and Other Media

UnBooks - UnBooks:The Nearly-Chaste Mormon's Guide to Quitting Masturbation

UnScripts - UnScripts:Who built the moon

Unfomercials - Unfomercials:Religious Leader Trumps

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Religion in the News

• UnNews:Man who claimed to have found God arrested for wasting police time

• UnNews:Poor planning ruins Rapture

• UnNews:Ahmadinejad: Holocaust Was Really Big Gay Jew Sex Party

• UnNews:Haggard feels "fabulous!"

• UnNews:Couple goes to Kingdom Hall by mistake

• UnNews:Falwell starts campaign against God

• UnNews:OU Coach Bob Stoops: Boise St. must've cheated, somehow

• UnNews:Limbo closes, millions homeless

• UnNews:Prophet strikes, Heaven grinds to halt

• UnNews:Stop dressing like whores, you whores!

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Quote of the Week

“It's the smart way to get out.”

~ Oscar Wilde on Jehovah witness protection program

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Did you know...

• ...that Buddhists have higher cancer rates than Eskimos?
• ...God is pissed off?
• ...that Religion is the longest running joke ever?
• ...that Jews souls are made out of bucky balls?
• ...Glenn Beck cries on television because he's a Mormon?
• ...Zoroaster drives Uhurus Mazda?
• ...Bahais have the best bud?
• ...good Muslims only get 61 virgins after taxes?
• ...Mayan prophesies predicted Quantum Computing?
• ...the Shinto religion encourages rabid badger juggling?
• ...that Jesus Christ really hated sand?
• ...that Buddah became overweight after his dad called him a Commercialist?

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Spiritually Bankrupt Articles

Religion

'Til Eulenspiegel's merry pranks - Anti-Muhammed - Bahá'í - Colonialism - Divine Retribution - Eris Discordia - Father Christmas - Great Commission Ministries - Hinduism - Intelligent Falling - Judas Eukaryote - Kabbalah - Linguistic Creationism - Magic Pantheism - Organised religion - Shirley Phelps-Roper - Quakerism - Reformed Church of Alfredo - Saint Augustine - The Great Flood - Unitarian Universalism - Virtue - Why?:Join a Satanic cult - XBible 360 - Yad -

Zombie Christianity

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Religious Articles That Need Help

Anti-Semitism - Bhagavad Gita - Cyndi Lauper - Deity Election - Ed MacMahon - Freeslam - Gods - Herpes - It's hard out here for a pimp - JR "Bob" Dobbs - Kansas Board of Education - Martin Luther King Jr. - Mosque - Neo-Confusionism - Original sin - Protestantism - Qu'ran Canker Sore 31 - Republican Jesus - Smart - Televangelism - U2 - Veggiestrology - Wikipedianity -

Zucchini