Portal:Religion
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Religion is the act of worshipping a creed or deity in which one has mistakenly attributed supernatural powers. 'True Believers' are also known as schizophrenic or having a neurological disorder in scientific, medical, or sane circles. It was invented by tribal leaders at least 2 million years ago in order to control and financially exploit the citizenry and in the Western proper World was still going strong until the separation of Church and State. In the 3rd or improper World it's business as usual. Typically god is portrayed as a giant bearded dragon in the sky that flies around granting wishes, and invoking his wrath. But there are other variations.
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Dake-Bonoism
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Dake-Bonoism is a modern synthesis of the pentecostal teachings of the late Rev. Finis Jennings Dake and lyrical writings of Bono (lead singer for the popular Irish band U2). Dake-Bonoism is controversial to many because it combines the worlds of rock music and fundagelical Christianity. Many in both camps see these as incompatible with each other.
Sources of Inspiration[edit]
Dake-Bonoists accept the plenary inspiration of the Protestant, King James Version Bible as authoritative and complete for matters of doctrine and discipline. They also accept two other primary sources of inspiration:
- the articles and notes authored by Rev. Dake, as contained in the Dake Annotated Reference Bible (commonly known as the Dake Study Bible); and
- the song lyrics penned by Bono for U2's studio albums.
The movement views the Dake and Bono materials as harmonizing in a way that can only be described as Providential. The combination of the two inspired sources provides an unbeatable combination of theology, poetry, wisdom, and stylishness.
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If McGuyver were a Messiah, this move would convince all infidels of his holy power to kick ass.
Books and Other Media
UnBooks - UnBooks:The Nearly-Chaste Mormon's Guide to Quitting Masturbation
UnScripts - UnScripts:Genesis, Episode II: In the Garden of Eden
Unfomercials - Unfomercials:Religious Leader Trumps
Religion in the News
Quote of the Week
“Eh, it's fine, really. No big deal. I'm not offended.”
- ~ God on Apatheism
Did you know...
- ...that Buddhists have higher cancer rates than Eskimos?
- ...God is pissed off?
- ...that Religion is the longest running joke ever?
- ...that Jews souls are made out of bucky balls?
- ...Glenn Beck cries on television because he's a Mormon?
- ...Zoroaster drives Uhurus Mazda?
- ...Bahais have the best bud?
- ...good Muslims only get 61 virgins after taxes?
- ...Mayan prophesies predicted Quantum Computing?
- ...the Shinto religion encourages rabid badger juggling?
- ...that Jesus Christ really hated sand?
- ...that Buddah became overweight after his dad called him a Commercialist?
Spiritually Bankrupt Articles
'Til Eulenspiegel's merry pranks - Anti-Muhammed - Boristany - Crisis in Infinite Jerusalems - Dark Lord - Existence of God - Father Christmas - God Hates Australia - Holy Week - Intelligent Design By Committee - Judas Eukaryote - Kaspar Hauser - LaVeyan Vegetarianism - Mazda - Organised religion - Prophet polywag - Quakerism - Robert Tilton - Salvation - The Second Coming Project - Unintelligent Design - Virtue - What was God thinking!? - XBible 360 - Yah-Weh-Oh! -
ZoroasterReligious Articles That Need Help
Anti-Semitism - Bhagavad Gita - Confusionism - Duckism - Existence - Freeslam - Gay Jesus - Holy Market - It takes a good Muslim to work out good Islamic jokes - Jeohovas witness - Kansas Board of Education - Martin Luther King Jr. - Male Reproductive System: Attorney At Law - Nun - Original sin - Protestantism - Qu'ran Canker Sore 31 - Rapist - Spiritual - The Midnight Sun - Un-religion - Veggiestrology - Wikipedianity -
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