Portal:Religion
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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Religion portal.
By far the holiest portal you will ever find. |
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Religion is the act of worshipping a creed or deity in which one has mistakenly attributed supernatural powers. 'True Believers' are also known as schizophrenic or having a neurological disorder in scientific, medical, or sane circles. It was invented by tribal leaders at least 2 million years ago in order to control and financially exploit the citizenry and in the Western proper World was still going strong until the separation of Church and State. In the 3rd or improper World it's business as usual. Typically god is portrayed as a giant bearded dragon in the sky that flies around granting wishes, and invoking his wrath. But there are other variations.
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Answers in Genesis
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Answers in Genesis is a satirical Christian ministry that parodies the genuine Pastafarian ministry Answers in the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. It aims to portray Christians as mouth breathing, arm swinging retards who sit on their high horse and spend all day whining about how horrible the world is today and how oh so nice it was during the Dark Ages.
The website often has joke articles which say things like "Darwinism is the central column of laissez-faire economics and Stalinism" (capitalism and communism at the same time - I guess it's easy to hit opposite sides at the same time when you're continually beating a dead horse) and "the secular parts of the world are morally corrupt; I'd much rather live in Saudi Arabia than in France". Sarcastic comments like this are made by world renowned stand up comedian, Oxford nerd and atheist Richard Dawkins.
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Books and Other Media
UnBooks - UnBooks:DIY and Carpentry Tips by Jesus Christ
UnScripts - UnScripts:Who built the moon
Unfomercials - Unfomercials:Religious Leader Trumps
Religion in the News
Quote of the Week
“To think I kissed her (or him) there--and there--and there'!”
- ~ Sarah Michelle Gellar on Baphomet.
Did you know...
- ...that Buddhists have higher cancer rates than Eskimos?
- ...God is pissed off?
- ...that Religion is the longest running joke ever?
- ...that Jews souls are made out of bucky balls?
- ...Glenn Beck cries on television because he's a Mormon?
- ...Zoroaster drives Uhurus Mazda?
- ...Bahais have the best bud?
- ...good Muslims only get 61 virgins after taxes?
- ...Mayan prophesies predicted Quantum Computing?
- ...the Shinto religion encourages rabid badger juggling?
- ...that Jesus Christ really hated sand?
- ...that Buddah became overweight after his dad called him a Commercialist?
Spiritually Bankrupt Articles
'Til Eulenspiegel's merry pranks - Adam Smith - Boristany - Coprophilia - Duct tape - Eris Discordia - Family First Party - God v. Nietzsche - Hinduism - Is the bear a Catholic? - Jebus - Karma - Linguistic Creationism - Mormons - Odin - Papercupism - Qu'ran - Religious relic trading - Society of Jesus - Tourette's Syndrome/Amish - Unfomercials:Religious Leader Trumps - Virtue - Wild Jews - XBible 360 - Yiddish -
Zombie JesusReligious Articles That Need Help
Anti-Semitism - Belief - Chromosome 47 - Doomsday - Easter of the Living Dead - Fuck it - God Steiger - Heresy - It's hard out here for a pimp - Jeohovas witness - Kansas Board of Education - Martin Luther King Jr. - Mose - Neo-Confusionism - Original sin - Passion of the Christ - Quakers - Rapist - Santa Claus - That 700 Club - Ultimate Question - Veggiestrology - We Are Scientists -
Zucchini