Portal:Religion
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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Religion portal.
By far the holiest portal you will ever find. |
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Religion is the act of worshipping a creed or deity in which one has mistakenly attributed supernatural powers. 'True Believers' are also known as schizophrenic or having a neurological disorder in scientific, medical, or sane circles. It was invented by tribal leaders at least 2 million years ago in order to control and financially exploit the citizenry and in the Western proper World was still going strong until the separation of Church and State. In the 3rd or improper World it's business as usual. Typically god is portrayed as a giant bearded dragon in the sky that flies around granting wishes, and invoking his wrath. But there are other variations.
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The artist formerly known as God
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God (born God Cohen in 4004BC in Liverpool, England) is one of the most famous and prolific musicians in the Western world. Though he recorded under the name God during his early career, a contractual dispute with his former label led him to change his recording name to YHVH. Due to YHVH being an unpronounceable set of consonants, he is most often referred to as "The Artist Formerly Known as God," "TAFKAG," or simply "The Artist." Throughout his career he has embraced many styles of music and is cited as an influence by a wide array of current artists.
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The Messiah, goes to Heaven for three days, to let his Father borrow His glue gun.
Books and Other Media
UnBooks - UnBooks:The Autobiography of Jesus of Nazareth
UnScripts - UnScripts:Genesis, Episode II: In the Garden of Eden
Unfomercials - Unfomercials:Religious Leader Trumps
Religion in the News
Quote of the Week
“It's the smart way to get out.”
- ~ Oscar Wilde on Jehovah witness protection program
Did you know...
- ...that Buddhists have higher cancer rates than Eskimos?
- ...God is pissed off?
- ...that Religion is the longest running joke ever?
- ...that Jews souls are made out of bucky balls?
- ...Glenn Beck cries on television because he's a Mormon?
- ...Zoroaster drives Uhurus Mazda?
- ...Bahais have the best bud?
- ...good Muslims only get 61 virgins after taxes?
- ...Mayan prophesies predicted Quantum Computing?
- ...the Shinto religion encourages rabid badger juggling?
- ...that Jesus Christ really hated sand?
- ...that Buddah became overweight after his dad called him a Commercialist?
Spiritually Bankrupt Articles
'Til Eulenspiegel's merry pranks - A proper Christian burial - Bonerism - Christian Right - Dark Lord - Eris Discordia - Fecundism strategy - God v. Nietzsche - HowTo:Start a Religion - Ignatius of Loyola - Jew Beanie - Karma - Loki - Mormons - Noddy - Prophecy - Quakerism - Ray Comfort - Saint Augustine - Torah - Unquotable:God - Voidism - Walpurgisnacht - XBible 360 - Yenta -
Zombie ChristianityReligious Articles That Need Help
Anti-Semitism - Bill (son of God) - Church of Buffy - Driver's License in the World Religions - Eucharist - Fuck it - Gah - Hi-fi - Intolerance - Jesus 2.0 - Kansas Board of Education - Martin Luther King Jr. - Mentalist - New atheism - Original sin - Protestant Reformation - Qu'ran Canker Sore 31 - Ramayana - Space Clowns - Twenty two - United Church of Awesome - Veggiestrology - We Are Scientists -
Zucchini