Portal:Religion
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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Religion portal.
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Religion is the act of worshipping a creed or deity in which one has mistakenly attributed supernatural powers. 'True Believers' are also known as schizophrenic or having a neurological disorder in scientific, medical, or sane circles. It was invented by tribal leaders at least 2 million years ago in order to control and financially exploit the citizenry and in the Western proper World was still going strong until the separation of Church and State. In the 3rd or improper World it's business as usual. Typically god is portrayed as a giant bearded dragon in the sky that flies around granting wishes, and invoking his wrath. But there are other variations.
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Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints[edit]
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“He did too much LDS back in the Sixties.”
“Go forth and multiply!”
Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is the official mascot for the Church of Later Day Saints, a satirical parody of the Roman Catholic Church (as if the Catholics weren't funny enough). He is essentially the same as regular Jesus, only he happens to be blonde and 100% pure, red-blooded American (not to be confused with Stephen Colbert). Disgruntled fans consider him an Expanded Universe addition only, and discount that Jesus ever had blonde hair, since he was a Palestinian Jew and all.
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If McGuyver were a Messiah, this move would convince all infidels of his holy power to kick ass.
Books and Other Media
UnBooks - UnBooks:DIY and Carpentry Tips by Jesus Christ
UnScripts - UnScripts:Who built the moon
Unfomercials - Unfomercials:Religious Leader Trumps
Religion in the News
Quote of the Week
“Eh, it's fine, really. No big deal. I'm not offended.”
- ~ God on Apatheism
Did you know...
- ...that Buddhists have higher cancer rates than Eskimos?
- ...God is pissed off?
- ...that Religion is the longest running joke ever?
- ...that Jews souls are made out of bucky balls?
- ...Glenn Beck cries on television because he's a Mormon?
- ...Zoroaster drives Uhurus Mazda?
- ...Bahais have the best bud?
- ...good Muslims only get 61 virgins after taxes?
- ...Mayan prophesies predicted Quantum Computing?
- ...the Shinto religion encourages rabid badger juggling?
- ...that Jesus Christ really hated sand?
- ...that Buddah became overweight after his dad called him a Commercialist?
Spiritually Bankrupt Articles
'Til Eulenspiegel's merry pranks - Allah: The Annotated Version - Brian Tamaki - Coprophilia - Darwinism - Evil - First Communion - Great Commission Ministries - Haruhiism - ITSCON - Jesus theory - Klestosapharot - Landover Baptist Church - Mugabetheism - Necrophilia - Pope Anacletus - Qu'ran - Keanu Reeves - Sin - The Hitchhiker's Guide To Uncyclopedia - Unfomercials:Religious Leader Trumps - Voidism - Wicca - XBible 360 - Yah-Weh-Oh! -
Zombie ChristianityReligious Articles That Need Help
Atheist Doctrine - Bonsai - Comcast - Deity Election - Easter of the Living Dead - Fuck it - God's masturbation - Heretic - Intolerance - Jeohovas witness - Kansas Board of Education - Martin Luther King Jr. - Monotheism - Neo-Confusionism - Original sin - Passion of the Christ - Qu'ran Canker Sore 31 - Republican Jesus - St. Belia - Tao - Un-religion - Veggiestrology - We Are Scientists -
Zucchini