Portal:Religion

Portal:Religion

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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Religion portal. By far the holiest portal you will ever find.

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Religion is the act of worshipping a creed or deity in which one has mistakenly attributed supernatural powers. 'True Believers' are also known as schizophrenic or having a neurological disorder in scientific, medical, or sane circles. It was invented by tribal leaders at least 2 million years ago in order to control and financially exploit the citizenry and in the Western proper World was still going strong until the separation of Church and State. In the 3rd or improper World it's business as usual. Typically god is portrayed as a giant bearded dragon in the sky that flies around granting wishes, and invoking his wrath. But there are other variations.

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Highlighted Featured Article

Limitations of Superpowers as Applies to God

“I am God, in my own little world.”

~ Oscar Wilde on Limitations of Superpowers as Applies to God

“I was an atheist, before I realized I was God!”

~ Simon Cowell on the many forms of God

Supernatural powers come in many forms, from the tingly spidey-sense of Spiderman to the Squeak-Vomit Attack of Pikachu. Of course the epynonymous hero, Superman, has a whole bunch of them.

But nobody is more super than the Christian God. Not even kryptonite can defeat His superpowers.

However, He is definitely limited in His abilities. more

(more...)

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Highlighted Image

Jesus survived 40 days in the desert, thanks to his trusty automatic weapon.

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Books and Other Media

UnBooks - UnBooks:The Nearly-Chaste Mormon's Guide to Quitting Masturbation

UnScripts - UnScripts:Who built the moon

Unfomercials - Unfomercials:Religious Leader Trumps

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Religion in the News

• UnNews:Face of Jesus discovered on seabed

• UnNews:David Blaine to die for our Sins

• UnNews:God admits "I experimented with evolution"

• UnNews:Chupacabras latest pet craze

• UnNews:Papal proclamation to procure profit for prophet

• UnNews:Obama's divine powers fading

• UnNews:In space, no one can hear the call to prayerl

• UnNews:Militant atheist violence continues

• UnNews:Praying pilot jailed

• UnNews:Third Coming of Jesus Christ Prophesised!

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Quote of the Week

“It means every reaction is followed by an action.”

~ Alfred E. Neuman on Karma.

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Did you know...

• ...that Buddhists have higher cancer rates than Eskimos?
• ...God is pissed off?
• ...that Religion is the longest running joke ever?
• ...that Jews souls are made out of bucky balls?
• ...Glenn Beck cries on television because he's a Mormon?
• ...Zoroaster drives Uhurus Mazda?
• ...Bahais have the best bud?
• ...good Muslims only get 61 virgins after taxes?
• ...Mayan prophesies predicted Quantum Computing?
• ...the Shinto religion encourages rabid badger juggling?
• ...that Jesus Christ really hated sand?
• ...that Buddah became overweight after his dad called him a Commercialist?

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Spiritually Bankrupt Articles

Religion

'Til Eulenspiegel's merry pranks - Apatheism - Jamshid Bauerdinedshad - Christian Science - December 21, 2012 - Eggnogsticism - First Communion - Gnostic - Homosexuology - Is the bear a Catholic? - Jew Beanie - Klestosapharot - Linguistic Creationism - Mazda - New Clothes, (Emperor's), The - Ponyism - Quakerism - Reasons to become an atheist/The Dead Serious Scrolls Version - Sacrifice - Theocracy - Unfomercials:Religious Leader Trumps - Voidism - War on Science - Xenu - YHWH -

Zombie Jesus

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Religious Articles That Need Help

Atheist Doctrine - Brahmin - Cyndi Lauper - Deity Election - Ed MacMahon - Faith - Great Permissive Dude in the Sky Who Lets Us Do Whatever We Want - Hi-fi - Intolerance - JR "Bob" Dobbs - Kansas Board of Education - Martin Luther King Jr. - Monk - Neo-Confusionism - Original sin - Protestant Reformation - Qu'ran Canker Sore 31 - Rapist - Space Clowns - Tao - Ultimate Question - Veggiestrology - We Are Scientists -

Zucchini