Portal:Religion

Portal:Religion

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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Religion portal. By far the holiest portal you will ever find.

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Religion is the act of worshipping a creed or deity in which one has mistakenly attributed supernatural powers. 'True Believers' are also known as schizophrenic or having a neurological disorder in scientific, medical, or sane circles. It was invented by tribal leaders at least 2 million years ago in order to control and financially exploit the citizenry and in the Western proper World was still going strong until the separation of Church and State. In the 3rd or improper World it's business as usual. Typically god is portrayed as a giant bearded dragon in the sky that flies around granting wishes, and invoking his wrath. But there are other variations.

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Highlighted Featured Article

Limitations of Superpowers as Applies to God

“I am God, in my own little world.”

~ Oscar Wilde on Limitations of Superpowers as Applies to God

“I was an atheist, before I realized I was God!”

~ Simon Cowell on the many forms of God

Supernatural powers come in many forms, from the tingly spidey-sense of Spiderman to the Squeak-Vomit Attack of Pikachu. Of course the epynonymous hero, Superman, has a whole bunch of them.

But nobody is more super than the Christian God. Not even kryptonite can defeat His superpowers.

However, He is definitely limited in His abilities. more

(more...)

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Highlighted Image

There is some confusion as to whether Jesus actually rode a raptor, or had a pack of attack raptors.

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Books and Other Media

UnBooks - UnBooks:The Autobiography of Jesus of Nazareth

UnScripts - UnScripts:Who built the moon

Unfomercials - Unfomercials:Religious Leader Trumps

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Religion in the News

• UnNews:Sarah Palin gets done doggy style

• UnNews:David Blaine to die for our Sins

• UnNews:America moves to execute porn stars

• UnNews:Chuck Norris on secularism: the single greatest threat that America has ever faced

• UnNews:Pat Boone warns: "Christians, here come the lions!"

• UnNews:Falwell starts campaign against God

• UnNews:Irish Duckists rebel

• UnNews:Is Kansas Godless? Or just stupid?

• UnNews:Praying pilot jailed

• UnNews:Westboro Baptist Church protests Uncyclopedia

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Quote of the Week

“If you don't agree with absolutely everything I say that means God hates you and you are going to Hell”

~ Fred Phelps on Everyone.

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Did you know...

• ...that Buddhists have higher cancer rates than Eskimos?
• ...God is pissed off?
• ...that Religion is the longest running joke ever?
• ...that Jews souls are made out of bucky balls?
• ...Glenn Beck cries on television because he's a Mormon?
• ...Zoroaster drives Uhurus Mazda?
• ...Bahais have the best bud?
• ...good Muslims only get 61 virgins after taxes?
• ...Mayan prophesies predicted Quantum Computing?
• ...the Shinto religion encourages rabid badger juggling?
• ...that Jesus Christ really hated sand?
• ...that Buddah became overweight after his dad called him a Commercialist?

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Spiritually Bankrupt Articles

Religion

'Til Eulenspiegel's merry pranks - A.R.C. - Buddhism - Colonialism - Dashboard Confessional - Existence of God - Freedom of speech - Great Commission Ministries - Holy Week - Ignatius of Loyola - Joan of Arc - Kosher - Landover Baptist Church - Miracles - Organised religion - Praise The Lord - Quakerism - Reformed Church of Alfredo - Sith - The Baker - Unquotable:God - Virtue - Walkentology - Xristianity - Yenta -

Zephyr

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Religious Articles That Need Help

Adam - Barbie doll worship - Cyborg Jesus - Doom .0068 - Episcopal Church - Faith - God-Fearing Republicans - Herpes - Intolerance - Jeohovas witness - Kansas Board of Education - Martin Luther King Jr. - Mono - Neo-Confusionism - Original sin - Protestant Reformation - Qu'ran Canker Sore 31 - Ramayana - Samurai Lincoln - Shirley Temple - United Church of Awesome - Veggiestrology - Wikipedianity -

Zucchini