Portal:Religion

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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Religion portal.

By far the holiest portal you will ever find.

Religion is the act of worshipping a creed or deity in which one has mistakenly attributed supernatural powers. 'True Believers' are also known as schizophrenic or having a neurological disorder in scientific, medical, or sane circles. It was invented by tribal leaders at least 2 million years ago in order to control and financially exploit the citizenry and in the Western proper World was still going strong until the separation of Church and State. In the 3rd or improper World it's business as usual. Typically god is portrayed as a giant bearded dragon in the sky that flies around granting wishes, and invoking his wrath. But there are other variations.

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Highlighted Featured Article

HowTo:Be a Jehovah's Witness

Hello son. Yes, you, my boy. I've seen you knocking on the doors of those people. Why is not important. So you say you've been brutally raping anyone who answers, but God forgives. Sodomy and murder are simply stepping-stones to be overcome. Well, I would like to help you with this. I do not know how to ask this of someone who's actually listening, so I suppose I'll just come out and say it. Do you know that the world is due to end soon? We said that the world would end many times, the last time in 1975. We were wrong before but we’re sure we’re right now.

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Highlighted Image

The Messiah, goes to Heaven for three days, to let his Father borrow His glue gun.

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Books and Other Media

UnBooks - UnBooks:God's Guide to Parenting

UnScripts - UnScripts:Genesis, Episode II: In the Garden of Eden

Unfomercials - Unfomercials:Religious Leader Trumps

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Religion in the News

UnNews:Man who claimed to have found God arrested for wasting police time

UnNews:God Sues for Copyright Infringement

UnNews:Ahmadinejad: Holocaust Was Really Big Gay Jew Sex Party

UnNews:Chuck Norris on secularism: the single greatest threat that America has ever faced

UnNews:Papal proclamation to procure profit for prophet

UnNews:Elsuive Duckist killing Sheep release statement

UnNews:Increased sunspot activity cause for concern at Vatican

UnNews:Michael Jackson reassures fans that "Show will go on" despite untimely death.

UnNews:Satanic front group convenes in Vienna

UnNews:Third Coming of Jesus Christ Prophesised!

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Quote of the Week

“You also agree that you will not use these products for any purposes prohibited by United States law, including, without limitation, the development, design, manufacture or production of missiles, or nuclear, chemical or biological weapons.”

~ Apple iTunes EULA Part 10 on stupid policies (Don't believe me? Google it!}}

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