Portal:Religion

Portal:Religion

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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Religion portal. By far the holiest portal you will ever find.

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Religion is the act of worshipping a creed or deity in which one has mistakenly attributed supernatural powers. 'True Believers' are also known as schizophrenic or having a neurological disorder in scientific, medical, or sane circles. It was invented by tribal leaders at least 2 million years ago in order to control and financially exploit the citizenry and in the Western proper World was still going strong until the separation of Church and State. In the 3rd or improper World it's business as usual. Typically god is portrayed as a giant bearded dragon in the sky that flies around granting wishes, and invoking his wrath. But there are other variations.

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Highlighted Featured Article

Zen

Zen is not. Except when it is.

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The Messiah, according to Courtnology. Unlike prophecies, this is based in fact.

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Books and Other Media

UnBooks - UnBooks:The Nearly-Chaste Mormon's Guide to Quitting Masturbation

UnScripts - UnScripts:Genesis, Episode II: In the Garden of Eden

Unfomercials - Unfomercials:Religious Leader Trumps

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Religion in the News

• UnNews:Former Primate of Utrecht Thomas Gibbon resigns in disgrace

• UnNews:David Blaine to die for our Sins

• UnNews:God admits "I experimented with evolution"

• UnNews:Bush expected as Redeemer in the Holy Land

• UnNews:Heaven to be outsourced

• UnNews:Obama's divine powers fading

• UnNews:In space, no one can hear the call to prayerl

• UnNews:Meditating monks accused of sleeping on the job

• UnNews:Prophet strikes, Heaven grinds to halt

• UnNews:Third Coming of Jesus Christ Prophesised!

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Quote of the Week

“That was Zen, this is Tao.”

~ Lao Tzu on The Hydrogen bomb.

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Did you know...

• ...that Buddhists have higher cancer rates than Eskimos?
• ...God is pissed off?
• ...that Religion is the longest running joke ever?
• ...that Jews souls are made out of bucky balls?
• ...Glenn Beck cries on television because he's a Mormon?
• ...Zoroaster drives Uhurus Mazda?
• ...Bahais have the best bud?
• ...good Muslims only get 61 virgins after taxes?
• ...Mayan prophesies predicted Quantum Computing?
• ...the Shinto religion encourages rabid badger juggling?
• ...that Jesus Christ really hated sand?
• ...that Buddah became overweight after his dad called him a Commercialist?

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Spiritually Bankrupt Articles

Religion

'Til Eulenspiegel's merry pranks - Agnosticism - Jamshid Bauerdinedshad - Christianity - Dark Lord - Eggnogsticism - Freedom of Expression - God v. Nietzsche - HowTo:Be a Good Catholic - Is the bear a Catholic? - Jehovah's Witness - Kosher - Linguistic Creationism - Multi religion switching - Ninja-Pirate Assembly of God - Pascal's wager - Quakerism - Rambo - Seventh Day Adventist Church - The Tao of Pooh - Unquotable:God - Virtue - Wheel of Deities - Xristianity - Yad -

Zombie Jesus

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Religious Articles That Need Help

Adam - Bonsai - Colloquialism - Discalced Carmelites - Episcopal Church - Fourth World War - God vs. New York - HowTo:Believe in ALLAH! - Intolerance - Jeohovas witness - Kansas Board of Education - Martin Luther King Jr. - Mono - Neo-Confusionism - Original sin - Passover - Quakers - Rapist - Samurai Lincoln - The gospel according to Jim - U2 - Veggiestrology - Wikipedianity -

Zucchini