Portal:Religion

Portal:Religion

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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Religion portal. By far the holiest portal you will ever find.

Atheism Christianity Indian Islam Judaism God Gods Goddesses Magic Mythology Religious leaders All

Religion is the act of worshipping a creed or deity in which one has mistakenly attributed supernatural powers. 'True Believers' are also known as schizophrenic or having a neurological disorder in scientific, medical, or sane circles. It was invented by tribal leaders at least 2 million years ago in order to control and financially exploit the citizenry and in the Western proper World was still going strong until the separation of Church and State. In the 3rd or improper World it's business as usual. Typically god is portrayed as a giant bearded dragon in the sky that flies around granting wishes, and invoking his wrath. But there are other variations.

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Highlighted Featured Article

UnNews:Poor planning ruins Rapture

EARTH, Sol System -- The Rapture, long awaited by people who don't want to hang around to see how it all turns out, finally occurred this morning, catching even the most militant biblical literalists by surprise. At approximately two o'clock (GMT), various body parts of pious citizens across the globe simply disappeared.

"Yeah, my bad." apologized the archangel Michael at the post-Rapture press conference. "It's a numbers thing, you see. We'd initially planned for 144,000 male Jewish virgins 'plus guest', making for a maximum total of less than 300,000 people, body and soul."

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Highlighted Image

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Books and Other Media

UnBooks - UnBooks:God's Guide to Parenting

UnScripts - UnScripts:Who built the moon

Unfomercials - Unfomercials:Religious Leader Trumps

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Religion in the News

• UnNews:Pope concerned about spherical earth

• UnNews:Pat Boone warns: "Christians, here come the lions!"

• UnNews:Ahmadinejad: Holocaust Was Really Big Gay Jew Sex Party

• UnNews:Police seek prophet in attempted herbicide

• UnNews:Conservapedia demands proof for the existence of science

• UnNews:Obama bows to Saudi king, triggers fall of Western Civilisation

• UnNews:In space, no one can hear the call to prayerl

• UnNews:Man sues God; is smited

• UnNews:Satan arrested in Jerry Falwell death

• UnNews:Vatican decries "Miracle Bra"

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Quote of the Week

“Eh, it's fine, really. No big deal. I'm not offended.”

~ God on Apatheism

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Did you know...

• ...that Buddhists have higher cancer rates than Eskimos?
• ...God is pissed off?
• ...that Religion is the longest running joke ever?
• ...that Jews souls are made out of bucky balls?
• ...Glenn Beck cries on television because he's a Mormon?
• ...Zoroaster drives Uhurus Mazda?
• ...Bahais have the best bud?
• ...good Muslims only get 61 virgins after taxes?
• ...Mayan prophesies predicted Quantum Computing?
• ...the Shinto religion encourages rabid badger juggling?
• ...that Jesus Christ really hated sand?
• ...that Buddah became overweight after his dad called him a Commercialist?

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Spiritually Bankrupt Articles

Religion

'Til Eulenspiegel's merry pranks - Adam and Eve - Bad Religion - CD - Darwinism - Existence of God - Family First Party - Grammatical Pantheon - Hezbollah (Humanitarian Movement) - Intelligent Design By Committee - Jesus Christ - Alcoholic - Karma - Landover Baptist Church - Mosques - Nun accelerator - Patellaology - Qu'ran - Keanu Reeves - Santanism - The History of The World, Condensed Into One Uncyclopedia Article - Unquotable:God - Virtue - Walkentology - Xristianity - YHWH -

Zoroaster

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Religious Articles That Need Help

Atheist Doctrine - Baal - Church of Sony - Discordianism - Exorcism - Fourth World War - God-Fearing Republicans - Holiness - Intolerance - Jesus 2.0 - Kansas Board of Education - Martin Luther King Jr. - Mono - Neo-Confusionism - Original sin - Protestantism - Quakers - Rapist - Santa Claus - The Midnight Sun - United Church of Awesome - Veggiestrology - Wikipedianity -

Zucchini