Undictionary:Europium

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For those obsessed with experts, Uncyclopedia has an article about: Europium.

Europium (Atomic symbol €, uncountable)

(atomic science) A heavy but notoriously unstable element created as part of a mad science experiment at the Large Hadron Collider in the immediate post-World War 2 era. Created in a misguided attept to transmute the elements, this was originally based on a Francium-Germanium collision in which the resulting atom was neutrally observed by CERN Switzerland to have an atomic weight of six. The experiment should have been left at this point; unfortunately, evil scientists continued colliding other atoms (such as Polonium) to produce an element with an atomic weight of 28. Europium's unusually-dense structure is composed mostly of neutrons and inert matter, which are sadly prone to decay into various equally-dense isotopes of Administratium. Europium reacts violently if exposed to Americium. The half-life of this element is short; the 28-proton Europium quickly began to break down by undergoing a process known as Brexit, leaving nothing but fallout and a toxic environment which will take thousands of years to remediate. This unfortunate experiment will therefore never be repeated, for the sake of humanity.

Compounds: Idiotic Table • Canadian Table • Euclid's Elements • Noble gases • Unununium • Unobtanium