Forum:Who do YOU write like?

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Here's a fun little website that, if you copy and paste any article you wrote into it, claims to be able to tell you which famous author's style your writing most resembles.

• BIBLE! - H.P. Lovecraft
• The Wildlife of England's Canals - James Joyce
• Gay Pubs - Douglas Adams

I'm quite pleased about all three of those! Have a go and report back. :-) Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 16:51, July 13, 2010 (UTC)

Should we make individual headers?

Fuck it I'm doing that anyway

• Folsom, California - Stephen King
• Orgasm (Island) - Dan Brown
• Foreplay - Kurt Vonnegut

—fj0j3ddjoaw;rfjaew (r30qjd) 17:00, 13 July 2010 (UTC)

Vonnegut is impressive. Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 17:05, July 13, 2010 (UTC)

i was here

• UnNews:Obama doodles random shit - Chuck Palahniuk
• UnNews:Man Poops on Obama - Kurt Vonnegut
• UnNews:Jesus comes in honor of Good Friday - Stephen King
• typing "dick ass butt poop obama osama bin banana" - P. G. Wodehouse

-

Kingkitty ~Fuck you Brett~ ~Die in a fire Favre~

To be fair, "Dick ass butt poop osama bin banana" is a very detailled analysis of the world today. —fj0j3ddjoaw;rfjaew (r30qjd) 17:39, 13 July 2010 (UTC)

I don't think you're allowed to say "Butt Poop" on Uncyclopedia anymore. pillow talk 17:03, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

sure

• Why?:Brush your teeth with a bottle of Jack? - Margaret Atwood
• Jabulani - Dan Brown
• Jew Beanie - Dan Brown
• Ghetto White Boy Syndrome - Chuck Palahniuk
• Art That Looks Like Nothing - Stephen King
• Parallel Parking - David Foster Wallace

Just some of my favorites that I wrote. ^{Pirate Lord}__Sonic80 (Yell  •  Latest literary excretion) __ 18:07, July 13, 2010 (UTC)

Why not...

• UnBooks:A Day In the Life of Armond White - Vladimir Nabokov

• UnTweets:Odysseus - James Joyce (?????)

Saberwolf116 18:32, July 13, 2010 (UTC)

Maybe you should rename UnTweets:Odysseus UnTweets:Ulysses. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 02:45, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

Because

UnNews:Volcano_victims - H.P. Lovecraft

The doom of binary logic - H.P. Lovecraft

I really do write like him, then.

-- Style  Guide 20:26, July 13, 2010 (UTC)

Yes, because two for two really is definitive... ~ Lyrithya *shifty eyes* (words) (actions) -- 20100718 - 02:49 (UTC)

Heck

• 1860 Oxford evolution debate - Stephen King
• 2 Wizards 1 Cup - Stephen King
• A wizard did it: A Retrospective - J. K. Rowling
• Answer - Stephen King
• Comparative evaluation of the indirect immunoperoxidase test for the serodiagnosis of rickettsial disease - James Joyce
• HowTo:Deal with parents - Stephen King
• In the beginning - Mario Puzo
• It doesn't matter what your answer is as long as you feel good about it - Dan Brown
• Meaning of life - Margaret Atwood
• Nigger Dogshit Sandwiches - Dan Brown
• That time I was nearly raped by a dinosaur during my sojourn in the Mesozoic - Stephen King
• UnNews:Massacre at Brookfield Zoo - George Orwell
• UnNews:Tiger really didn't rape anybody - Rudyard Kipling
• UnNews:Vincent Van Gogh lost ear to grues say German historians - Vladimir Nabokov
• UnPoetia:Little Boy - Charles Dickens

—Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 22:03, 13 July 2010

Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit

• How much can YOU take!! - Ray Bradbury
• Chuggo - James Joyce
• UnBooks:Evelyn, the Modified Dog - H.P. Lovecraft
• Party Hard - George Orwell
• Ekrpat - Stephen King

Huh. -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 22:17, July 13, 2010 (UTC)

me

It says Homosexuality in the British military reads like Dan Brown. Probably because IT'S SHIT. --nachlader 22:51, July 13, 2010 (UTC)

Author! Author!

Says Rolex reads like Shakespeare, People Who Like to Fuck Naked like St. Paul's epistle to the Romans, and Poop throwing monkeys to Ann Coulter. Aleister 22:56 13 7

Obviously

User:Modusoperandi - James Joyce

I have no idea what his stuff is like. Awesome, I assume. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 22:59, July 13, 2010 (UTC)

this is proof that that site needs tearing down --nachlader 23:03, July 13, 2010 (UTC)

Like so...

Minus-ing out the "[Edit]" text and Contents box:

• ABC Gum = Ian Fleming, now you know why my car has missiles, rockets, and NEVER gets caught in traffic.
• Plumage = H. P. Lovecraft, and why the monster under your bed knows how to dance.
• User_talk:Happytimes (a collaborative effort) = Margaret Atwood, and why my/our feminist side is animalistic.
• User:Happytimes/The_Aristocrat's_Turkey_Day_Ball = Mark Twain, and why my Bat Fuck Insane is so prolific.
• That time some prick nearly drowned us all during his sojourn on the Titanic (& That time I nearly drowned during my sojourn on the Titanic) = James Joyce, why I write about everyone I know.
• UnNews:Shiny Balloon Becomes Media Darling = Dan Brown, (There is no cabal.)

 ~ Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!*  (talk) (stalk) Π   ~  ~  14 Jul 2010 ~ 03:03 (UTC) & 14 Jul 2010 ~ 04:10 (UTC)

(Whoring my stuff above this line?)

---

Since I started dropping stuff in to be analyzed I've been trying to figure out how the site is computing its computations...:

• Uncyclopedia Legal Department/Case:Happytimes vs Multiliteralist (as a whole/collaborative) = [Margaret Atwood],

But if I break it down to just my writing I get this:

• Incident x1 here = [Kurt Vonnegut]
• Affidavits x3 here are = [Bram Stoker], [Stephen King], [William Shakespeare]
• Transcript (collaborative) here = [Margaret Atwood]

So I wonder how this site actually judges the writing style??? Keyword? Awesomeness? Errors?

I further wonder if a larger portion of the text determines/overrides the smaller bits? What do you think?  ~ Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!*  (talk) (stalk) Π   ~  ~  14 Jul 2010 ~ 04:44 (UTC)

Completely, randomly generated. -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 06:09, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

Ha! but no, I don't think so.  ~ Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!*  (talk) (stalk) Π   ~  ~  14 Jul 2010 ~ 06:13 (UTC)

I was half tempted to write a data-mining program to generate input and look for patterns in the output, but a quick manual test showed that word order doesn't matter and neither does sentence length. That leaves word frequency. I wouldn't be surprised if they did something super-lazy like Naive Bayes. --monika 09:11, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

Congratulations. You somehow managed to make Uncyclopedia more dorky. Dork. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 09:17, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

I did a slightly more structured test. It's totally only checking word frequency.
"what famous writer you write like" -> Kurt Vonnegut
"write writer like you what famous" -> Kurt Vonnegut
"what famous writer you write like thou" -> James Joyce
"what famous writer you write like thou thou" -> James Joyce
"what famous writer you write like thou thou thou" -> William Shakespeare
"what famous writer you write like what famous writer you write like" -> Kurt Vonnegut
"what famous writer you write like what famous writer you write like thou" -> Kurt Vonnegut
"what famous writer you write like what famous writer you write like thou thou" -> James Joyce
--monika 09:22, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

Interesting to know that monika's comment above is written in the style of Kurt Vonnegut. -- Style  Guide 19:29, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

Of course it is. 'What', 'famous', 'writer', 'you', 'write', and 'like' are the most common words in it. --monika 19:59, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

"What's the frequency, Kenneth?" = "For reliable results paste at least a few paragraphs (not tweets)." = Grr,r,r,r,r,r!!!

What's the frequency, Kenneth? lyrics = Stephen King & not Michael Stipe. I'm beginning to think this whole thing is bullshit.  ~ Avast Matey!!! Happytimes are here!*  (talk) (stalk) Π   ~  ~  15 Jul 2010 ~ 00:47 (UTC)

Hmmmm...

• Metal Gear Solid - Isaac Asimov
• UnBooks:The Lost Introduction to Walden - H.P. Lovecraft
• Ingmar Bergman - Vladimir Nabokov
• Peyton Manning - James Fenimore Cooper
• Barack Obama's Teleprompter - Margaret Atwood
• UnBooks:Insipid Sentimental Women's Novel - Stephen King
• UnBooks:"Incoherent Overwritten Literary Trainwreck" by Thomas Pynchon - ... P. G. Wodehouse?

—Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 02:43, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

Now you know the horrible truth...

Main Page ~ HP Lovecraft Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 08:33, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

These two would really hit it if they met

You see, my bicycle was really down in the docks while I was having several orgasms on the beach, half buried in sand and half submerged in water. My dad was doing all the screwing but then again, he was a mechanic. Why do I even pretend I am an amoeba? Simple: the life of an elephant is far harder. Being a tiger you would have to roar in the jungle and buy presents for my grandfather. - Chuck Palahniuk

You see, my bicycle was really down in the docks while I was having several orgasms on the beach, half buried in sand and half submerged in water. My dad was doing all the screwing but then again, he was a mechanic. - James Joyce

-- Style  Guide 10:46, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

At noon, Wednesday, July 26th, windowpanes in the small mountain towns of Sevier County, Tennessee, were rattled by the shock and faint thunder of a distant explosion rolling down the northwest slopes of the Great Smokies. The explosion came from the general direction of the closely guarded Air Force experimental station in the forest ten miles northwest of Elkmont.

Said the Air Force Office of Public Information, "No comment."

That evening, amateur astronomers in Omaha, Nebraska, and Glenwood, Iowa, reported independently that a speck had crossed the face of the full moon at 9:57 p.m. There was a flurry of excitement on the news wires. Astronomers at the major North American observatories denied that they had seen it.

They lied. -Dan Brown

The trouble is, this is Kurt Vonnegut's text. Sporked without permission from some site, sorry everyone!

-- Style  Guide 10:50, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

Kurt Vonnegut wrote like Dan Brown. Duh. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 11:14, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

I recall

Codeine likening my writing to Martin Amis, of which I was very flattered. I'd like to think I adapt my writing to the specific article I am working on but in reality I just go with the flow, and probably just have "my style". -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

I write like this awesome guy Under user. He's just so cool. --UU - natter 13:29, Jul 14

Programming languages

A friend of mine tried it on a few different different ones:

"HTML is Dan Brown. Python is Isaac Asimov. C++ is Margaret Atwood.

A bunch of random hex dump crap like this...

000ec50: 5d58 6f4b 85e5 73f7 fe70 b0de bd87 f117 ]XoK..s..p...... 000ec60: b3a2 748f 465b ec31 68f1 a4bf ad70 5be3 ..t.F[.1h....p[. 000ec70: bd87 64fa 273c 0728 d979 2109 1991 5146 ..d.

...is HP Lovecraft, which seems quite apt." Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 13:34, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

I also tried the following:

It was 7 minutes after midnight. The dog was lying on the grass in the middle of the lawn in front of Mrs Shears' house. Its eyes were closed. It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife. Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the western spiral of the Galaxy lies a small unregarded yellow sun. When Mr Bilbo Baggins of Bag End announced that he would shortly be celebrating his eleventyifirst birthday with a party of special magnificence, there was much talk and excitement in Hobbiton. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity. I had been making the rounds of the Sacrifice Poles the day we heard my brother had escaped. I already knew something was going to happen; the Factory told me. It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams he found himself transformed in his bed into a gigantic insect. Intelligent life on a planet comes of age when it first works out the reason for its own existence. If superior creatures from space ever visit earth, the first question they will ask, in order to assess the level of our civilization, is: "Have they discovered evolution yet?" "Please, sir, is this Plumfield?" asked a ragged boy of the man who opened the great gate at which the omnibus left him. Of Man's first disobedience, and the fruit/Of that forbidden tree whose mortal taste/Brought death into the World, and all our woe,/With loss of Eden. In my younger and more vulnerable years my father gave me some advice that I've been turning over in my mind ever since. "Whenever you feel like criticizing anyone," he told me, "just remember that all the people in this world haven't had the advantages that you've had." This is the story of what a Woman's patience can endure, and what a Man's resolution can achieve. - which, of course, is a selection of first lines from novels picked at random (I'm sure you all know which ones). The result was Douglas Adams, who did in fact write one of them. Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 13:53, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

This Thing is Really Accurate!

• All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy = Stephen King
• HowTo:Be Enthusiastic Like Jack Black = Jack Black
• UnBooks:Ernest Hemingway's Cookery Corner = Margaret Atwood

Hmmm. Fairly accurate, at least. It's Mrthejazz... a case not yet solved. 14:02, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

My Sojourn

• That time I was nearly raped by a yak during my sojourn in Canada = Stephen King
• That time I accidentally beheaded a queen during my sojourn in France = Stephen King
• That time I was nearly raped by Feyd Rautha Harkonnen during my sojourn in Dune = Stephen King
• That time I was nearly raped by a gay English teacher trying to sell me a free iPod during my sojourn in Canada = Stephen King

Well, at least it's consistent. Stephen King sucks.

• Mr winkler is GAY = James Joyce
• Fisher Price = Margaret Atwood

Hmmmm. pillow talk 17:09, July 14, 2010 (UTC)

Actually, theme-wise the Stephen King ones do fit. O_o ~ Lyrithya *shifty eyes* (words) (actions) -- 20100718 - 02:53 (UTC)

Buh-wah

• HowTo:Get Over Jenny - Margaret Atwood
• Leprechaun - Arthur C. Clarke
• Thin Mints - Harry Harrison
• HowTo:Make a large letter W using Times New Roman font - David Foster Wallace

Hmm. Go figure... Would you like a cookie, sir? 00:07,15July,2010

Interesting note: This is after using excerpts of articles. When using whole copy/pasted articles ([edit] buttons, side notes, format crap, and all), I got DFW for Jenny and Mints as well. Would you like a cookie, sir? 00:22,15July,2010

The articles of Sycamore

...All of my articles are written in the style, quality and sanity of Whitley Strieber and Carlos Castanada.--Sycamore (Talk) 12:20, July 15, 2010 (UTC)

I am lame

Foreign Accent Syndrome=David Foster Wallace ARTICLE IS INCOMPLETE. SECTIONS NOT FINISHED.--M'su Carencro - Talk - Contributions - Blag 05:44, July 15, 2010 (UTC)

Here goes:

An experiment was carried out to find out (Look Around You is a pretty good comedy show, by the way) what stylistic elements from my featured articles resembled those of other famous writers.

Here were the featured articles and their corresponding authors. Write this down in your copybook:

• Cheerios—Stephen King (who knew cereal as prescription drugs could be so frightening?!)
• Sherlock Holmes—Arthur Conan Doyle (well, that's obvious)
• UnScripts:Star Wars (2010)—David Foster Wallace (was it too long?)
• Firefly—ditto (this one probably was too long)
• Pixar—J. K. Rowling (apt, I guess—dark yet Anvilicious works aimed at children)
• UnBooks:An Authentic Journal of Travelers on the Oregon Trail—"Johathan Swift" (Ya know, the West isn't exactly like Brobdingnag)
• UnScripts:Les Misérables, Abrégés—William Shakespeare (It's a play, and almost everyone dies, so I'll take it!)
• The Doctor (using the featured version)—(sigh) Dan Brown (really?! I guess it was a bit bland, but that bland?!)
• 2001: A Space Odyssey—Arthur C. Clarke (ya think?!)

Here are a select few non-featured articles and their corresponding authors. You can copy this in your copybook if you would like.

• iEarth (which was my very first article!)—Douglas Adams (hurrah! Well, it figures, since it's an Apple/H2G2 crossover.)
• Portal (game)—Douglas Adams (Honestly, that's a bit of a surprise.)
• 1944 Summer Olympics—Douglas Adams (Oh well, I'll take it, yay!)
• GLaDOS—Ian Fleming (DOS. GLa DOS.)
• John Hodgman—David Foster Wallace (not John Hodgman?!)
• Heroic Age of Antarctic Exploration—H. P. Lovecraft (I have no idea why.)

So, it's a tie between Douglas Adams and David Foster Wallace!

Got a bit carried away, sorry. As to how the website works, I too think it's purely vocabulary, since including the words "Beeblebrox" and "Megadodo" seemed to drastically increase my chances of sounding like Douglas Adams.

This is the end of the unit. Please hand in your copybook to your teacher or head of class. Next unit, we will be studying what famous movie critics our PeeReviewers sound like. Sir MacMania GUN—[13:02 15 Jul 2010]

Look Around You is coming out on DVD. I hope it includes a workbook. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 13:05, July 15, 2010 (UTC)

I actually was going to use a copybook while watching the first series, but I couldn't quite figure out where the notes on la Boîte Diabolique fit on the five lines, and I gave up. But yes, that would be awesome. Sir MacMania GUN—[13:23 15 Jul 2010]

I write like who?

Sections of articles I wrote:

• from The Sims - Chuck Palahniuk
• from Washington State - Margaret Atwood

Beginning to wonder if its randomly generated.

-- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 02:01, July 18, 2010 (UTC)

Yeah, it seems to be random and includes maybe 10 authors names. I typed in gibberish and got Margaret Atwood too. I wonder why someone went to the trouble of creating the site. Ads? I dunno. Aleister 2;25 18 7

The site reminds me very much of that shirt that says "How do you keep an idiot busy? See other side!" in that its main purpose seems to be keeping idiots busy. -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 02:29, July 18, 2010 (UTC)

Specifically, self-conscious writer-idiots, like me! (I don't think it's entirely random myself, because all of my academic writing gives it the impression that I write like Dan Brown.) Sir MacMania GUN—[03:43 18 Jul 2010]

Cool! A whoring thread!

• Barns and Nobles - Cory Doctorow (naturally, I've never heard of the man before now... he seems more interesting for some reason than he did before I visited this site.)
• Braille - Dan Brown (Ok, I admit it; that's hilarious)
• Do NOT click any links! - Cory Doctorow (uh... I sense a pattern)
• Final Fantasy Football:NFL 07 - Cory Doctorow (yep)
• Fuhrer King Bradley - David Foster Wallace (Apparently, this site thought I was trying to be funny...)
• Rock, Paper, Airstrike - Cory Doctorow (maybe he's a contributor here...)
• UnNews:Astronauts starting to suspect no one is coming for them - Cory Doctorow (wait... maybe I'M Cory Doctorow! Ack! This site is sending me into an existential crisis!)
• Yahoo! - Johnathan Swift (obviously)
• And finally, one of my worser works just to prove it's not just my BEST writing that's like Cory Doctorow Yoko Kanno - H. P Lovecraft (I think that's the one it uses when it's confused)--<<>> 18:48, July 20, 2010 (UTC)