HowTo:Meet women online

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What you are looking for!
What you end up with.
If your end of the cam looks like this, forget it, log off, you ain't getting laid even if you had a $100 note sticking out of your pants!
No, Rasheed. Even that much won't work. Go away.

In the world we live in today, we, the male species, have said goodbye to the need to actually confront the opposite sex face-to-face now that we have the internet. Chat-rooms have become the way to go, and the embarrassment of noticing a female's breasts without the testicular fortitude to tell her verbally to her face that you have been a hunter all your life and never seen a rack like that is solved now that you can simply type it out without her being able to reach through the computer screen and slap you.

However, this also means that you can be as straight forward as you like, and just get down to the hard questions straight off the bat, without having to go through all that bullshit of pretending to give a shit about anything that interests her what-so-ever.

Locating A Cam Whore[edit]

A simple search around the internet looking for your ideal life support to the breast area is a very common thing that a majority of people with access to the internet search for when they get bored of searching for porn, and want to actually interact with someone that they can have total control over, and command to do what they want them to do, instead of having to watch some other guy penetrate a woman from behind, and get irritated that they just wanted to jerk off over the actresses vaginal area being pumped with great force, but instead feeling like a queer when the moment they blew their load, the tasteful erotica on film has cut to a shot of the mans eyes rolling back into his head and moaning. Sure, we have all done that, and felt like a faggot after-wards. Some even have just been horny while watching The View and staring at Sherri Shepherd's luscious mounds of sexual chocolate coated breastness, only to close your eyes during orgasm, point your half & half at the screen, then open your eyes only to find the angle has switched and you have blown your load on Whoopie Goldberg's face instead. Enough to make any man want to amputate his own penis for sure.

Finding a chat-room to meet women is simple. Just follow the smell of over a billion other wankers. If you can find a website where you have noticed their is about 5000 Indian men taking time-out from eating curry to play with their dick on cam, while advertising it in elegant matters such as a sentence that is somewhat written in English, but different to how a hood-rat would rape the English language by spelling everything incorrectly with half the letters missing, then you know you are in the right place.

You may want to check out dating sites, video-chat sites or average sites like Yahoo and what not, but you may also find that a lot of those Google searches for "Free Web-cam Sluts Willing To Be My Own Personal Whore At My Leisure" turn up results for a need to sign up and pay with a credit card just to get a glimpse at the bitches tits. That's where word of mouth and friends recommendations come into play, and not to forget, also it can depend on what your fetish is. Your friends might be able to recommend a site where big breasted ladies like to hang out all day with nothing better to do then reveal their dirty pillows, where as you might want to talk to a woman, who is a little younger, so you may want to check with your local priests about where to locate such a chat-room.

But in the long run, always keep in mind, that if a woman is on cam, it does not matter what the chat rooms topic is, or the site it is connected to is about, no, always remember, a woman is a woman, and a woman is a slut, she is hard up for sex, and is waiting their just to meet you, she has spent her life waiting for you to come and find her, and you alone, to come along and tell her that she is "pretty", and that you would really love to engage in a visual confrontation of those mounds underneath her chin that she has probably never noticed where down there before. So when you find them for her, make sure you compliment her and make her aware that you located those missing tits she may have lost. A simple approach of; "WOW, NICE TITS" or "WHOA MOMMA, I'D LOVE TO TIT FUCK THOSE FUN BAGS", lines such as those are a great way to start, you have shown her you are interested, and sexually attracted to her, and that's about all it should take for her to be putty in your hands.

Using Your Code Words[edit]

Here are a few steps to help you if you struggle to come up with some originality in your first approach to talking to a personal whore-to-be.

  • Step 1 - Locate a chat-room and find a whore. Turn your cam on and don;t sit there naked. Yet.
  • Step 2 - Compliment her. Give her a line like; "Wow, you are pretty". This allows her to know you have found her at long last, and sexually attracted to her. Then use a pick up line to let her know you are single and available.
  • Step 3a - Ask her where she is from? This will determine her location/distance from where you are in the world. If she lives close by, you may be able to interact in a real life get-together for a nice quick bump of the uglies. If she lives a million miles away, you will just settle for her to be your own personal stripping slut on web-cam.
  • Step 3b - It is possible you may not just want a personal cam-whore, but a personal whore to fuck, so you may want to be specific when entering a chat-room and ask something like "Is their any single ladies from xState/xTown who wants to meet a x-Age/M/xLocation with a 12-inch dick? Sometimes this approach goes unanswered, but just give it time and repeat the same thing every 5 minutes. If you are a black man, remember to brag about the size of your dick and how well you eat pussy out. If you are white, inform the ladies it is their lucky day because you just happen to be single. If you are married, NEVER reveal it. It decreases your chance of pussy by 150% percent. Trust us on that. Women fuckin' hate a married man, so deny it all. Also, if a woman happens to live somewhere you may be going to later on down the track, like say, you might be visiting a certain state or area the following month, inform that woman that you will be passing through, and you two should get together for a drink or something while you are there. This allows her to know she will be getting laid on such and such a date, all she has to do is show up and spread her legs for you.
  • Step 4 - You don't want to fuck up your chances with the other women of the chat-room by making them think you are a pervert. So now is a good time to ask them if they have Yahoo or MSN Messenger or maybe even Skype, so that the two of you can go and talk privately, away from public view, just in-case one of those stuck up prudes who actually uses a chat-room to chat to people, starts a female union to liberate all the chicks into believing you are just a sleazy cunt after one thing. Even tho you are just trying to "get off", you don't want them to know that.
  • Step 5 - Accept rejection with dignity, and move onto the next pair of tit's you want to see. Remember to completely ignore talking to the previous woman you asked if she had a messenger service.
  • Step 6 - Keep running through step 4 if repeating step 5 fails continually again.
  • Step 7 - If you have had no success in finding a personal cam-whore to help get you off in private, just stick around, start to now crack onto the women that are not on cam. Ask them if they do have one, or at least a picture of themselves, preferably naked. Maybe she might be interested in taking some private photos to e-mail you.
  • Step 8 - If step 7 has failed. Just wait around in the room for more women to log on. Surely one is bound to show up with some patience.
  • Step 9 - Defend yourself. Sometimes the whores of chat work out you are looking for a personal cam whore, and that liberated bitch we mentioned has formed a union, and suddenly you find yourself with a reply; "STOP ASKING TO SEE TITS/STOP ASKING WOMEN FOR PRIVATE SHOWS ASSHOLE, NO ONE HERE WANTS TO KNOW YOU, YOU PERVERT" or something to that degree, this is where you redeem your reputation and ego by defending it with a reply along the lines of; "FUCK YOU, YOU WHORES, YOU'RE ALL NAZI LESBIANS" then say something dignifying like "YOU COULDN'T HANDLE THIS DICK ANYWAY", then log off. And come back in later under a new user-name or try again in an hour and hope most of the stuck up bitches that where around are no longer logged in. You have successfully told those stuck-up bitches off, and are now back for round 2 without anyone being on your back about being that same pervert from before.
  • Step 10 - Success. You have invited a cam whore to private chat with you!

Successful Pick Up Lines[edit]

The female species can be repelled right away if you do not have a good pick up line. A good pick up line is vital for picking up a cam whore. However you do not want to use a lame line, such as "Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven?" or "Can I see your tits?"... as charming as they where once in the 18th centuray, they just don't work with today's cam whores.

Try some of the following on for size.

  • "It's terrible. My penis just died. Would you mind if I buried it in your ass?"
  • "Hi, babe. Now that I am here, what where your other two wishes?"
  • "Jee, for a fat cunt, you don't sweat very much"
  • "Fuck me if I'm wrong. But is your name Pha-Pha-Dilligaf Rooter Rammer?"
  • "My daddy said it's OK for me to date while he's in jail"
  • "Keep watching. I might do a trick"
  • "I'm a fermata. Hold me"
  • "Can I be your next jealous boyfriend to slash your tires?"
  • "I think you farted. Cause I was just blown away!"
  • "You got that astronaut booty. Cause your ass is out of this world and I want to explore Uranus"
  • "You got those monkey wrench eyes. It means when I look you at them my nut's tighten!"
  • "You know. You aren't nearly as fat as the other guys in here say you are!"
  • "If I flip a coin for you. What do you think my chances are of getting head?"
  • "Wanna see something swell?"
  • "I'm a pirate. And you ARGHHHHHH the sexiest thing I've ever seen. Mind if I search your chest for treasure?
  • "My attraction to you is like diarrhea. I just can't hold it in any longer"
  • "I bet you work at Subway. Because you just have me a foot long!"
  • "I'd like to wrap those legs around my head and wear you as a feedbag!"
  • "Man, I would toke your farts like sucking up a bong hit!"
  • "I was about to masturbate but needed a name to go with the face."
  • "Hey, Baby. I got the F the C and the K. All I need now is U"
  • "Excuse me miss. Do you show your breasts to strangers? No, then let me introduce myself"
  • "I'm betting you work in poultry? No? You should, you've been doing a great job so far of raising cocks!"
  • "Can I touch your bellybutton... from the inside!?"
  • "Roses are red, violets are blue, I like spaghetti, let's fuck"
  • "Do you know what winks and fucks like a tiger? (wink at her)"
  • "You remind me of my grandmother. Except I haven't eaten you out yet!"
  • "I shit my pants, can I get into yours?"
  • "Sure, it may look like a needle. But it moves like a sewing machine!"
  • "Can you beleive they are still together after all that shit? Who? My ass cheeks!"
  • "I have a bay sized dick! 6 pounds, 9 ounces!"
  • "If I was Humpty-Dumpty, and you where Mrs Humpty. I'd push you off the wall just to see your crack!"

So you've scored a cam whore![edit]

When you finally meet a cam whore, and have gotten her to your private lair on Skype or whatever. You must keep in mind that the job is not completed yet. All you have done so far is gotten her attention, and that's most likely all she is looking for right now. Spark up a nice clean conversation first, and ask her about herself, what she does for a living and pretend to give a crap about her hobbies and interests.

Slide in a few smiles and cute looks, and ask her what kind of men she likes? You will now need to interpret for yourself what it is she is into? If she say's she likes shirtless guys, then don't ask her if she would like to see you shirtless, just remove it. She's already agreed to go private talk with you, so she is already interested, so no need to ask. Your own body structure should not matter, as you should have had your own cam on when meeting her, if not, then expect her cam to go blank the moment she see's your ugly ass, because you fucked up on step 1.

Getting her to show off her num-num's now is going to depend on what kind of cam whore she is?

Don't bother using the darkened light trick to make yourself look better and hide your hideous face. That trick hasn't worked on cam whores since 1997
That never works either
  • Slutty Cam Whore - This is the most popular, yet the rarest of cam whores known to exist. She is often a neglected house wife who likes to have fun when her husband is off cheating on her. She is very easy to seduce, in fact, she will probably seduce you first. She usually does all the talking and guides you through what gets her off. However, your luck in finding one of these cam whores is slim. Even more slim is finding one that is even slightly good looking.
  • Tender Cam Whore - This is the innocent one that is shy in a public chat room, however when you get her alone she becomes a sex craved nymphomaniac. It shouldn't take long before she is at your command to cyber fuck with. Try covering the mic or muting it if you feel the urge to laugh when you hear her suppression moans fly saying things like, "Oh yeah, I'm such a bad girl", or "Oh you make me feel so nasty".
  • Tee one time slut - This is a rare case too, but not that rare if you look hard enough to find her. She will be pretty demanding and never show her face on cam. More often than not it's a between the legs dildo show. Be quick with this type, as they tend to be under the age of 17, and only interested in getting themselves off before their little sister or father walks into the room.
  • The lonely heart - This is the cam whore who does not want to be a cam whore, but you will treat her like one anyway. She will be looking for a relationship, so it may take a few days before she shows you anything. Between that time and then, you will have to pretend too to be interested in meeting up some time in the near future. Sweep her off her feet by not only showing her your junk, but telling her things like you want to stick THIS in THAT and so on. This will give her the belief you think she is special. After your first cam to cam hump. It's now your decision if she is worth keeping or not? If you think she is a looker, and wanna do it some more in future, then keep the cam to cam going and go back to pretending to give a shit about her. If not, close the cam down and say thanks bitch, and delete her from your cam operating device software. How long you want to string her along before telling her you are not interested anymore is completely up to you. You can do it the hard way, and tell her it's not her, it's you, you just can't do this with what's going on in your life at the moment, or you can easily just tell her she doesn't do it for you anymore.
  • The lonely heart prude - This is the cam whore to avoid at all costs. She is much like the previous "Lonely Heart", only this one will not show a damn thing. If after 7 days she will not give in and show her birthday suit, then forget it. Your only chance of seeing her naked is to actually meet up, defeating the purpose of wanting a strict cam whore with no strings attached. Again, the decision is yours, but keep in mind, there may be a reason this cock teaser is not showing herself on cam.
  • The Guy Cam Whore - This is quite common where you think you are seeing a woman. However you must look carefully for looping footage. As often enough it's really a guy on the other end who would not be able to see your junk by simply asking. If you happen to be heterosexually challenged, you may enjoy it. If not, look out for the signs.
  • The self obsessed Cam Whore - This one is quite common, and nothing special. She is the one who simply enjoys attention, or is obsessed with taking selfies. This particular cam whore knows she is good looking, or again, can't get enough attention to fill in the void due to personal reasons caused by her father. Often they have enormous breasts, but an elite group of followers. Sometimes she might just be a SSBBW who has lost enough weight to call herself a BBW now, and enjoys having the cam high above her head, so when she looks up into the camera, her double to triple chins are not showing. This type of attention seeking cam whore may show her goods, however, it's mostly just sitting there naked, which does become deemed as unworthy to jack off to. You may notice her smile or laugh, like it was a reaction to someone else saying something to her, which is the dead give away that you are not the only one viewing her supposed "private" show. Do not try to get closer to this type of cam whore. It is not worth it to view the breasticles or minge of a woman who soon enough will become a born again christian and cuss at any other woman showing herself off in chat rooms, calling them whores with no self respect.

Don't Get Caught Out[edit]


What you don't want to forget about is that these cam whores usually run in packs. Tho they may not reveal their cam whore side to others, they often are found in the same chat-rooms constantly, some practically living there. They run in small cliques so make sure not to go hitting on one of her friends, or your cam whore may cut herself off from you. Take some of the following tips to avoid this from occurring.

  • Avoid using the same chatroom all the time to find yourself a cam-ho
  • Change your username every time you log in, as to go undetected from the trolls who reside in the rooms.
  • Only ask your intimate and sexually oriented questions once the cam whore is in private.
  • Don't ask the cam whore to show in the room at all, not even as a private message, as they tend to blab it to the rest of the room anyway, fucking up any chance of you seeing some cam bush now!
  • Don't let your embarrassment of rejection get the better of you. If any other cam whores see you calling someone a slut, tight-ass, or prude for not showing, they always jump on the bandwagon and treat you like you are scum
  • Don't offer anything under $100 for a lady to show reveal what she is showing. Remember, wants to feel special, and you can get a proper hand job from a hooker for $60 or a deep throat and clean suck swallow for $90. A cam whore believes she is above a hooker, so start at no less than $100.
  • Shave your balls and clean your taint thoughtfully.
    • If you don't think you are a good looking white guy, then simply dim the lights in your room and adjust the gamma and resolution of your webcam. This can give the impression that you are a black guy, and white girls love black guys!
    • If you are a black man with the lights dim, lighten up the place and hide your paraphernalia and firearms from sight. No one likes a hood rat.
    • If you are an Asian guy, avoid typing or talking in broken English, girls say they like a man with a sense of humor, but they are full of shit. Also try to find a camera effect that magnifies small objects.
    • If you are an Indian man, turn your cam off, you have no chance in hell of getting off on cam with a woman who has already seen you a million times already in the Yahoo lobby chat rooms.

In Conclusion[edit]

This guide should have helped you succeed in finding your very own cam whore. How you use these tips and tricks is up to you. You have now become a Jedi Master of the Masturbating Jedi group, however, do expect to fail. For do or do not, there is no guarantee that you will be successful all the time. But keep at it. Patience is the key. It may take you several days, weeks or months to find your cam whore, but when you do, remember to record her cam to video, so that you have something to whack off to in between your next find. Especially if you fucked up with a cam whore before you where done with her.

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