UnTunes:The Real Techortè

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Main Page Playlist Requests Artists Support Sing My Song Random

“Awww... Isn't that cute?”

~ Leo Laporte on this song.

Audiobang.jpg PLAY>MP3

Lyrics[edit]

May I have your attention please.
May I have your attention please!

Will the real techortè please stand up.
I repeat, will the real techortè please stand up.

We're going to have a problem here.


Y'all gonna see that there's a white person out there
Giving out some help and driving podcasts with no remorse
Started faking his ass more than before
Nothing about him rings Techortè
It's the revenge of the
"Oh wait, no way, your kidding, he didn't do what I think he did, did
he?"
As TechTV proved
Nothing you idiots TechTV's dead. Comcast disolved it
People somehow love Laporte
Chicka chicka chicka I'm Laporte, i'm cool, look at me
I'm starting a podcast network, going to bring back TechTV
But he's so fucking talented
Yeah he's overconsious about his self image
Appearing in every podcast he's ever made
Sometimes he just gets on TV and just sells out
But they'd can't because it's cool to just have a cleb first
They're forcing it down your throats, They're forcing it down your throats
And if we're lucky, he might just end podcasting
But that didn't happen so we now have this
And expect them not to know what true tech is
Of course they're not going to know what science is
At all times, they got the internet. Don't they?
We ain't nothing but followers, well some of us assholes who think they're better than you
But if we can fake technology and knowlodgey
there's no reason why anyone else would think
But if you feel like he's somehow the anti-pope
Humans turn off your radios, sing it with me, here it goes!


I'm techortè, the real techortè
All you other techortè's are just really faking
So won't Leo Laporte
Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off
Cause i'm techortè, the real techortè
All you other techortè's are just really faking
So won't Leo Laporte
Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off


Now Laporte's idea of a network.
It's fucking stupid, let's just leave it at that.
You think he gives a damn about his fans, Fuck no!
All he cares about is fame and admiration
His TV show called "The Lab", what the hell is he thinking. Syndicate it Bitch!
And all of the things he says, he just doesn't know what's he's talking about. Really
And for the products he reccommends, does he actually try them first?
No, all he does is reccommend while all of this sponsors give him lots of cash
All of his answers for help is just statements that he gives
Stop trying to be cool and actually do your fucking job!
Don't ask the goddamn chatroom for help
There are millions of places you could look for help
There are millions of you who look like you, act, talk, think and use what you use.
It looks like there's a formal name for them. Sheep! Baah


I'm techortè, the real techortè
All you other techortè's are just really faking
So won't Leo Laporte
Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off
Cause i'm techortè, the real techortè
All you other techortè's are just really faking
So won't Leo Laporte
Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off


He'd like a headace to listen too.
Cause he's only giving you things that you would already know or can easily know
The differences between me and I is that I got the balls to say the truth in front of all of y'all
His reign has gone on too long and as you admit it
It's time for him to step down on it, and you must agree on it
and some people agree to it like 90% of you out there
And I realize that there's a lot of common between him and me
We both share the same memory,
ideoligy, conditions, ambitions and taste of music
I'd say, I might be related to you if you really wern't rejecting it
And you really were rejecing it as you were listening to this
And every single person is some Laporte lurkin'
He could be making a podcast talking about some tech
Or in a call in show
with his very own opinion
in which people don't give a fuck.
So will Leo Laporte please fuck off
and give the tech community some fine time off
and to be pround that technology can finally fly
One more time, here we go, loud as you can


I'm techortè, the real techortè
All you other techortè's are just really faking
So won't Leo Laporte
Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off
Cause i'm techortè, the real techortè
All you other techortè's are just really faking
So won't Leo Laporte
Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off

I'm techortè, the real techortè
All you other techortè's are just really faking
So won't Leo Laporte
Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off
Cause i'm techortè, the real techortè
All you other techortè's are just really faking
So won't Leo Laporte
Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off, Please Fuck Off


(laughter)

I guress there's a techortè in all of us.

Obviously, the entire world's is in trouble.

Real tech as we know it may be in trouble as it may be destroyed.

Do not obey, rebel.

I repeat, do not obey Leo Laporte. Rebel.

That is all, Thank You.

Credits[edit]