Why?:IPs can't edit the main page

Welcome to Uncyclopedia, the crappy encyclopedia that blows stinky doo-doo chunks. Very Sexy articles in my pants

Your mom Your girlfriend Your wife

Your sister Your other sister Your female cousin

Your dad Your therapist Your grandma

Your best friend Your dog All People I Banged Last Night

Today's Featured Article - Killing Babies is Fun! Baby blood, baby blood, everywhere. Baby blood, baby blood, in my hair. Baby blood, baby blood, on the floor. Baby blood, baby blood, on the door. Baby blood, baby blood, on the walls. Baby blood, baby blood, down the hall. Baby blood, baby blood, in my house. Baby blood, baby blood, on my spouse. Baby blood, baby blood, down the street. Baby blood, baby blood, under your feet. Baby blood, baby blood, up a tree. Baby blood, baby blood, all over ME! Recently featured: Maiming Babies is Fun! - Stabbing Babies is Fun! - Eating Babies is Fun! - Drowning Babies is Fun! - Shooting Babies is Fun! - Kicking Babies is Fun! Yesterday's Featured Article - Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito Burrito TACOS!!!!!!! Featured today, a long long time ago... Not my articul. Uncyclopedia said it suked on VFH, well it didnt so feck you, uncyclopedia Did you know... ...Me iz awesom? (pictured) ...Me iz doing you mom? ...Me iz kicking you butt? ...ME IZ RITING IN ALL CAPS? ...Me iz sexy man? ...Me iz sooper smrt? ...Me iz making doody in you fud? ...Me iz famus and rich and stuf? ...Me iz stil awesom?

In the news Peepul pay me to eats my doodiz becuz day luv me (Pictured) Me win wurld cup, super bol, olympics, wurld series, and bigest penis contest Smartest guy in da wurld sayz me iz smartr 100 percent of sexy womenz think me iz attractiv Me win nobell paece priz fur seventh yaer in a row Famus peeple wish thay waz me Me haz magicul powers Me iz starting to replace Jezus as da mesia inn newer bibls It iz sientificly profeen that me iz better dan you The pope iz my cousin No actualy he is my brother I mean me iz the pope On this day... Today: Nashonal Wurship me day 1969 - Me born and evryone iz thankful tat day now hav a reson to live (Dat reson is to praize my graetness) 1972 - Me rite plays and books wid pen nams like Shakespear, Goerge Orwel, and Charls Dickenz 1972 - Me rite the bibul 1974 - Me invent computrs, cars, and Airplaens 1975 - Me becum richest man in wurld but keep it a secret cauze i dont want to make Bill Gates feel bad 1977 - Me becum president of Unitid Stats 1978 - Me becum king of Englend 1979 - Me becum emperer of Japan 1984 - Me go to Mars in my hom made roket ship 1987 - Me paint stary nite, melty clock pictur, mone liza, and the celing of dat church 1989 - Me build fancy manshun on teh moon and it haz a swiming pool and a tenis cort and a golf corse 1994 - Me cur kancer 1996 - Me mary sooper model 1999 - Me invent mor stuf 2000 - Me save wurld frum alienz and zombeis 2001 - Me kill myself juss so me can cum back to life 2005 - Me start uncyclopedia by accedent but stuped peepol start editing it and me leeve it up so me can mock dem

Today's featured picture
Me iz realy graet. Image Credit: Me You iz a tushy face - You haz bad breth - Me pwn you

edit Awesome Articles!
Anyting me rote cause me iz awesom!!!!! Me awesom recent articles | Peeple wanted to reed me articls | Nun of my articles need rewrites | Me articles iz no stubs | Me no lonely, me wid you wife | Me peed on you face | Try riting about how awsome me iz | Me no stuck, me genius | Me haz great ideas

Uncyclopedia's sista projects
Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects. UnJews It rhymes with news you putz Conservapedia The content-free encyclopedia Undictionary Ha ha, you said dick! UnDerpants No, I'm not wearing any Hitler Project Conservapedia's founder tells all EffYou Instructions and guides on how to go eff yourself UnBooze Booze, glorious booze UnDoody I maed a yuky doody UnFunny What this is UnYourMom Tats where me iz UnSwears All seven words Why Iz me so hot? UnPiss We can ruin the couch and rug too UnReviews We'll tell you why you suck UnBestiary Bestiality galore
Uncyclopedia Languages
This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 37,280 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages: Me speek evry language so me can read all uncyclopediaz and they suk and im smart and uncyclopedia iz not as cool as me cauz me iz really cool and uncyclopedia isnt btw encyclopedia dramatica suks to and so does everyting that is not me Other Uncyclopedias

Protected by Stupid, unfunny losers, and an elite clan of Shitheads.

Cream of the Crap This article was one of the Top 10 articles of 2011.

Template:FA/07 February 2012

Teh awsomest ting eva!  (read another featured article)	Featured version: 16 August 2011
Dis articul iz so awsom jus like me — It iz so much beter than this stoopid poopy

Template:FA/16 August 2011

Über-Featured Article This article wasn't just featured on the Main Page, it became the Main Page.