Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/March 2

March 2: International Kill a Cartoon Character Day

• 40 million BCE - Heaven is created after God gets drunk and accidentally kills Tony the Tiger and needs a place to hide the body.
• 1901 - Heaven is finally accepted as a member of the United Nations, just a shade over 40 million years after Tony the Tiger's death.
• 1902 - Nietzsche kills the Trix Rabbit over the latter's Überwabbit philosophical theories.
• 1912 - Chip and Dale get killed in fiery auto accident with Donald Duck and a turkey. Turducken is then invented when the group is found to taste "just like chicken".
• 1962 - Barbara Walters begins murdering the Rice Crispy boys one by one by breaking their necks with a satisfying *snap*, *crackle* and *pop*.
• 1967 - To the relief of Tokyoites, Godzilla just comes as far as Zushi Beach to enjoy a sunny day. He builds an immense sandcastle, plays in the surf, then returns to the ocean at sunset. Later, winds would blow the sand into Tokyo, destroying it.
• 1973 - Bob the Builder is killed by Patrick Stewart in freak dodgeball accident.
• 1978 - The Roadrunner pushes Wile E. Coyote off a cliff.
• 1984 - Gorby names March 2 the "Saddest day ever".
• 1985 - New Kids on the Block kill Fat Albert, proving they have some kind of talent after all.
• 1992 - A giant Kryptonian beast kills Superman, just before having a couple tall buildings for dessert.
• 1994 - This is the day that I kill Kenny. (You bastard!)
• 1996 - Sylvester Stallone kills Sylvester the Cat for name rights.
• 1999 - Disney cartoon characters are murdered by more favored anime fans.
• 2001 - President Bush's "War on Spongebob" begins with the carpet bombing of Bikini Bottom. This is just another example of one cartoon character trying to kill another.
• 2008 - Popeye dies after being poisoned by Salmonella bacteria in spinach.
• 2010 - Sam I Am chokes on his Green Eggs and Ham. He is a poet but don't know it.
• 2012 - Itchy and Scratchy kill Tom and Jerry.