Axis and Allies (video game)

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“ I do believe that this isn't a video game based on historical events, it's a video game based on a video game based on historical events, anything can happen. This has nothing to do with the developer flunking History at highschool. NOTHING.”

~ Oscar Wilde on Axis and Allies (video game)

The Game Begins[edit]

*Adolfinator7 has entered the game*

*GB_Un1t has entered the game*

*Stalinoscopy has returned from idol*

*N1h()n has entered the game*

*Ameriland209 has returned from idol*

*Game starting in 10 seconds*



GB_Un1t: U gonna go or wat!?

Stalinoscopy: God damn it I was thinking.

*Stalinoscopy has attacked Adolfinator7*

*Adolfinator7 has taken 32 damage*

*Stalinoscopy has taken 7 damage*

Adolfinator7: Dude, WTF?

Ameriland209: OWNED!

N1h()n: Turn off the Hax gay.

Stalinoscopy: I don't hack, I just got lucky.

Adolfiinator7: Yeah sure, w/e.

*Stalinoscopy has captured West Russia*

*Stalinoscopy has captured West Ukraine*

*Stalinoscopy has captured West Belorussia*

Adolfinator7: Damz...

Adolfinator7: I'm buying a fighter and 6 tank divisions.

Stalinoscopy: Fuck! I forgot to buy shit!

N1h()n: You're screwed.

Ameriland209: I got your back dude.

*Adolfinator7 has attacked Stalinoscopy*

*Stalinoscopy has taken 25 damage*

Adolfinator7: I R the 1337.

Stalinoscopy: Only on the count of villany.

GB_Un1t: WTF?

*Adolfinator7 has attacked Stalinoscopy*

*Stalinoscopy has taken 17 damage*

*Adolfinator7 has taken 3 damage*

Stalinoscopy: Dude, WTH, leave me alone.

Adolfinator7: STFU NUBE!

Ameriland209: Lol.

*Adolfinator7 has captured Belorussia*

*Adolfinator7 has captured Karelia S.S.R.*

*Adolfinator7 has captured Kazakh S.S.R.*

Stalinoscopy: Oh sweet Jesus.

GB_Un1t: I'm going to buy some shit.

GB_Un1t: Umm....

GB_Un1t: Alright, let's go!


Ameriland209: ?!

*GB_Un1t has attacked Adolfinator7*

*Adolfinator7 has taken -2 damage*

*GB_Un1t Loses RAF*

Stalinoscopy: God damn it GB_Un1t, god damn it.

Ameriland209: GB_Un1t why do you do this shit?

Ameriland209: You are just dumb as shit.

GB_Un1t: Well, At least I have Tanks.

*Luftwaffe bombs GB_un1ts Factories*

*GB_Un1t Loses Tanks*

GB_Un1t: Oh shyt.

N1h()n: Lol, can you say PWND'D?

GB_Un1t: Well, I'm done.

Adolfinator7: You're right about that. Rofl.

N1h()n: You guys can go fuck yourselves, I'm not saying what I'm buying.

GB_Un1t: Like we care assclown, just take your turn.

Adolfinator7: Yeah you yellow bastard.


N1h()n: You fags are ghey.

*N1h()n has attacked Ameriland209*

*Ameriland209 has taken 3 damage*

Stalinoscopy: Dude, you can't fight a war with chopsticks.

N1h()n: Don't B jealous of my chopsticks BITCH.

*Spain_man23 has entered the game*

Spain_man23: I'M RICK JAMES BITCH!!!

Adolfinator7: Who the flying fuck invited you?

Spain_man23: Your Mother.

GB_Un1t: Spain's neutral, you can't play.

Spain_man23: Damn, fine I'm leaving.

*Spain_man23 has left the room*

*N1h()n has attacked Ameriland209*

*Ameriland209 has taken 31 damage*


Ameriland209: Pshh, that was nothing Ch00b.

Ameriland209: I'm buying 9 tank divisions.

N1h()n: Oh, I'm trembling!!!

Ameriland209: You really are just like your mother...

N1h()n: WTF dude?

*Ameriland209 has attacked N1h()n*

*N1h()n* has taken 21 damage*

*N1h()n* has taken 18 damage*

*N1h()n* has taken 15 damage*

*N1h()n* has taken 10 damage*

*Ameriland209 has taken 17 damage*

N1h()n: Holy shit, are you serious!? Nogodamnway.

Ameriland209: Taste my wrath Nazi Pigs.

Adolfinator7: Not cool...

*Ameriland207 has attacked Adolfinator7*

*Adolfiinator7 has taken -3 damage*

Ameriland209: w00t?!?!

Adolfinator7: Uhh... why does your "wrath" taste like strawberries?

Ameriland209: Shut up.

Adolfinator7: I guess you're not as easy as N1h()n.

GB_Un1t: Lol.

N1h()n: At least i'm not as easy as your mom.

Ameriland209: Woah, easy Little Boy, now you've insulted the Fat Man.

GB_Un1t: LOL XD, Fat americans!!

N1h()n: Wait wait wait, who the hell won the first round?

Stalinoscopy: That's not how this game works idiot.


Stalinoscopy: This time, I AM buying something

Adolfinator7: It's not going to help, unless you're buying an 1337 BOMBZ.

Stalinoscopy: You know damn well I can't get one of those until Round 4.

*Stalinoscopy has attacked Germinator7*

*Adolfinator7 has taken 12 damage*

GB_Un1t: Dude, we'll never win if you don't buy any guns or shoes for your soldiers.

Stalinoscopy: We'll never win if you destroy your whole army on the first turn you bitch.

Stalinoscopy: Besides, that is what I bought....

GB_Un1t: Oh...

*Stalinoscopy's submarine has sneak-attacked Germinator7's Transport*

*Adolfinator7's transport has been destroyed*

Adolfinator7: I smell a cheat, when'd you getta sub?

Stalinoscopy: I like started with it and stuff...

*Ameriland209 has Invaded Normandy*

*Ameriland209 has captured Cherbourg*

*Ameriland209 has captured Caen*

*Ameriland209 has captured Havre*

*Stalinoscopy has attacked Adolfinator7*

*Adolfinator7 has taken 50 damage CRITICAL HIT

Adolfinator7: WTF, U HAXIN'!?111?!

*Franc3 has entered the game*

Adolfinator7: WTF, Franc3!? i kicked ur azz ages ago!

Franc3: STFU Gheylord, Take this!!

*Franc3 has attacked Adolfinator7*

*Adolfinator7 has taken -1 damage

GB_Un1t: Wow Franc3. U Suck

Adolfinator7: Yeah.

Adolfinator7: And where the h3ll is Benny?!

*Macaroni_Benny is no longer idle*

Macaroni_Benny: Im bak!

*Fartysans has Killed Macaroni_Benny*

Adolfinator7: WTF!1!?1?

Fartysans: lololol, j00 art pwned adolf! we're on allies side now! noob!

Adolfinator7: Ow fuck, this suxx

Adolfinator7: Well, You macaronis we're just like franc3

Franc3: STFU adolf, ure l0sing u ghey!

GB_Un1t: STFU, Franc3

*Stalinoscopy has captured Poland*

Adolfinator7: LOL, U lozer! we're still winning. you subhumans! SUBMIT!

Stalinoscopy: Shut up! we're at the gates b3rlin

Adolfinator7: That means nothing.

*Adolfinator7 has attacked Stalinoscopy*

*Stalinoscopy has taken 9 damage*

*Adolfinator7 Actives Übersoldat hack

Stalinoscopy: Wtf?? Admin kick tht neb!!

Franc3: hacker!11!

*Adolfinator7 uses Übersoldet on Stalinoscopy*

*Stalinoscopy has taken 29 damage*

Adolfinator7: Wheee ^^

*Adolfinator7 uses Übersoldat on Stalinoscopy*

*Stalinoscopy has taken 22 damage*

*Adolfinator7 uses Übersoldat on Stalinoscopy*

*Stalinoscopy has taken 19 damage*

Stalinoscopy: LOL U HOMO STOP HACKING!1!

Ameriland209: LoL, Stop haxin adolf!

Adolfinator7: Noway u neeeebs!

Adolfinator7: Heeey! what happened :(

*Übersoldats batteries are now empty*

Stalinoscopy: Haha, now i make my move.

*Stalinoscopy captures Übersoldats*

Ameriland209: Remeber to destroy those 333vil thigs Stalino!

Stalinoscopy: Yeah thats what im going to do...

*Stalinoscopy has attacked Adolfinator7*

*Adolfinator7 has taken 49 damage*

Stalinoscopy: FUCKIN DIEE!

Adolfinator7: NO YOU

*Ameriland209 is crossing Rhine*


*Ameriland209 has taken 66 damage, CRITICAL HIT*

Ameriland209: FFS this srvr is so fcking unrealistic!

Franc3: I'll help you out from this Ameriland!

Ameriland209: I bet...

*Franc3 has attacked Adolfinator7*

*Adolfinator7 has taken -32 damage*

*Franc3 has killed Franc3*

Ameriland209: LOL Franc3..

Stalinoscopy: Wut a suprise.

GB_Un1t: This is taking 4ever.

*GB_Un1t sends bombers to Berlin*

*Bombers collide with Big Ben*

*GB_un1t has taken 32 damage*

GB_Un1t: WTF is wrong with this!?!

Stalinoscopy: Adolf and his hax. they are what is wrong with this.

N1h()n: Take this u nub!

*N1h()n has attacked Ameriland209*

*Ameriland209 has taken 12 damage*

Ameriland209: U r still here?

*Ameriland209 uses A-bombs to N1h()n*

*N1h()n has taken 1200 damage*

*Ameriland209 has Killed N1h()n*

GB_Un1t: LOL!! Use a-bombs to adolf!

Ameriland209: Sry, i dont hav more a-bombs.

GB_Un1t: Noooo!1! you dumbfuck!!!

*Admin has left the server*

*Adolfinator7 now has Adminstrator privileges*

Ameriland209: WTF?!!

Stalinoscopy: OMG!

*Franc3 has spawned*

GB_Un1t: WTF? Franc3 ure bak again!?!1

Franc3: Yeah, i spawned back.

*Adolfinator7 has locked the server*

*Adolfinator7 is now immortal*

Adolfinator7: Haha, ure now trpped on this srvr!

Ameriland209: Yeah right.

*Ameriland209 Tries to leave Server*

*Unable to leave server*

Adolfinator7: See? also, u cannot turn off your computer or even leave your own room ^^

Adolfinator7: This is gr8 mod

Franc3: Reminds me about Counter-Strike

Ameriland209: LOL. Lets gear up and kick adolf's ass!

*Ameriland209 Builds A-Bomb*

*Admin Detonates Ameriland's A-bombs*

*Ameriland209 has taken 500 damage, CRITICAL HIT*

Ameriland209: OMGLOLWTF??? You stupid cunt

*Adolfinator7 slaps Ameriland209*

*Ameriland209 has taken 50 damage*

Adolfinator7: Dont mess with Admin :D

Ameriland209: OH IM SO SORRY..u ghey..

Franc3: Im on Adolf's side now!

Adolfinator7: No u r not.

*Adolfinator7 has attacked Franc3*

*Franc3 has taken 55 damage, CRITICAL HIT*

*Adolfinator7 killed Franc3*

Stalinoscopy: OMG. franc3 has died 3 times now.

Franc3(Dead): WTF, im Spectator!

Ameriland209: this is gonna take loooong.

*25 years later...*

*Adolfinator7 killed Franc3*

Franc3(Dead): OH plz Adolf let me out!

Franc3(Dead): This is just like in CS =(

Stalinoscopy: Graz Franc3. You have died 10 000 times now!

*Franc3 has spawned*

Franc3: FUCK J00 STALIN!

*Stalinoscopy has attacked Franc3*

*Franc3 has taken 63 damage*

*Stalinoscopy killed Franc3*

Franc3(Dead): HEY! Why u all keep killing me!?

Stalinoscopy: Coz u sux.

Ameriland209: THATS IT

Ameriland209: aasddafasf

Ameriland209: ssadafasf

Ameriland209: efwERWEf

Ameriland209: 11

Ameriland209: 1111

Ameriland209: 1

*Adolfinator7 has attacked Ameriland209*

*Ameriland209 has taken 500 damage*

*Adolfinator7 killed Ameriland209*

Adolfinator7: Heeeh. This is gettin boring, im out c ya all later!

*Adolfinator7 has left the server*

*Franc3 tries to leave Server*

*Unable to leave Server*

Franc3: OMG we're trapped here!

*Ameriland209 has left the server*

*Stalinoscopy has left the server*

*GB_Un1t has left the server*

Franc3: WTF?!?!

*Franc3 tries to leave Server*

*Unable to leave Server*

*Franc3 tries to leave Server*

*Unable to leave Server*

Franc3: OMG!?? ANYONE HERE!?!? HELP!!??

Franc3: jeez. im trapped here for eternity.

Peer: No ure not

Franc3: WTF?!?! Who are you?

Peer: Edward Peer, The guy who resets connections!

Franc3: Will you help me out from here?

Peer: No.

*Peer has attacked Franc3*

*Franc3 has taken 1000 damage*

*Peer killed Franc3*

Franc3(Dead) : Oh great.

*Peer has left the server (Connection Reseted By Peer)*

*Andorra has entered the game*

Andorra: Yo. Peace Franc3? im still noob and i dont know how to play.


*Franc3 has attacked Andorra*

*Andorra has taken 0 damage*


*Andorra has attacked Franc3*

*Franc3 has taken 23 damage*

*Andorra killed Franc3*

Andorra : KTHXBYE

*Andorra has left the server (Franc3 Sux)*

Franc3 : This would be better if i still had napoleon... F***ing wellington he sure know how to ruin a party.

*Years pass...*

*More years pass...*

*Few more years pass...*

*Ameriland209 has Joined the server*

*Stalinoscopy has Joined the server*

*GB_Un1t has Joined the server*

Franc3 : Hey u guys are back!

Stalinoscopy  : LOL Franc3 u been here like 56 years?

*Adolfinator7 has joined the server*

Adolfinator7: LOL, Sup d00ds.

Stalinoscopy  : Hey u haxing fvck


*Adolfinator7 has attacked Franc3*

*Franc3 has taken 1000 damage, CRITICAL HIT*

*Adolfinator7 killed Franc3*

Franc3 : why this keeps happenin to meh??

*Admin has Joined the server*

*Adolfinator7 Has No More Adminstrator privileges*

Adolfinator7: awwww :(

*Admin turns gravity off*

Ameriland209: WTF??? gravity??

Admin: Oops, wrong game.

Franc3 : Ok...Wuts the date laik today?

Adolfinator7: 12.5.2036

Stalinoscopy  : Heyy!! time 4 WW3!

Franc3 : Does this mean...

*Stalinoscopy has taken over europe*

Franc3 : ...That someone will kill me again.