UnNews:Exclusive: Is the 2008 movie "Soul Men" cursed after Mac, Hayes deaths?

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Truth doesn't "live here" — It's just camping out UnNews Sunday, May 26, 2024, 01:56:59 (UTC)

Exclusive: Is the 2008 movie "Soul Men" cursed after Mac, Hayes deaths? UnNews Logo Potato.png

18 August 2008

HOLLYWOOD, California -- After the shocking, tragic, and untimely deaths of Bernie Mac and Isaac Hayes within a day of each other, many experts believe that the upcoming movie, Soul Men, in which the two appear, is cursed.

Why so serious?

World-reknowned psychic Sylvia Browne believes that the movie is cursed. She said in a recent interview:

Oh yeah. It's very cursed. And you thought there was a dark cloud looming over The Dark Knight what with the death of a stuntman, the death of Heath Ledger, and the car crash that nearly killed Morgan Freeman. Soul Men director Malcolm D. Lee was very much aware of the fact that he needed a bunch of bizarre and/or tragic coincidences if he ever wanted this film to succeed in the way that The Dark Knight has. But he didn't predict that things would get this tragic. In fact, they're trying to get co-star Samuel L. Jackson to a safe place to prevent further tragedy. His spirit guide's name is Rick; he's a pretty nice guy.

The movie stars Mac as Floyd and Jackson as Louis, two soul-singing legends who had a falling out twenty years ago and haven't spoken a word to each other since. They plan to reunite their group to honor their recently-deceased lead singer. The recently-deceased Hayes plays himself, ironically still alive.

The late Bernie Mac.

Other experts, such as Dr. Phil call the curse rumors, "Absolute bullshit!"

It is so typical of Americans to jump on something so insanely idiotic that it's not even funny. You all need mental help. This movie isn't cursed, The Dark Knight isn't cursed, no movie is cursed. But Seinfeld is cursed; just look at Jason Alexander's career: Bob Patterson was a terrible sitcom.

Bernie Mac was born 'Bernard Jeffrey McCullough on October 5, 1957. He was a very famous standup comedian and founding Original King of Comedy. He got his own Fox sitcom that aired from 2001 to 2006. He played himself, as did the rest of the cast, in the Ocean's Eleven, Twelve, and Thirteen films and played Bosley in Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle when Bill Murray refused to return. He played Optimus Prime, Jazz, Bumblebee, and Megatron in Michael Bay's 2007 Transformers movie starring Shia Labeouf. Mac suffered from sarcoidosis, and was hospitalized with pneumonia. He died on August 9, 2008 at age 50.

Isaac Hayes was born back in the 1970s. He sang the theme song to the movie, Shaft, for which we won a Grammy and an Oscar. He went on to acting, appearing in John Carpenter's Escape From New York, and voicing Chef on TV's South Park. He died August 10, 2008 at the age of 65.

Soul Men is in post-production and is slated for a November 14, 2008 theatrical release.


Go to the Front Page
UnNews Senior Editors are currently inserting left-wing bias into this related article:

Morgan Freeman crashes car; Jessica Tandy in critical condition