Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/December 24

December 24: Crimbo Eve (Iraq), International Peas Day

• 1 - Some important guy is almost born. Sort of.
• 1214 - Ye Olde Barter Shoppe in York offers the first Christmas sale ever. However, it is marred by protests for using the word "sale".
• 1777 - Captain James Cook discovers a new island, which by an incredible coincidence happens to be named Christmas Island (what are the odds?).
• 1865 - Some Civil War veterans take the idea of a "White Christmas" a bit too far.
• 1895 - A man invents a new kind of poison. Somehow, neither him nor the poison were heard from again.
• 1914 - During the Christmas Truce, British and German soldiers take a break from killing each other, in order to celebrate Peace on Earth.
• 1929 - Hitler freaks out because he forgot to buy a Jewish friend a present, and then attempts to "cover up" for it.
• 1934 - The boomerang is declared the gayest invention ever. The joke being that it isn't straight. Hur-hur.
• 1968 - NASA fakes the first manned mission to orbit the Moon – Apollo 8. Gawd, just look at all the strings holding up everything!
• 1974 - God sends Cyclone Tracy to destroy most of Darwin, Australia for having the nerve to be named after that evolution guy.
• 1975 - Canadians attempt to invade the United States but run into a street hockey game, then proceed to change their minds.
• 1977 - The Goodies blow up the world. Accidents happen, after all.
• 1984 - Santa Claus fulfills prophecy as he dies for the sins of mankind, to give man eternal neckties and sweaters.
• 1995 - Tim Allen declares that he wishes he was really Santa Claus.
• 1997 - There is nearly an outbreak of Zombies. However the whole thing is prevented on account of people having seen way too many zombie movies, and who just close their doors. Will Smith forgets his house keys.
• 2009 - A pickle receives more fans on Facebook than Nickelback.
• 2012 - According to Aztec/Inca/anything-to-do-with-South-American mythology, we were due to instantly die a few days ago. We're still here. However, the President is attacked by a baboon with a desk calendar.