Pride Fighting Championships
“Pride fighting isnt gay like Ultimate Fighting, but I'm still too scared to compete”
“People fight for Pride in Pride fighting Championships”
Pride Fighting Championships, people prefer to call it PRIDE or sometimes PRIDE FC like the soccer clubs, was a spiritual Buddhist temple up in the Soul Society from Bleach. It held fights for warriors coming from different Martial arts backgrounds and it was better than the UFC.
History[edit]
(Old ChineseGrandmaster accent)The story of Pride FC begins in a time many centuries ago when a clash between two of the most badass ass kicking mother fuckers took place in a world far away from ours, these two men were Bruce Lee and Chuck Norris. The two were so evenly matched and so powerful that the fight brought the apocolypse to their world, the two floated through space for many centuries and ended up in our world, learning their lesson from their mistakes, they decided not to fight again, except for a movie scene. They tought their Martial arts to people from different parts of the world, these would eventually divide into the Martial arts people do today, when they were divided, there were debates as to what is the best one, so the Yakuza in Japan travelled to the Soul Society and founded a new organization and named it Pride FC.
Fighters of different backgrounds such as Judo, Boxing, Brazilian Jiu jitsu, Karate, Kickboxing, Muay Thai and wrestling faced off, people would kick the shit out of each other and bow down in respect, unlike the human cock fights in UFC where the bastards kick the shit out of each other and finger the crowd.
Dan Henderson later proved himself to be the greatest fighter to ever be employed by the PRIDE organization by being the P4P best in 4 divisions by obtaining the welterweight and middleweight championships and defeating the former Pride Heavyweight Champion, Fedor, after the company's dissolution.
Popularity[edit]
People loved Pride FC a lot better than UFC, some people say its because fighters respected each other and bowed down and stuff, who gives a fuck about that? The only reason it was so bad ass was because of the fucking stomps and soccer kicks, HELL YEAH! Because otherwise it would just be people beating each other for points.
Comparison with UFC[edit]
Words cannot describe how much better Pride is. Mainly they could do steroids and soccer kick people in the face.
Legendary Moments[edit]
Nick the "dick" Diaz once stoned himself to fight the lightweight Champion Takanori "The fireball bitch" Gomi. Gomi got contact high from punching his face and then fell asleep with Nick's foot on his neck. at another time, Russian bad ass heavyweight, Fedor Emelianenko fought to the death with Kevin Randleman, Randleman humped him from the back and did a back flip and Fedor landed on his head but got up like it was just a pillow shot, Randleman begged for forgiveness making it a submission victory for Fedor Emelianenko. Once Kazushi Sakudada fought with BJJ legend, Royce Gracie and whooped his ass, then Royce jiuced up and outpointed poor Saku.
Pride Bushido[edit]
Pride FC began holding a series of tournaments called Pride Bushido in which people faced each other in a traditional Japanese manner, wearing Sumo thongs and saying "Banzai" every now and then, the winner of each tournament would win 5 yen and a free Sushi.
Downfall[edit]
Everybody knew how much better Pride was than UFC, so the chairman, Dana "The Douche" White got super jealous, he borrowed some money from his mama and bought Pride with it and merged it with his promotion, some fighters were like "meh, sure I'll fight for you", while others said "Fuck this I'm going to Strikeforce/Dream/Affliction/Sengoku/M-1". Now the best fighters in UFC are the ones that came from Pride, while the originals like Chuck Liddell, Keith Jardine, Randy Couture and Sean Sherk just keep getting raped.
The Last Champions[edit]
- Heavyweight: Fedor Emelianenko, he attained the title after kicking the shit out of Antonio Minotauro Roadkiller Snogueira by pounding on him from the missionary... err I mean guard position! Minotauro tried using his BJJ but to no avail as Fedor is the world's best Samba dancer.
- Light heavyweight: This title didnt exist.-They never gave Dan a chance.
- Middleweight: Dan Henderson-by vicious, career ending H-bomb
- Welterweight: Dan Henderson- I bet you wish he was your dad.
- Lightweight: Takanori "The fireball bitch" Gomi: He likes to drink a lot like he did in celebration of beating Tatsuya Kawajiri, his loss to BJ Penn gave him motivation to get his ass back in the gym and train.