Hypoposuitpedemeria
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Literal translation from latin: lack of/yearning for "put foot"
This disease started manifesting near the second half of 2011 shortly after the inaugural [Poot Foot Rally][1]
Causes, symptoms and treatment[edit]
It is believed to be contracted during the Put Foot Rally event but only manifests after an undetermined time after the event. This has led researchers to conclude that the disease is of viral nature due to the fact that it stays dormant and only manifests after the fact. It is not contagious.
The physical symptoms of Hypoposuitpedemeria are few, but they include a constant thirst for R&R (Rum&Raspberry: a cocktail of Sparletta Sparberry soda and Tipo Tinto rum) as well as an itchy right foot. The psychological symptoms are much worse and include chronic apathy confusion and dissatisfaction with everyday life
Diagnosis[edit]
In the absence of such outwardly visible manifestations, Hypoposuitpedemeria is best diagnosed by an oral/posterior examination, which often involves closely questioning the patient about their state of mind, recent travel history, view on travelling Southern Africa and visual inspection of the posterior (butt-cheeks). If all the following tests are positive, the patient definitely has contracted Hypoposuitpedemeria.
1. Has the patient recently been a crew-member (or staff member) on a Poot Foot Rally? 2. Are symptoms of Post Adventure Blues or Travel Withdrawal? 3. Do they express an intense desire to travel in Southern Africa? 4. Do they have a visibly flattened arse from sitting in a car for an extended period?
Support Groups[edit]
Sufferers seem to find solace in staying connected with other sufferers and even having reunions which seem to ease the symptoms temporarily but this is likely due to mass-hysteria and the consumption of R&R
Conspiracy Theory[edit]
Since it is not contagious and has not been contacted by anyone who has never participated a Put Foot Rally, there are speculations that the virus is administered by the organizers of the event in order to ensure return business. This is backed by the fact that many participants do indeed return to partake in the event multiple times